Eastway Emitter R4 bike review – ‘The saddle is an instrument of torture’

Unisex invariably means a saddle designed to accommodate testicles

There are a great many reasons why I struggled to keep up with one of the world's top women's cycling teams when I chased them around Mallorca. Most were my own fault: my lack of athleticism and undisciplined diet, plus a swollen elbow after I fell off outside the hotel after not fixing on my pedals properly.

But I also blame the Fizik Aliante saddle, an instrument of torture that comes with Eastway's Emitter R4. It isn't normal to struggle to pee after a 55-mile ride because your bits have been compacted tighter than a rush hour tube train. That's my excuse for getting dropped by Dani King, anyway, when I joined the Olympic gold medallist and her Wiggle High5 team on a winter training camp.