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Even on days where she’s far from perfect, Simon Biles is still able to prove that labeling her as the greatest gymnast of all time might be an understatement. The latest example of this came on Friday in Kansas City, Mo. at the U.S. Gymnastics championships, when she decided to become the first person in history to…Read more...

On Monday, a crew from the city of Huntington, W. Va. cut down a tree that residents nearby determined was potentially dangerous after a storm blew a branch through the windshield of a parked car. Unfortunately, the crew’s approach to their job was rather negligent and the tree fell on top of a different car that…Read more...

It was always going to be just a matter of time before Roth’s suggestion that the Mets will never lose again would come around and bite him in the ass, and in the top of the fourth of the team’s game against the Nationals on Friday, it certainly looked like that’s what was about to happen.

Connecticut police officers drew their guns on Yankees general manager Brian Cashman at a gas station on Friday after the team executive was mistaken for an armed car thief, according to a report from the New York Post.

After a short summer break, the Premier League is back. Liverpool hosted Norwich City in the first match of the season today in a game that featured five goals, several wondrous feats of athleticism, and one pitch invader who made it onto the field just long enough to show the world his dick and ass crack.Read more...

Yesterday, when WNBA star Breanna Stewart let her fans know she’ll be in NBA 2K20, coming out September 9, the top response asked whether the basketball game, which has a MyCareer mode, has a MyKitchen mode, too.

Antonio Brown’s tenure as a member of the Oakland Raiders could not be getting off to a weirder start. First came the pictures of his mangled feet, then the reports that said mangling occurred when he stepped into a cryotherapy chamber barefoot and got frostbite. Now, things have taken an even stranger turn. According…Read more...

We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.Read more...

In his apt criticism of team owner Stephen Ross’s support of Donald Trump, Dolphins wide receiver Kenny Stills has the truth, accuracy, and righteousness on his side—but not, it seems, his own head coach.Read more...

The Titans beat the Eagles 27-10 in a preseason NFL game in South Philadelphia last night, but the teams mostly played backups. The real action was outside the stadium!

Do you feel that? That’s the oncoming rush of another Premier League season, which officially kicks off on Friday. After the greatest title race in league history last season, the Premier League could have a worthy sequel on its hands. League runners-up Liverpool returned all the important parts of their Champions…Read more...

Late in Cleveland’s preseason win over Washington last night, rookie return specialist Damon Sheehy-Guiseppi fielded a punt and zipped mostly untouched, 86 yards, all the way to the opposite end zone. Despite the inherent meaninglessness of the game and the already gaudy scoreline, Sheehy-Guiseppi’s Browns teammates…Read more...

When it comes to marrying brain-frozen, heavily armed plutocracy with mindless and quasi-religious ritual, the National Football League pretty much got there ahead of everybody. The number of NFL owners whose general political and social outlook has progressed past the conventional wisdom of the Arthur Administration…Read more...

The acrimonious and not-all-that-beneficial cohabitation of Mark Davis’s Raiders and the Oakland Athletics should come to a definitive end following this upcoming football season. Construction of the Raiders’ new stadium in Las Vegas is tentatively on schedule to wrap up next July; barring any huge setbacks, the…Read more...

Romelu Lukaku has officially moved from Manchester United to Inter, which means it’s time for those deliciously juicy stories about how the relationship soured to start popping up. The Times has one particularly funny nugget, about how manager Ole Gunnar Solskjær subjected the Belgian to a “‘brutal’ verbal attack”…Read more...

Donald Trump goes by many names, but none is more apt than “the Big Wet President,” coined by our David Roth. The second adjective gets at a spiritual if not literal truth: the leader of the free world is always just kind of limply flopping around, even if he rarely glistens in actual coat of moisture.Read more...

Georgia Southern starting QB Shai Werts was charged on July 31 for misdemeanor cocaine possession after cops in Saluda County, South Carolina pulled him over for speeding and then tested a white substance on the hood of his car. If you’re wondering why anyone would have cocaine on the hood of their car, well, they…Read more...

Vince McMahon is nothing if not predictable.

Some people are fans of the Washington Redskins. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Washington Redskins. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here.

The Buffalo Bills are taking a shot on a British rugby player this preseason, and with the very first touch of his first-ever gridiron football exhibition game, Christian Wade looked like he belonged more than anyone else on that pitch—er, field.Read more...

After getting called out by his own player, Kenny Stills, for hosting a fundraiser for wet racist Donald Trump, Dolphins owner Stephen Ross attempted to perform some damage control with a limp-dick statement about being buddies with Trump despite disagreeing with him about certain issues:

The Premier League begins Friday. By Sunday, at least one manager will be rumored to be in trouble “if results do not improve.”Read more...

This weekend’s planned airing of the EXP Apex Legends Invitational at X Games tournament on ESPN2 has been postponed by the network, “out of respect for the victims and all those impacted in the immediate aftermath of the shootings.”Read more...

Time was running out in the first half of the Bears’ preseason loss to the Panthers on Thursday night, and Chicago was in field goal range. Well, ostensibly. Bears coach Matt Nagy took one look at the spot of the ball after the half’s penultimate play, and immediately had sweaty-palmed flashbacks. Doink. Doink.

Right. So I won’t.Read more...

iRobot Roomba 671 | $230 | AmazonRead more...

Listen. If Bill Walton is calling a given day “the greatest day of my life,” that’s a real day! The man has been many places and done many things. He won two NCAA championships, two NBA titles, and an MVP, to say nothing of getting married and having kids and all that type of stuff. But apparently none of that…Read more...

The ninth inning of Thursday night’s Cubs-Reds game was a real circus, and I mean that in a good way. The Reds were down 12–5, they’d used four pitchers, and they were not coming back, so to finish the eighth and work the ninth they turned pitching duties over to Kyle Farmer, a second-baseman. Farmer, God bless him,…Read more...

Blue Jays rookie Bo Bichette continued his otherworldly tear in the batter’s box on Thursday, smoking a 441-foot bomb into the second deck off of Yankees pitcher Domingo German with an incredibly satisfying crack of the bat.

It’s generally lame when non-baseball athletes use non-baseballs to complete ceremonial first pitches. You see this most often with football players, using their vile spheroids to throw first pitches that really have nothing to do with the sport of baseball. If you can’t get a baseball all the way to the catcher, at…Read more...

This will be hailed as unselfishness and a team-friendly move, but it’s actually neither of those things: Russell Westbrook, in order to facilitate his trade to the Houston Rockets, agreed to restructure his supermax contract and shift the payment of some of his salary into the future.Read more...

Eight-year veteran receiver Jermaine Kearse was carted off the field on Thursday after Patriots defensive back Terrence Brooks inadvertently rolled onto the back of the receiver’s leg. Brooks collided with Kearse’s leg while trying to bring down Detroit rookie back Ty Johnson in the first quarter of the Lions-Pats…Read more...

Resident beer aficionado and self-important All-Pro voter Peter King joined Dan Patrick on his show earlier today to discuss the usual slate of topics that Football Knowers are often brought on to discuss. In the middle of talking about Ezekiel Elliott’s holdout with the Cowboys, King had to cut the call short as a…Read more...

Adam Gase is a sleep-deprived maniac who powers himself through each workday with “five or six 20-ounce cups” of coffee plus the occasional Red Bull, because his regular Football Man routine provides less than four hours of sleep per night. But on gamedays, when Gase needs that extra boost, it appears he is not above…Read more...

Zlatan Ibrahimović’s summer of righteous discontent continues. Less than a month after taking a dump on MLS’s best player, likening his own presence in the league to a “Ferrari among Fiats,” and even calling an opposing coach a “little bitch,” the L.A. Galaxy striker has today taken aim at the league’s…Read more...

How about those freakin’ Mets, eh? Their relievers stink! They’re bums! Those guys are probably losing games on purpose because of the damn Mexican drug cartel!

A 32-year-old Englishman was arrested this morning on suspicion of committing a hate crime for sending a tweet that, according to the Liverpool Echo, included “racist slurs and pictures” of Liverpool’s Egyptian forward, Mohamed Salah.

The Argentina women’s national basketball team had to forfeit its preliminary round game against Colombia in the Pan American Games on Wednesday, losing 20-0 and screwing itself out of the medal round because the team showed up wearing the wrong color jerseys. For this embarrassing mistake, both the team manager and…Read more...

At the 1999 X Games in San Francisco, Tony Hawk became the first person in competitive skateboarding history to land a 900, two-and-a-half rotations. It took 20 years, but someone’s added another 360 degrees. At last week’s X Games in Minneapolis, 22-year-old Mitchie Brusco pulled off the first 1260 in skating…Read more...

By now, mass shooters have a distinct profile in the collective imagination and the eyes of the state: They are usually men, they are often white, nearly half are suicidal. An inordinate number have been the perpetrators of domestic abuse. Many purchase at least one weapon to carry out their plan. They leave behind…Read more...

On a sweltering July morning in Los Angeles, the LA 2028 flags flew as “Mayor” Eric Garcetti stood on the steps of City Hall and cancelled The LA 2028 Olympic games. The games that he had insisted on were being called off, citing the absurd costs, impossibility of staging outdoor events due to climate change, and…Read more...

Monday’s episode of Raw closed with The Miz hosting a contract signing for what was supposed to be a SummerSlam match with Dolph Ziggler, which certainly sounds like typical WWE stuff. The fact that it was happening in the main event was a bit suspicious, though, as was the presence of Shawn Michaels a former WWE…Read more...

On Thursday, the Yankees, White Sox, and MLB announced a partnership to play a regular-season game next year at—or, more precisely, near—the iconic Field of Dreams. This follows the recent trend of the league scheduling meaningful games in non-traditional places like Japan, Mexico, and London.

Some people are fans of the Atlanta Falcons. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Atlanta Falcons. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here.

Bria Anderson, wife of White Sox shortstop Tim, had a heated Instagram discussion with Elizabeth Swarzak, wife of Braves reliever Anthony, about gun violence and race, the impetus being last weekend’s mass shootings in El Paso and Dayton. Swarzak, whose IG account is now protected, came off sounding very dumb.

After a blown pass interference call late in the fourth quarter of last year’s NFC Championship game, Saints coach Sean Payton said that “we’ll probably never get over it.” Based on the reaction of Saints fans since, that seems to be the case.Read more...

Dr. Seymour Stoll was generous. He did not need to share his historically significant collection of Jewish baseball cards with us, let alone do so in his home, although it was always quite clear that he was quite happy to do so. He did not need to let Jorge and me carry his couch clear across the living room and stick…Read more...

All poor Carmelo Anthony wants to do is play basketball, for whoever will have him. He recently went on ESPN to talk about his abrupt exit from the Rockets and then the NBA, and though he did not quite seem to grapple with Houston’s on-court case for getting rid of him, it is still bizarre that he has gone from…Read more...

Everyone has probably had some version of the dream before: naked in class, unprepared for a final exam, publicly humiliated by Jennifer Connelly in a crowded restaurant (this may just be me), tasked with running away from or catching up to something only to find that your feet have turned into caramel. Through my…Read more...

Well well, the evil billionaire chief of Equinox gyms is holding a big Trump fundraiser, and now Equinox customers are threatening a boycott. Allow me, the smart guy, to tell you when you should have started boycotting Equinox “gym”: the very day that you began your fitness journey.Read more...