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Updated 2025-07-28 01:17
Reading Product Plugs From Joshua Tree Helped Me Understand My Industry's Twisted Heart
In November, Uproxx editorial director of music Caitlin White published “Breaking Up In Joshua Tree Helped Me Understand My Own Twisted Heart,” originally under the third-person headline “A Writer Finds Loss And Rebirth In A Road Trip To Joshua Tree.” The post was a true original, alternating intense and writerly…Read more...
Bumbling Package Thief Injures Leg, Is Rescued By Getaway Driver In Russell Wilson Jersey
Stealing packages seems like a scummy, straightforward two-person operation: One briskly walks up to the house, while the other keeps the car running. This one on Friday quickly fell apart due to an unforeseen variable: wet grass.Read more...
Baseball Executive Kevin Towers Dead At 56 Of Thyroid Cancer
Former Padres and Diamondbacks general manager Kevin Towers died Tuesday morning of thyroid cancer, which he was diagnosed with in late 2016. Towers was known as a popular and insightful executive, first entering the front office ranks as a scout before he became the Padres’ GM in 1995.
Forcing Hawks Fans To Try And Guard Hot Sauce Is Very Cruel And Very Funny
It can’t be easy coming up with new in-arena gimmicks to entertain NBA fans during stoppages in play—there is only one Red Panda to go around, after all—so kudos to the Atlanta Hawks for a new recurring segment in which street ball legend and AND1 Mixtape star Philip “Hot Sauce” Champion embarrasses people from the…Read more...
Man City Spend More Of Their Unlimited Money On Yet Another Wildly Expensive Defender
Manchester City are one of the biggest and most ambitious clubs in world soccer. In order to realize their silver-lined aspirations, they need lots and lots of money to invest in the team. Luckily for them, they have more money than god thanks to the backing of the Abu Dhabi royal family which owns the club—an…Read more...
John Wall Broken, Wizards Dead, Universe Empty
Washington Wizards guard John Wall will miss six to eight weeks for a “procedure to clean up” his sore left knee, the one that has now been interfering with his career on a dismally regular basis since at least as far back as 2012. In related news [long anguished scream, tapering away to silence].Read more...
Braun Strowman Continued Wrecking The WWE Raw Set
WWE has been in Philadelphia for the last few days, and things have been generally well-received. The card on Saturday included what some people are calling two of the best NXT matches ever. The Royal Rumble on Sunday included a men’s Rumble that people generally loved, and a first-ever women’s Rumble that was…Read more...
LPGAer And Frequent Trump Golf Partner: "He Cheats Like Hell"
Suzann Pettersen, with 15 LPGA Tour wins to her name, is also a good friend of Donald Trump. Has been for a decade. So when she talks about him being an inveterate cheater at golf, understand that she’s painting just about the most sympathetic picture possible of his game.
GizmodoArtificial Intelligence May Have Cracked Freaky 600-Year-Old Manuscript | KotakuShadow Of T
Gizmodo Artificial Intelligence May Have Cracked Freaky 600-Year-Old Manuscript | Kotaku Shadow Of The Colossus: The Kotaku Review | Jalopnik I Just Made My Final Car Payment And I Now Vow To Never Take Out A Car Loan Ever Again | The A.V. Club Netflix will just keep making Fuller House, and…Read more...
Boston Is So Embarrassing
By now you are surely aware of the fact that WEEI host Alex Reimer was suspended indefinitely after saying Tom Brady’s daughter was being an “annoying little pissant” in a scene of the first episode of Brady’s new Facebook reality show. He caught the ire of Brady, who went on WEEI and implied that Reimer’s comment…Read more...
Price Mistake: Shop at Banana Republic and Get $50 Off Orders of $50+
Banana Republic should be having a $50 off orders of $200+, but instead, if you use the code BRSHOP, you can get $50 off an order of $50+. Which means, if you play your cards right, you can make an order that’s nearly free.
Milwaukee Police Reviewing Officers' Arrest, Tasing Of Sterling Brown; Will Release Body Camera Footage
Milwaukee police announced on Monday that Bucks rookie Sterling Brown will not face any charges after being arrested for resisting arrest last week.Read more...
Fly Away
BOTCHAMANIA.Read more...
Wow, Do I Love The Explanation For This Hall Of Fame Ballot
There are few—if any?—genres of baseball writing that are more entertaining across the board than the Hall of Fame ballot explanation column. That’s not to say these columns are good; they usually aren’t, and they’re frequently the opposite. They’re often cranky or self-righteous or defensive, and yet they can be…Read more...
Oh Shit, The Clippers Traded Blake Griffin To Detroit
Blake Griffin will soon have a harder time getting guest appearances on Comedy Central shows, because according to Adrian Wojnarowski, the Clippers have traded Griffin to the Detroit Pistons in exchange for Tobias Harris, Avery Bradley, Boban Marjanovic, and a pair of picks.
A List Of People Accused Of Enabling Larry Nassar
Former USA Gymnastics and Michigan State doctor Larry Nassar was sentenced to 40 to 175 years in prison last week for 10 counts of first-degree criminal sexual conduct. Nassar was the only person sentenced, but dozens of other people have been accused of helping him perpetrate decades of child sexual abuse by…Read more...
Jaromir Jagr Is Leaving The NHL Again
Jaromir Jagr cleared waivers today, and the Calgary Flames announced that the 45-year-old winger would be moving on from the NHL and returning to the Czech Republic as a player on HC Kladno. Jagr, after waiting a long time for contract offers in the offseason, struggled with injuries in Calgary, and he’ll find a much…Read more...
How Esports Broadcasters Decide What You See
Gunfire, spells, commentators talking a mile a minute, momentum shifts, plays you can literally miss by blinking: there’s so much going on during esports events that there’s hardly any time to spare a thought for what’s going on behind the scenes, let alone what’s happening right in front of your eyes.
Report: Wyoming DA Won't File Charges Against Wrestlers Who Waterboarded Freshman Teammate
The Kelly Walsh High School (Wyo.) wrestlers accused of waterboarding their freshman teammate won’t be charged with any crimes, as Natrona County District Attorney Michael Blonigen said Thursday that while the actions did amount to hazing, he couldn’t press charges because of what he perceived to be the victim’s…Read more...
Report: Eric Wood's Retirement Delayed Due To Bonus Money Dispute
Buffalo Bills center Eric Wood, who was diagnosed with a career-ending neck injury in his season-ending physical, gave a weird press conference this afternoon in which, instead of announcing his retirement as expected, he showed up nearly an hour late and gave just a two-minute statement without answering any…Read more...
KotakuInfamous Atari Player Disqualified From World Record After 35 Years | JalopnikHow Goodyear H
Kotaku Infamous Atari Player Disqualified From World Record After 35 Years | Jalopnik How Goodyear Hid Evidence Of ‘The Worst Tire Made In History’ Linked To At Least 9 Deaths | Gizmodo Artificial Intelligence May Have Cracked Freaky 600-Year-Old Manuscript | Vitals How to Keep Strava From Telling Everyone Where You…Read more...
Enes Kanter's Fucked-Up Lip
Enes Kanter fucked up his lip and this is what it looks like.
I Think I Understand Sports Fans Now
Two winters ago, a high school pal whom I hadn’t seen in several years while he served in Afghanistan was back in New York, and, en route to a night of reconnecting over bowls of warm ramen, he abruptly ruined everything with a suggestion: Let’s go to a sports bar around the corner and watch the New York Giants.Read more...
The Antarctic Expedition That Included Alex Honnold Sounds Frigid And Terrifying
Antarctica is mostly known as a snowy wasteland, an island at the bottom of the world with nothing but ice and the odd penguin here and there. While it is covered in a few kilometers of ice, there is a continent underneath it all, and a rather mountainous one at that. Where there are mountains, there will inevitably…Read more...
Titus Young Writes About Hearing Voices, Living With Bipolar Disorder In Prison Diary
Former NFL and Boise State wide receiver Titus Young, a second-round pick who had his career cut short by clashes with coaches and teammates, is currently serving a sentence of four years in a Los Angeles prison for an assault on his neighbor. That assault is the culmination of a series of legal and off-field problems…Read more...
How to Keep Strava From Telling Everyone Where You Live
Sharing your running and cycling routes is the whole point of using Strava—you can see whether you’re the fastest in your neighborhood at climbing that big hill, or take on a friend’s favorite running route to see how you compare. But this weekend, analyst Nathan Ruser pointed out that the app’s heatmap of popular…Read more...
MLB Says Cleveland Indians Will Get Rid Of Chief Wahoo On Uniforms In 2019
The Cleveland Indians will no longer sport images of their racist mascot Chief Wahoo on team uniforms starting in 2019. Major League Baseball announced the change this morning, saying in a statement that the caricature was “no longer appropriate for use on the field.”
Lansky's Uber-Popular BladeMedic Is Back In Stock For $7
No matter how great your kitchen knives are, they all need some tender loving care from time to time. This $7 Lansky BladeMedic includes two v-sharpeners, a fold-out sharpening rod, and a ceramic sharpening edge for serrated knives, all in a handheld package that can fit into any kitchen drawer.
Report: Joakim Noah Fought With His Coach And Now The Knicks Want Him Gone
This bomb from Shams Charania was basically just a matter of turning subtext into text:
Report: Britt McHenry Is Fake News
Britt McHenry, who should really update her handwringing-about-rap shtick since N.W.A isn’t what the kids listen to anymore, was named this weekend in a New York Times report as one of the celebrities, “celebrities,” and media members who have purchased phony Twitter followers through a company called Devumi.…Read more...
The New XFL Should Have An Ooonnnkkk Horn, And Other New Football Rule Ideas
Last week, Vince McMahon announced the return of the XFL. Considering the quality of the original XFL and the track record of Vince McMahon’s non-wrestling ventures, there’s reason to wonder if this thing will ever happen.
Baby Will Definitely Grow Up To Be Hoagie-Loving Adult
Philadelphia is already out of control with Super Bowl fever, and this baby is no exception. This kid has likely heard the word “Eagles” 10 million times over the last few weeks, so why wouldn’t his first word be “Eagles”? The only thing that’s surprising is that he didn’t say “Go Birds.”Read more...
Male Gymnast Says He Was Abused By USAG Coach During Training
Andrew Fuller, a gymnast who competes in trampoline and tumbling events, has accused former USA Gymnastics coach Dr. George Drew of drugging and abusing him while Fuller was training in Michigan.
How Goodyear Hid Evidence Of 'The Worst Tire Made In History' Linked To At Least 9 Deaths
In October 2003, Billy Wayne Woods and his family packed into a luxury $181,000 motorhome for a fun getaway to Florida. Call it a textbook American vacation: their destination was Disney World, and with his wife, Shirley, his son and daughter-in law and two grandchildren in tow, the trip would surely be one to…Read more...
Sixers-Thunder Is Suddenly A Great NBA Rivalry
I doubt anyone had Sixers-Thunder pegged to become one of the spicier NBA rivalries headed into this season, but here we are, two games into the beef, with Russell Westbrook and Joel Embiid reaching new levels of petty.
Upgrade To a 65" 4K LG TV For Just $690
It’s not too late* to upgrade your TV for the large, popular sporting event happening this weekend, and you’d be hard pressed to find a better deal on a 65" 4K set than this $690 LG. It’s not their most high-end model, but it has solid reviews, HDR10 support (not Dolby Vision at this price, sorry), and oodles of…Read more...
Mark Dantonio And Tom Izzo Refuse To Accept Any Blame In MSU Sexual Assault Scandal
It’s been three days since an ESPN report painted a picture of Michigan State University as a school unable or unwilling to punish sexual abusers or rapists through any kind of accountable system, particularly when the accused were part of the football and men’s basketball teams. The looming publication of that report…Read more...
Tom Brady Cuts WEEI Interview Short Because Host Called His Kid An "Annoying Little Pissant"
It’s Super Bowl week and Tom Brady will ignore all off-the-field distractions. Almost. This morning, during his weekly appearance on a WEEI radio show featuring people who have repeatedly accused Adam Jones of fabricating the racist incidents he said he experienced in Boston, called Erin Andrews a “gutless bitch,” and…Read more...
Upgrade All of Your Lights With Smart Bulbs For Just $14 Each, No Hub Required
Anker makes smart light bulbs now, because of course they do, and you can get them at a discount today.
Ronda Rousey Signs Full-Time WWE Contract, Shows Up At Royal Rumble
The rumors are true: Ronda Rousey is leaving UFC for the slightly-more-scripted world of professional wrestling, as the former bantamweight champ turned up at the finale of tonight’s Royal Rumble event in Philadelphia to establish herself and a promised appearance at April’s Wrestlemania.Read more...
He's Broken In Half
OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!Read more...
Secret Military Installations Apparently Revealed By Snitch-Ass Fitness Tracking App
The Washington Post has a story today headlined “U.S. soldiers are revealing sensitive and dangerous information by jogging,” and it’s exactly what it sounds like: U.S. soldiers are revealing sensitive and dangerous information by jogging.Read more...
True Shit-For-Brains Spoils Tiger Woods Birdie Putt By Shouting "Get In The Hole"
Hey, jackass, how about letting the man actually finish his swing before you start shouting?Read more...
Report: Brett Favre Sued For $16 Million After Failed Launch Of Bullcrap Social Media Startup
Brett Favre is being sued for more than $16 million by Callais Capital Management for his role in marketing something called Sqor to eager investors. But what the hell is Sqor? It was a social media company in development, formed around the idea of helping athletes monetize their online selves. Callais contends that…Read more...
Poor Valparaiso Freshman Dunked Out Of Existence
Say a prayer for Valparaiso freshman Mileek McMillan, for surely he will never be seen again on earth after what happened to him Saturday night:
Rocket League Open Ends In Clutch Overtime Goal
Today’s grand finals between G2 and Paris Saint-Germain managed to go the full distance. It was the champs against the fresh-but-fierce PSG squad, and it all came down to a single goal in extra time.
Add Andre Roberson To The List Of Important NBA Players Lost To Season-Ending Injuries
Andre Roberson takes a lot of shit for being among the worst non-center shooters in the NBA, and for how that lack of shooting has, in the past, badly cramped the spacing for certain Oklahoma City Thunder lineups. Those inclined towards giving him shit will be relieved, then, to learn that he will be out for the…Read more...
Isaiah Thomas Is Having A Bad Time
Adrian Wojnarowski reported last week that at least one Cavs player “challenged the legitimacy” of an illness that kept Kevin Love from sticking around through the end of a game last Saturday, and then kept him out of practice on Sunday. Eventually that anonymous player was identified as Isaiah Thomas, who is having a…Read more...
Majin Obama And Tasty Steve Deliver A Passionate Fighting Game Sermon
Last night’s Guilty Gear Xrd REV 2 action at the inaugural Evo Japan was incredible, but it was the lead-up to the final match that really stuck with me. The commentators gave a surprisingly moving speech about the passion and dedication of the fighting game faithful, the culture of the community, and putting soul…Read more...
Steph Curry And Kyrie Irving Put On An Incredible Show
The Warriors narrowly edged the Celtics last night in Oakland, 109-105, in a game that was within a couple possessions most of the way. As if plucked directly from the hopes and wishes of fans sick to death of this stretch of NBA basketball being defined by injuries and conflict, the game Saturday night featured…Read more...
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