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Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here.

The South is not misunderstood. It never has been.Read more...

This past summer, the Bulls had $20 million in cap space, and they decided to spend it on bringing in hometown hero Jabari Parker on a two-year deal. When healthy, Parker had previously been a fringe all-star-level scorer, although the former second overall pick’s career has been maimed by a pair of nasty ACL tears.…Read more...

To clear up any confusion, let’s get this out of the way: Merril Hoge and Peter Cummings, who co-authored a book called Brainwashed: The Bad Science Behind CTE and The Plot to Destroy Football, are not CTE deniers. They do not dismiss the scientific notion that repetitive brain trauma is a high-risk factor for the…Read more...

Back in July, at the WNBA All-Star weekend in Minneapolis, a league official sidled up to me and asked me a question. Did I know how much money the WNBA had lost last season?

Given how easy it is for even their fans to forget about the Chicago White Sox’s existence, the most notable thing about baseball’s ongoing annual general manager meetings has probably been that several reporters for national outlets have written about the team, whose most recent campaign was highlighted by a variety…Read more...

KSNV News 3 sportscaster Randy Howe was arrested Tuesday morning for allegedly masturbating at an unnamed bar in North Las Vegas, according to a police report obtained by the Las Vegas Sun. Police have charged him with indecent exposure and open gross lewdness.Read more...

When Derrick Rose splashed a step-back three with 1:07 to go in last night’s Timberwolves-Lakers game, it left the Lakers with a one-point lead that felt like a deficit. Rose is a career 30-percent three-point shooter, and that triple was his seventh made three of the game and his third in less than three minutes.…Read more...

The Dallas Cowboys added wide receiver Amari Cooper in a trade with the Oakland Raiders during their bye week. It helped! Cooper was the Cowboys’ leading receiver, catching 5 passes for 58 yards and a score on Monday night. It didn’t help the Cowboys win, of course: They lost at home to the Tennessee Titans, 28-14.Read more...

Predators defenseman P.K. Subban had himself a nice little chat with Avalanche defender Nikita Zadorov during a stoppage in play in Nashville’s 4-1 last night. Zadorov apparently invited Subban to fight him, and although the confrontation wasn’t caught on camera, a hot mic in the arena picked up some of what Subban…Read more...

NEW YORK — I can’t even get the binoculars to work.

If I may take you Inside The Game for a moment: the Deadcast was in Tennessee this week, for an intimate and robustly seasoned and extremely fun live recording at Headquarters Beercade in downtown Nashville on Monday. The plan was to put that podcast online and on this website today, and we are indeed sticking to…Read more...

Because James Conner is good and the Steelers are 5-2, everyone seems to have decided that Le’Veon Bell’s extended holdout was a bad idea. This new consensus may be wearing on Bell, based on these two weird tweets he sent yesterday:

Behind the scenes, whenever he might have been shooting the shit or just taking questions from reporters when there weren’t cameras around, Jerry Burns had a penchant for weaving curse words into whatever he was saying.Read more...

Kotaku PlayStation Classic Plays Fine, But It’s A Bare-Bones Experience | io9 Updates From the Super Mario Bros. Movie, Black Widow, and More | Lifehacker These Are the Best and Worst Airports in the United States | Jalopnik At $13,999, Is This 2005 Maserati Quattroporte Neiman Marcus Edition a Great Deal or Just a…Read more...

Here in our little puck corner of the internet, there are going to be few exercises this week more fraught than having an opinion on this. So let’s do it and then yell at each other!

New York Mets minor leaguer Tim Tebow will ascend to Triple-A baseball in Syracuse in 2019, according to the new Mets GM Brodie Van Wagenen, who was also Tebow’s agent up until last week when he took the Mets job, the Associated Press reports.Read more...

If you weren’t expecting another Clear the Rack sale until Black Friday, I’ve got some good new: it’s happening right now. As usual, the sale is full (and I mean ~20,000 items FULL) of really incredible deals for men and women, with tons of stuff available under $10. Designer clothing, brands you’ve never heard of,…Read more...

You don’t have to settle for coffee that slowly gets colder as the morning wears on. This mug has a battery and heating element built right in, and can maintain the temperature of your choice.

Behold, Nikola Jokic’s one shot attempt against the Memphis Grizzlies on Wednesday night. In what will hopefully be his worst game of the season, the Nuggets center ended up scoring all four of his points from the free throw line while earning five fouls, and turning the ball over six times in just 26 minutes.Read more...

It’s no secret that Kawhi Leonard’s presence on the Raptors has vaulted the team from LeBron’s postseason punching bags to a potential conference championship contender. But OG Anunoby decided to show the Kings just how influential the former Defensive Player of the Year has been with his take on his teammate’s …Read more...

Arguably the most corrupt sporting body in the world announced on Wednesday that it would actively work against the potential creation of a breakaway European Super League. The announcement was in response to a report from Der Spiegel that showed clubs like Bayern Munich and Real Madrid were allegedly working with…Read more...

The Penguins and Capitals were tied 1-1 through 58 minutes of play tonight, but the real loser of the night already appeared to be Washington winger T.J. Oshie. Oshie found himself on the receiving end of a couple of hard knocks by Pittsburgh, which took him out of the game twice even though the poor guy was just…Read more...

Miami Heat big man Hassan Whiteside struggles at times and has had some trouble getting along with Erik Spoelstra and Pat Riley, particularly after last season’s playoffs when Riley publicly called out Whiteside’s readiness and conditioning. But there was no question whatsoever about Whiteside’s motivation and ability…Read more...

For exclusive videos, pictures, and more, like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter and Instagram. Send us your confidential tips at tips@deadspin.com, call our confidential tips hotline at (347) 746-8471, contact our writers directly, or use our anonymous SecureDrop system.Read more...

Interim coaches need to find some way to reach their players after having the responsibilities of a head coach suddenly thrust upon them during the season. Larry Drew’s approach to communicating with the Cavs is avian in its nature.Read more...

Vance Joseph is not a fan of Demaryius Thomas airing out his grievances to the media about how the Broncos disrespected and misled him throughout this season. Since beating the Broncos 19-17 with his new team, Thomas has been answering any and all questions about the organization’s ineptitude.Read more...

Edmonton Oilers bruiser Milan Lucic got hit with a $10,000 fine but no suspension by the NHL this afternoon, a day after he went after Lightning rookie Mathieu Joseph in the final period of a 5-2 Edmonton loss. With about 10 minutes remaining and the Oilers already down three, the veteran stalked the kid in his own…Read more...

Juventus had little trouble bossing Manchester United in the Champions League today. The Italian team was in control for the vast majority of the match and, if not for some shaky finishing, probably would’ve won with ease. But even during this struggle of a season, United manager José Mourinho proved he can still work…Read more...

When Donald Trump is dropping remarkable word-turds every single day, some of them will inevitably be lost with the passage of time. In the last two weeks alone the Big Wet President has renamed a simpering fatberg “Beautiful Ted,” and he’s asked every man in an audience of 6,000 to raise his hand and pledge, “You…Read more...

Jeff Sessions resigned today as Attorney General of the United States at the request of Donald Trump. The Lilliputian bigot, a former Alabama Senator better known as The Keebler Elf But Racist, will be replaced for now by chief of staff at the Justice Department Matt Whitaker, a hulking bald Iowan who will now oversee…Read more...

The Nuggets’ Nikola Jokic has been fined $25,000 for using the phrase “no homo” while discussing Wendell Carter, Jr.’s length, as NBA writer Sean Highkin reports.

We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.

According to the Washington Post, the University of Maryland today fired Steve Nordwall, assistant athletic director of athletic training, and Wes Robinson, the head trainer for the football program, after a lengthy paid leave for both men that began on Aug. 10, in the wake of reports about Terrapins football player…Read more...

In today’s match against Shakhtar Donetsk, Manchester City star Raheem Sterling did something incredibly embarrassing when he blew a very good scoring opportunity by tripping over his own feet. Luckily for him, the referee followed that blunder with an even more monumental failure of his own when he awarded Sterling…Read more...

Former WFAN host Craig Carton, who pled not guilty to fraud charges after he was arrested last September for scamming investors out of millions of dollars through a concert ticket-selling enterprise in order to pay off his gambling debts, was found guilty on all charges today, the New York Post reported. He faces up…Read more...

Pop culture gets absorbed by sports fairly quickly, but it has to travel light years farther to reach golf. That’s why some cruel person at the PGA is now making these senior tour pros try to recreate dances from Fortnite, the popular online video game that is also the reason you see all those kids flailing on the big…Read more...

Remember two days ago when Floyd Mayweather held an hour-long press conference in Tokyo to announce that he would be fighting 20-year-old kickboxing genius Tenshin Nasukawa in Japan on New Year’s Eve? Ha ha, it was all a misunderstanding, according to Mayweather, who announced in a lengthy Instagram post that he will…Read more...

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Iris Clawson, 84-year-old NBA superfan, spent some time on the trainer’s table.

Montgomery County (Md.) police have charged a quintet of junior varsity football players from Damascus High School with a variety of rape offenses after they allegedly assaulted two of their teammates with a broomstick and attempted to do the same to two others on Halloween night. Damascus is a powerhouse football…Read more...

The New York Times’ Andrew Keh has a nice profile of Leo Borg, son of legend Bjorn and one of Sweden’s most promising tennis prospects. As the article makes abundantly clear, Bjorn and his wife Patricia are concerned that their 15-year-old son has opted to follow his 11-time-major-winning father into tennis,…Read more...

USA Badminton, the sport’s national governing body, was first audited by the United States Olympic Committee three years ago. The USOC recommended stronger internal controls and improved reporting on its finances, among other fixes, and it awarded USA Badminton an audit rating of 11; a rating of 0 is ideal. Three…Read more...

The pestilential Wizards lost last night, again, bringing their record this season to a pitiful 2-8. Terminally unfunny center Dwight Howard—whose teammates universally cannot stand him—is back from a butt injury, and the Wizards are in such a sorry state of internecine bickering that Howard is the man who has been…Read more...

In modern NASCAR, the title comes down to four drivers and a 400-mile shootout in Florida. There’s only one race left before that shootout, and three days after driver Kevin Harvick secured himself a spot in it, he’s now lost his guarantee and sits at risk of playoff elimination—all thanks to a huge penalty.

Dez Bryant has finally found a team that’ll give him what he wants, and it’s a pretty good team, too. The New Orleans Saints have agreed to sign the former Cowboys receiver to a one-year deal for the rest of the season.Read more...

The 2018 midterms handed progressives a lot of crushing defeats, but there were still a few bright spots: all across the country, some of the worst racists, homophobes, and bigots of the Republican Party lost their elections. They probably feel pretty bad about themselves right now. Maybe they even cried?

In England, Halloween ends and gives way to November in various ways: Pumpkins left on doorsteps begin their neglected descent into rot; the seasonal coffee flavoring changes to gingerbread; James McClean begins receiving death threats from a certain brand of soccer fan, including among his own supporters.

The rivalry between Boca Juniors and River Plate, the two biggest clubs in Argentine soccer, is dubbed the Superclásico. This “Super” qualifier isn’t meant to imply that the game’s quality is typically better than Spain’s more heralded Clásico. Instead, it’s a reference to the fans, who are super-charged,…Read more...

Democrats have the House. Besides not passing horrific bills for a change, what should they do? They should start holding hearings on voter suppression. And they should keep on holding them.Read more...

It’s a phenomenal time to be a chess fan. We can follow live action from thousands of games all around the world on our phones, from elite super-tournaments to the smallest club competitions. Freely available learning and training resources by far supersede anything the famed Soviet system could ever have offered. The…Read more...