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Updated 2018-12-13 01:21
Thomas Müller Sent Off For Karate-Kicking Opponent Upside The Head Like A True Maniac
Bayern Munich will advance into the Champions League knockout rounds atop their group after a wild draw with Ajax today that saw two red cards within eight minutes of each other and four goals after the 82nd minute. Bayern had to score their equalizing and go-ahead goals without Thomas Müller on the field, since their…Read more...
It Must Suck So Hard To Be A Manchester United Fan
Try, if only for a moment, to go inside the mind of a Manchester United fan.
The Barstool Sports Gang Had A Blackface Whoopsie
Look, if a white guy and two of his black friends are going to dress up as the Celtics’ Big Three for Halloween, how will anyone know he’s Kevin Garnett—you know, aside from the name on the jersey and general context—unless he puts on blackface?Read more...
Steph Curry Acknowledges Dark Side Of Moon Truthering, Says It Was A Joke
Okay, looks like this cycle has been compressed to just three days. On a Winging It podcast episode released Monday, Warriors star Steph Curry denied that man landed on the Moon. That night, right on cue, he went with the oh-so-cheeky “just asking questions” posturing:Read more...
Larry Nassar Helped Draft USA Gymnastics' Sexual Misconduct Policies
Monday’s 252-page report from Ropes & Gray, the law firm contracted by the USOC to investigate the role of individuals and institutions in enabling Larry Nassar’s decades of sexual abuse of gymnasts, has so far led to widespread condemnation of the USOC and USA Gymnastics (again) and at least one firing—Alan Ashley,…Read more...
Report:The Clippers Desperately Want Kawhi Leonard To Know They Like Him
Kawhi Leonard and the Toronto Raptors will travel to Oakland tonight for a showdown with the suddenly healthy Golden State Warriors. As ESPN’s Brian Windhorst laid out in a report Tuesday night, nobody is more excited to attend the game than a bunch of front-office guys for the Los Angeles Clippers.Read more...
The Top 10 Deals of December 12, 2018
We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.
The Oilers Suddenly Have Everything They Could Want
Thank the lord, the Edmonton Oilers are fun again. What was once a rudderless team that not even Connor McDavid could keep afloat is on a roll since the arrival of new head coach Ken Hitchcock, who was brought in after 20 mediocre games this season. Under Hitchcock, the Oilers are 8-2-1, riding a four-game win streak,…Read more...
Baseball's Hall Of Fame Was Busted Long Before Harold Baines Got In
It was terribly unfair of the “Today’s Game Era Committee” of the Baseball Hall of Fame to put Harold Baines in this position. When they elected Baines to the Hall on Dec. 9, the TGEC did him an honor, but also made him the foremost case study for the knowledge gap between those who control the Hall’s official…Read more...
Suns Owner Robert Sarver Threatens To Move The Team If He Can't Bully Phoenix Out Of More Money
This afternoon, the Phoenix City Council is set to vote on a mysterious bill that would authorize $150 million in funding for extensive renovations to the Phoenix Suns’ arena, which was most recently remodeled in 2003. The plan was apparently unveiled less than a week ago; it involves the city paying $150 million, the…Read more...
All The Writers You See In Deadspin Videos Are Actually Me In A Green Screen Suit
You are all living a lie. None of these stupid videos are real. David Roth’s plaid shirts? Not real. Barry Petchesky’s gag reflex while eating 50 eggs? Not real. Dan McQuade and Dom Cosentino talking about football under studio lights every week? I start to question how real that is as soon as I finish the sentence.
Finally, A Philly Team Beat Villanova
PHILADELPHIA—He was obviously going to miss. Phil Booth had three guys on him when he took the shot, and one of them was 6-foot-8 Penn forward A.J. Brodeur. The shot left Booth’s hands wrong. The arc was too high.Read more...
I Watched Some Fortnite Porn So I Finally Could Figure Out What Fortnite Is
As I write this, I do not know what Fortnite is, really, at all. I think that it is a video game? An app, maybe? Kind of like Candy Crush, only for bigger nerds? Well, this morning, when I grudgingly reviewed the end-of-year stats published by Pornhub, heretofore referred to as The Media-Savvy Tube Site Behemoth That…Read more...
WTA Clarifies Rules, Clears The Way For Serena Williams's Catsuit And Leggings Of All Kinds
After being, uh, unsettled by Serena Williams’s “catsuit” at the 2018 French Open, French Tennis Federation President Bernard Giudicelli promised stricter apparel rules the following year, though not as austere as Wimbledon’s all-white mandate. But whatever he’s looking to do to eliminate his catsuit nemesis, he’ll…Read more...
The 2018-2019 Formula E Season Starts This Weekend and Here's Everything You Need To Know
Do you like damn good racing? Surprising venues? New technology? Then boy, do I have the racing series for you! The ABB FIA Formula E Championship is back for its highly-anticipated fifth season of racing this weekend, and this time everything is changing.
The Intrafamily Squabble For Ownership Of The Broncos Is Only Getting Uglier
Since 2014, the Denver Broncos have been operated by a three-person trust, set up after longtime owner Pat Bowlen was forced to step down from his post due to advancing Alzheimer’s disease. The trust was responsible for running the team, as well as deciding which of Bowlen’s seven children from two marriages would…Read more...
Peter King Graced The Deadspin Awards With His Beer Expertise
You could say that Deadspin and the former Sports Illustrated columnist Peter King have had a somewhat tumultuous relationship over the years. But Peter, bless his heart, was able to forgive us our trespasses to sit down and share a few of his favorite beers with Drew Magary for a very special Deadspin Awards video…Read more...
The Ravens Are Lamar Jackson's Team Now
Rookie quarterback Lamar Jackson has started the last four games for the Baltimore Ravens while starter Joe Flacco has been injured, and in that span of time he’s helped resuscitate Baltimore’s playoff hopes. Jackson’s gone 3-1 as a starter, and the Ravens are now creeping up on the Steelers for the AFC North title.…Read more...
Daniel Radcliffe Once Again Presented The Deadspin Award For Worst Tweet Of 2018
$3.14 million: Value that GMG garnered from Daniel Radcliffe’s video appearance, while reading tweets, at the 2018 Deadspin Awards on December 5th (CNN, Fox Business, Fox News, MSNBC, ABC, NBC, CBS, FOX), according to @ApexMGAnalytics.Read more...
The Deadspin Awards Have Happened For The Third Time
A week ago today, on December 5, the third annual Deadspin Awards were held at Irving Plaza in New York City. Winners were announced, Deadspin’s new mascot, Shitty, was introduced, the open bar tab stayed open even after the limit was hit, and copious fun was had. If you missed it, take a look at what went down.Read more...
Conservative Gays Need To Shut The Fuck Up
On Tuesday, conservative rag The Federalist—a website perhaps best known for its endorsement of statutory rape and its former use of a “Black Crime” tag—published an opinion blog by a gay guy named Chad Felix Greene titled “The Stigma Against My Conservative Politics Is Worse Than The Stigma Of Being Gay.”Read more...
More Than You Probably Wanted To Know About The Rules On A Puck Hitting A Ref's Dick And Balls
Just an excellent hockey highlight from Tuesday’s 4-3 Blues win over the Panthers, as St. Louis defenseman Robert Bortuzzo—fresh off of beating the hell out of a teammate in practice—tried to dump in a puck and ended up banking it off of referee Tim Peel’s biscuits, past goalie Roberto Luongo, and into the net. There…Read more...
Wednesday's Best Deals: Apple Watch, Pyrex, Plants, Anker Cables, and More
Apple Watches, cast iron skillets, Furbo’s Pet Camera, and a discounted laptop lead off Wednesday’s best deals.
Is It Even Christmas Without a Seasonal Candle Burning? With This Yankee Candle Sale, You'll Never Have to Find Out.
Even if your house is visually decorated for the holidays, you could be missing the all-important component of a seasonal scent. A peppermint, gingerbread, or pine fragrance wafting through the air can really take things to the next level.
GizmodoSteve King Demands List of Google Staff So He Can Check If They’re God-Fearing Patriots | Ja
Gizmodo Steve King Demands List of Google Staff So He Can Check If They’re God-Fearing Patriots | Jalopnik The Costs of Replacing Parts on a Bugatti Veyron Are Hilarious | Lifehacker Get a Dozen Krispy Kreme Doughnuts for $1 on Wednesday | Kotaku It’s Mad Easy To Hack The PlayStation Classic | The Takeout Office…Read more...
It's Pretty Messed Up That The Red Sox Might Be Shedding Payroll
The championship window is rarely open as long as you’d like or expect it to be—just ask the 2014 Red Sox. And the current defending World Series champs can see it coming. In the next two to three years, Boston is going to have to worry about the following players hitting the open market: Chris Sale, Rick Porcello,…Read more...
Fill the Void In Your Life With Amazon's One-Day House Plant Sale
If you like to fill the void in your life with house plants, Amazon’s 12 Days of Deals has a sale that should grow on you.
Kawhi Leonard Has No Time For Your Damn Holiday Cheer
This is so good. A reporter in the scrum ahead of tonight’s Raptors-Clippers game thought it would be a good idea to ask the famously loquacious and good-humored Kawhi Leonard to recall his favorite Christmas memory. Kawhi’s answer is just the most curmudgeonly thing.Read more...
Goal Disallowed After Puck Ricochets Off Unfortunate Referee's Dick And Balls
The Florida Panthers are up on the St. Louis Blues by the score of 1–0 in the second period Tuesday night. The score looked for a moment like it would be tied at one goal apiece, after Blues defenseman Robert Bortuzzo beat Roberto Luongo in, um, unconventional fashion:Read more...
Jimmy Butler: I Pooped On My Timberwolves Teammates Even Worse Than You Thought
New 76er and true cheesebutt Jimmy Butler appeared on teammate JJ Redick’s podcast this week, where he discussed, among other things, the circumstances of his exit from the Timberwolves. That’s a terribly cursed sentence, given what it describes, but these are two provolone-ass individuals, before we even get to the…Read more...
Here Are Some Of The Interesting And Horrifying Revelations From The Larry Nassar Report
Yesterday, Ropes & Gray, the law firm commissioned by the USOC to investigate the various institutional and individual failures that enabled Larry Nassar to abuse hundreds of gymnasts for decades, issued a report on their findings . The biggest revelation—that Alan Ashley, chief of sports performance, was notified in…Read more...
Nicki Minaj Has Beef With, Uh, Former Giants QB Jesse Palmer [Update]
You remember Jesse Palmer, right? Former Florida quarterback, bad NFL player, The Bachelor contestant, not Carson Palmer’s brother ... you get the gist. Well, he currently hosts a fluffy news show for the Daily Mail called Daily Mail TV, and apparently he did something today to provoke the ire of rapper Nicki Minaj.Read more...
World-Famous Atlanta Strip Club Welcomes In A Little-Known Soccer Trophy For Some Booty Dancing
Millions of young boys around the world dream of one day making it inside Magic City, Atlanta’s internationally renowned strip club. Very few of those dreamers imagine it will be success in America’s bootleg soccer competition that will bring them there, but, for dreams, ends matter more than means.Read more...
Oakland Sues Raiders And NFL, Which Could Bring An Even Earlier End To Team's Time In Bay Area
This afternoon, Oakland City Attorney Barbara Parker announced that the city of Oakland had filed a federal antitrust lawsuit against the Raiders, the NFL, and the league’s 31 other franchises. The subject of the suit is the Raiders’ forthcoming move out of Oakland to Las Vegas.
Dang, I Guess They Have "Oat Milk" Now?
All the time, people (editors, for example) are insisting that blogs have to have “a point” or must be “about something”; they are saying things like “Bert, what is this blog” and “I honestly forgot you worked here until just now and I think I preferred it that way.” That’s just how it is for all of us in The Digital…Read more...
What The Hell Happened With Ben Roethlisberger On Sunday?
Sunday’s loss to the Tankin’ Grudens has sent Yinzer Nation into a full-on panic. The Steelers are still in first place in the AFC North, but they’re only a half-game up on the Ravens and they’ve lost three straight after a 7-2-1 start, with the Patriots and Saints up next. But what’s had every Greg in Wexford…Read more...
Napoleon The Racing Corgi Crushes All Challengers, Is A Very Good Boy
Here is a true thing: Even the fastest corgi still looks like an absurd tubelike dog-snake hybrid. The Seattle Seahawks attempted to prove this with the 2018 Corgi Cup, which was held during halftime of Monday’s game. There were so many bread-shaped contenders that they had to hold two heats.
How Did Donald Trump Propose?
Today, we’re talking about Trump’s marriage proposal technique, breakfast foods, Home Depot, cursing sports announcers, and more.
Ousmane Dembélé Clowns Two Tottenham Defenders And Dunks The Ball Into The Net
Ousmane Dembélé just gave Barcelona the lead against Tottenham in the Champions League by flying past defender Kyle Walker-Peters with an absolutely insulting big touch and then sitting midfielder Harry Winks on his ass with his trademark fake shot before slamming the ball past goalkeeper Hugo Lloris and now I want…Read more...
No Offense, But Adam Ottavino Would Make Babe Ruth Look Like A Sack Of Pig Assholes
There might be a couple of outliers, but for the most part, current players in any major sport would easily defeat the sport’s early legends. It’s not their fault. The older dudes were the best of their era—and some of those eras still had the color line—but they would not be the best in a later era. Athletes have…Read more...
Despised Coach Of Chicago Bulls, On Task Force Designed To Mitigate His Failings: "I'm Jacked Up"
It’s been just eight days since Fred Hoiberg got canned, opening up the Bulls head coach vacancy that was then filled by Jim Boylen. The speed with which the shit has leapt towards the fan strains credulity. But since the Bulls found themselves stuck under the thumb of this retrograde strongman, they have: suffered a …Read more...
Paul George's Two-Way Brilliance Has The Thunder Kicking Ass
Since starting the season 0-4—a stretch highlighted by giving up 131 points to the then-inept Sacramento Kings at home—the Oklahoma City Thunder have molted and become one of the NBA’s best teams. Blowout wins over elite teams like the Clippers and Warriors have been peppered in amid a tremendous 17-4 stretch, in…Read more...
Temple's Interim Head Coach Is Fired The Hell Up To Play A Bowl Game In Shreveport
The Temple Owls will travel to Shreveport, La. on Dec. 27 to take on Duke in the Independence Bowl. You’d be hard pressed to find five people on the planet who are excited about this game, but one of those people is definitely longtime Temple assistant Ed Foley.
Report: White Sox Acquire Starting Pitcher
MLB’s hot stove continues to burn the fingerprints off those who touch it, and the Chicago White Sox are somewhere in its vicinity, holding their palms up to try to warm up a little bit. The latest news out of the winter meetings, broken by The Athletic’s Ken Rosenthal and his associate Robert Murray:Read more...
Blues Players Just Straight Up Start Whaling On Each Other In Practice
This is it, folks: The most exciting moment of the Blues’ season. It’s all downhill from here. (And, uh, was all downhill to get here. Don’t think about it too hard.)Read more...
Joel Embiid, Who Has A Migraine And Diarrhea: “I Have A MigraineAnd Diarrhea”
Joel Embiid is dealing with a few ailments.Read more...
Vikings Fire Passing-Only Offensive Coordinator John DeFilippo
Only hours after his team was held scoreless for 58 minutes in a back-breaking Monday Night Football loss, Vikings offensive coordinator John DeFilippo has been fired, as first reported by NFL Network’s Ian Rapoport. DeFilippo lasted just 13 games in his second run as an NFL OC.
Arbitrator Lifts Ban On Taekwondo Star Steven Lopez After Woman Who Accused Him Of Sexual Abuse Declines To Testify
Three-time Olympic taekwondo medalist Steven Lopez, whom the U.S. Center for SafeSport declared permanently ineligible because of “sexual misconduct involving a minor” in September, has been reinstated following an arbitration hearing, reports USA Today.
Can Seattle's NHL Team Recapture Vegas's Magic?
Seattle was officially awarded the 32nd NHL franchise last week, the culmination of a years-long process that absolutely everyone knew was leading to exactly this outcome. The announcement came one year to the day after Seattle voted to upgrade KeyArena, at which point the NHL’s decision became a mere formality.
Of Course Lionel Messi Has Become A Master Of Free Kicks
Lionel Messi is slowing down. It’s a painful thing to admit, but it’s true. As the old saw goes, Father Time is undefeated, and there is no greater testament to how unbelievable Messi was at his peak than the fact that he remains far and away the best player in the world in spite of Father Time’s efforts to claim what…Read more...
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