Donald Trump desperately needs Twitter. But will he ever be able to beat his ban? | Arwa Mahdawi

Trump has handled his social media exile with all the grace one would expect - and now he's pathetically grovelling for the chance to tweet

Did you get a bit antsy on Monday when Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp went down? Did you feel the terrible tremors of an addict forced to go cold turkey? If so then please spare a thought for how torturous this year has been for poor old Donald Trump. The 75-year-old social media junkie has been banned from all his favourite platforms since January, when he was accused of inciting and applauding a violent insurrection. Different sites handed out different punishments: Trump was put in Facebook jail for at least two years with a chance of parole; Twitter, on the other hand, has said there isn't a hope in hell he's getting his account back. Not even if he becomes president again.

Trump has handled his social media exile with all the grace one would expect from him. And, to be fair, I can understand why the belligerent billionaire is confused by the fact that he has been told he is not allowed to do something. How could it be possible, after all, that a rich white man be banned from doing anything, let alone something he enjoys? It goes against all the rules of nature! Well, you'll be glad to know that Trump is on a mission to right all that and make his social media life great again. On Friday, the former president begged a federal judge in Florida to grant an injunction that would make the losers and haters at Twitter reinstate his @realDonaldTrump account while he fights the company's permanent ban. This guy used to be the most powerful man in the world; now he's pathetically grovelling for a chance to tweet. It would be hilarious if it wasn't also a sobering reminder of the immense power big tech has.

Arwa Mahdawi is a Guardian columnist