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Updated 2025-11-14 07:30
Markelle Fultz's Agent: Fultz's Shoulder Is All Fucked Up And Full Of Goop [Update]
Markelle Fultz has spent the start of his NBA career battling through a shoulder injury and shooting his free throws like someone throwing laundry into a hamper. He hasn’t played well, but that’s not much of a concern at all, since he is 19 and rookie point guards tend to be bad. What is concerning is that Fultz’s…Read more...
Perfect Your Pooping Technique With This $52 Bamboo Squatty Potty
Did you know you’ve been pooping all wrong? It’s true! Luckily, the obscenely popular Squatty Potty is designed to lift your legs into an ideal bowel movement position, and you can get a bamboo model on Amazon today. Although it more expensive than the usual plastic model, this one allows you to adjust to your optimal…Read more...
The Face Of Horror
A squirrel ran onto the field before today’s Manchester City-Wolves game. After the grounds crew chased it around for a while, they eventually managed to wrangle it.Read more...
NBA Fines Josh Jackson $35K For Making "Menacing" Gun Gesture At Fan
Phoenix Suns rookie Josh Jackson fouled out of Saturday’s blowout loss to the Clippers with six minutes left, and as he headed to the bench, he appeared to mime shooting a gun at a Clippers fan, before sitting down and mouthing “Fuck you.”
Lazio FC Will Wear Shirts With Anne Frank's Face To Combat Anti-Semitism
Serie A and Lazio FC announced they’ll be taking measures to counter anti-semitism at soccer matches. This decision was spurred by an incident this weekend in which Lazio supporters “defaced their Stadio Olimpico home in Rome with anti-Semitic graffiti and stickers showing images of [Anne] Frank ... wearing a jersey…Read more...
What Is The Best Pickle?
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we’re talking Penn State, airballs, butts, and more.
Have You Seen JuJu Smith-Schuster's Bike?
It’s been a rough week for Steelers rookie JuJu Smith-Schuster. Martavis Bryant is talking shit online about him, he’s landed in the concussion protocol, and now some rapscallion has made off with Smith-Schuster’s prized bicycle. This is bullshit! Give it back!
Bad Quarterback Performance Of The Week: Eli Manning Is Old And Alone
Welcome to Bad Quarterback Performance Of The Week, a recurring feature in which we celebrate the worst quarterback play the NFL has to offer.Read more...
Jim Boeheim Has Plenty Of Half-Thoughts On Why Colleges Players Shouldn't Get Paid
Jim Boeheim spoke with the press on Friday, per Syracuse.com, touching on Syracuse’s upcoming attempt to bounce back from a 19-15 NIT campaign, UNC’s last-minute dodging of NCAA penalties, and the fact that, actually, jersey sales aren’t really that high, so college athletes should probably be happy with their Pell…Read more...
This Big Slovak Kid Straight Up Wrecked The Famed Stars Of Napoli's Attack
Highlight reels in soccer often cull together the best moves of attacking players, and for good reason. Scoring is the most important thing you can do in the sport, dribbles and passes and shots are just more aesthetically pleasing than smart defensive positioning, etc. etc. That doesn’t mean the big lads at the back…Read more...
Scott Brooks's Acting Helped Earn Nikola Jokic A Technical Foul
With the Nuggets down five toward the end of last night’s game against the Wizards, Jamal Murray canned a three to make it a one-score game. As the Nuggets walked back to their bench following a Wizards timeout, Nikola Jokic grazed Scott Brooks with his elbow. Brooks immediately whirled around as if he’d been shot,…Read more...
Eagles Fans Brawl With Washington Fans, Each Other
The Eagles pulled away from Washington in the second half Monday night, although at halftime they only led by one touchdown. The competitive game didn’t stop a few fans from fighting early in the third quarter of the Eagles’ 34-24 win in Philly.Read more...
Browns QB Roulette Continues Apace After DeShone Kizer Apologizes For Going To Bar
The Cleveland Browns, who are once again a plague upon this green Earth, have spent the season flipping back and forth between a trio of QBs of varying mediocrity. DeShone Kizer, Kevin Hogan, and Cody Kessler have teamed up to throw seven touchdowns and 17 picks for a team that only figures to have more trouble…Read more...
Some Of The Times I Didn't Consent
When I was in high school, I let my guy friends shoot crumpled paper balls into my cleavage at lunch. I thought this made me cooler than the other girls, and that my ability to assimilate and remain sexualized was special. Besides, it was just a silly thing they did. It would be years before that memory soured, and I…Read more...
I Hope Dennis Smith Jr. Keeps Trying Big Dunks And Ruins Someone's Life
Dennis Smith Jr. is just 6-foot-2, but the audacious kind of 6-foot-2, the kind that wants to put the ball directly into the hoop no matter what bodies stand between him and it. There’s not a whole lot else going on in this Mavs roster, so it’s exhilarating when the rookie launches himself off the floorboards and…Read more...
That Was Carson Wentz's Breakout Party
Carson Wentz had a good rookie season, and he’s been playing great so far in his second year, but last night felt like a turning point. Maybe people put too much stock into players having big performances in nationally televised games—Doing It On The Big Stage, as it were—but Wentz looked like a superstar and maybe…Read more...
Henrik Lundqvist Really Blew It This Time
Hockey dude Henrik Lundqvist literally fell flat on his face on this play that gave the Sharks their fourth and final “goal” last night.
VitalsEverybody Is Lying About How to Flatten Your Belly | io9Marvel Already Has Plans For Two New
Vitals Everybody Is Lying About How to Flatten Your Belly | io9 Marvel Already Has Plans For Two New Thor: Ragnarok Characters Beyond the Movie | Kotaku The Nintendo Switch Now Supports GameCube Controllers | Jalopnik Five Little Car Things That Happen All The Time In Movies That Drive Me Insane | The A.V. Club …Read more...
Pistons Home Games Are Already Attendance Disasters
You know that sparkling new arena that Detroit and its citizens paid a hefty chunk of $863 million for? Yeah, nobody is going to games there.
This Is How Scary The Sixers Can Be
Joel Embiid vs. Andre Drummond was always going to be the real plot of the Sixers’ trip to Detroit, and in preparing for it, Embiid watched a lot of game tape and liked what he saw. “Defensively,” Embiid said of Drummond, “he doesn’t play any defense.”Read more...
Amazon Wants You To Finally Get A Good Cutting Board
Take the pack of three bamboo or plastic cutting boards you bought on a whim and throw them in the garbage. Or, at least order this awesome John Boos solid maple, reversible wooden cutting board and then throw your other crappy ones out when this arrives. At $70, it’s a worthwhile investment, but that price is gone by…Read more...
Indochino Is Launching Its Black Friday Suit Sale Early, Just For Our Readers [Exclusive]
Our readers have purchased thousands of custom-tailored suits over from Indochino the last few years, and as a result, they’re unlocking their Black Friday sale early, just for us. For a limited time, take your pick of 65 suit styles—most of which are part of their latest collection—for just $349 with promo code…Read more...
Carson Wentz Is A Damn Escape Artist
In the fourth quarter of tonight’s game against Washington, Philadelphia quarterback Carson Wentz showed off some seriously brilliant escapology. Houdini-esque, even:
Jordan Bell Tosses Alley-Oop To Himself Off The Backboard
True independence: It’s not moving out of your parents’ house or living off your own farm-grown sustenance or declaring that you, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the…Read more...
Former Iditarod Champ Dallas Seavey Revealed As Musher With Doping Dogs, Claims Someone Drugged Them "Maliciously"
Ready for some juicy sled dog racing drama featuring drugs, father-son competition, and accusations of malicious behavior???? Here you go!!Read more...
Ducks Forward Patrick Eaves Diagnosed With Rare Guillain-Barré Syndrome
Anaheim Ducks forward Patrick Eaves has been diagnosed with Guillain-Barré Syndrome, a rare condition in which the immune system attacks the body through the peripheral nervous system.Read more...
Kirk Cousins FaceTimed Into A Team Meeting While His Wife Was Giving Birth
Greg Bishop of Sports Illustrated published a Q&A with Washington quarterback Kirk Cousins today. He discusses his new workspace at the stadium, his experience golfing with Donald Trump and his perspective on the protests during the national anthem. He also discusses this, regarding the birth of his son last month:Read more...
Deadspin Up All Night: Down The Hill
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. No way the Dodgers don’t have this, we just have to wait.Read more...
Enjoy Tottenham Now While It Lasts
What a time it is to be a Tottenham fan!Read more...
Praise Shapo
With today’s first-round victory at Basel, Canadian wonderteen Denis Shapovalov has officially qualified for Milan, the new, strangely formatted “Next Gen” tournament intended to gin up interest in the rising cohort of men’s tennis stars. Only the top seven players 21 and under get to qualify, plus an Italian…Read more...
LifehackerHere’s What’s Coming and Going From Netflix in November 2017 | GizmodoIt Sounds Like Sna
Lifehacker Here’s What’s Coming and Going From Netflix in November 2017 | Gizmodo It Sounds Like Snap Spectacles Turned Into a Massive Boondoggle | Kotaku Rockstar Explains Why GTA V Never Got Single-Player DLC | Jalopnik It’d Be A Business Miracle If Tesla And Uber Succeed At All | The A.V. Club SNL’…Read more...
Miami's Jim Larranaga Admits He Was Mentioned In FBI's NCAA Investigation
Confirming what a great many expected, Miami head coach Jim Larranaga announced in a prepared statement Monday afternoon that he is “Coach-3" in the FBI’s investigation into the college basketball recruiting system.Read more...
Missing Hikers Found Dead Of Apparent "Compassionate Murder-Suicide"
This July, Rachel Nguyen and Joseph Orbeso went missing in Joshua Tree National Park in Southern California. The couple entered the park around 6:45 a.m. on July 27 and authorities realized something was amiss when they missed their check-out date the next day. Their car was found near the trailhead of the Maze Loop,…Read more...
Dolphins Cornerback Makes Big Play, Is Rewarded With Teammate's Vigorous Ass Slap
Dolphins cornerback Bobby McCain helped Miami snatch a win from the Jets when he picked off Josh McCown in the final minute of Sunday’s 31-28 victory. McCain’s prize for his efforts was a fierce butt smack, courtesy of fellow Dolphin Xavien Howard.
T.Y. Hilton Apologizes For Correctly Pointing Out His Teammates Suck
The Indianapolis Colts lost 27-0 to the Jaguars on Sunday, and in the process allowed quarterback Jacoby Brissett to be sacked 10 times. The Colts have been losing games like this for awhile now, because the organization does not seem to believe in employing competent offensive lineman, and after the game receiver…Read more...
Megan Rapinoe Calls FIFA "Old, Male, And Stale" After Awards Controversy
Following the bizarre nomination of an amateur player for FIFA’s female Player of the Year award, USWNT and Seattle Reign midfielder Megan Rapinoe has criticized soccer’s governing body, calling them “old, male and stale” in an interview with BBC.Read more...
ESPN Cancels Barstool Sports TV Show After One Episode
ESPN has pulled the plug on PFT Commenter and Dan Katz’s weekly show Barstool Van Talk after just one episode. (The next episode would have been scheduled to air Wednesday morning at 1 a.m. ET.)Read more...
Turkish Prime Minister Orders Investigation Into Rocky Balboa Tifo
When Galatasaray SK took to the pitch yesterday for its match against Fenerbahce, fans unveiled a pre-game tifo featuring beloved fictitious Philadelphia boxing legend Rocky Balboa. Now Binali Yildirim, Turkey’s prime minister, has ordered an investigation into the Rocky tifo.Read more...
A Warriors Consultant Explains How High Fives Help Win Basketball Games
In an age of unprecedented analytics across sports, it’s getting increasingly difficult for teams to hone in on untapped avenues for optimization. It’s possible, then, that the Golden State Warriors have reached final frontier of quantification by bringing in renowned UC-Berkeley Social Psychologist, Dacher Keltner,…Read more...
What Is The Athletic's Plan Beyond Exterminating Newspapers?
If you aren’t a reader of The Athletic, a subscription-based and regionally focused conglomeration of sports sites, then you’ve probably at least heard of them after they went on a massive hiring spree and loaded up on writers who fell victim to layoffs that swept through the industry. They’ve grown rapidly over the…Read more...
Ray Knight Charged With Assault And Battery
Two-time All-Star, 1986 World Series MVP, and current Washington Nationals TV analyst Ray Knight was arrested for assault and battery over the weekend, according to the Fairfax County Police Department. Police say that officers were called to Knight’s home at 4:00 a.m. on Sunday after an argument between Knight and a…Read more...
The 11 Scariest Video Game Ghosts Ever
From Pac-Man’s eternal pursuers all the way up to F.E.A.R.’s terrifying Alma Wade, games have always been full of ghosts, phantasms, phantoms, and other assorted ethereal fiends. In celebration of Kotaku Spooky Week, I consulted the Kotaku staff and we put together this definitive ranking of the scariest ghosts ever…Read more...
Monitor Seven Different Fitness Indicators With This $51 Device
If you’re serious about health and fitness, this body composition monitor can give you a detailed analysis of your body without going to the doctor’s office.Read more...
Well, That's Probably It For Eric Bledsoe In Phoenix
Yesterday, Suns guard Eric Bledsoe sent one of the best athlete tweets in history:
Markelle Fultz Says Be More Like An Egg
Struggling (and visibly injured) Sixers rookie Markelle Fultz is in what one might call “hot water.” Through three losses and 59 minutes of run, the first overall pick has shot 34 percent from the field, bricked half his free throws with toddler form, taken just six shots from beyond nine feet, and hasn’t even…Read more...
Surprise, Vontaze Burfict Kicked A Guy [Update]
Bengals linebacker Vontaze Burfict and the Steelers renewed acquaintances Sunday, and it took all of 43 seconds of game time for Burfict to do something that may warrant another suspension. Even for Burfict, that’s pretty efficient.Read more...
Random Dude Wins Venice Marathon After Leaders Directed Wrong Way
An Italian man won the Venice Marathon yesterday when the leaders of the race were accidentally directed the wrong way on the course.
The Cowboys' Safety Had To Replace Their Kicker And He Wasn't That Bad
Cowboys defensive back Jeff Heath, best known for almost decapitating a guy on the football field, was a kicker for Lake Orion High School (Mich.), and once hit a dramatic, game-winning 49-yard field goal. When Dan Bailey hurt his groin in Sunday’s game against the 49ers, Heath had to fill in.
Neymar Says Getting Pelted With Baguettes Did Not Make Him Lose His Cool
After PSG’s 2-2 draw against Marseille on Sunday, in which Neymar was sent off in the final minutes for drawing a second yellow card, the Brazilian complained about Marseille fans pelting him with food and beverages, but denied it provoked him to commit a foul.Read more...
Artemi Panarin's Dog Is The World's Cutest Forechecker
Practicing stickhandling can be a dull, repetitive exercise for any hockey player. But Columbus Blue Jackets winger Artemi Panarin, who’s already extremely good with the puck, has found a way to make it the highlight of anyone’s day.
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