Hey, personality quiz, what if I want to use a sauna and be introverted? | Fay Schopen

We're fascinated by what quizzes might show us about ourselves, but being human means being unpredictable - doesn't it?

Are you a quiz taker? Do you yearn to "build a boyfriend" in order to discover your favourite Starbucks drink? Because presumably you have no idea what that might be. Or perhaps you want something more sophisticated, such as Buzzfeed's incisive "Which ousted Arab Spring ruler are you?" (really).

Know thyself, they say. And so personality quizzes appeal to even the most cynical of us. Because, let's face it, we're narcissists. We love hearing more about the most fascinating, yet strangely unknowable, person we will ever meet: ourselves. Why do we do the things we do? Why, for example, did I go all the way to the British Library yesterday, and then, surrounded by 150m or so literary splendours, spend two hours perusing the Daily Mail's sidebar of shame? Truly, 'tis a mystery.