No one should have to bear the online abuse I received while fighting ‘upskirting’ | Gina Martin

I helped get the law changed in 2019 but at great personal cost. But there is still so much work to be done

I remember the first violent message I received on Instagram. It was a veritable bingo of hate: he mocked me, told me no one would want to look at my dirty" crotch - though his language was worse, of course. He asked if sluts" like me, moaning until they get what they want", was what our country was coming to", before reminding me that nothing was going to change. He finished by saying he hoped I was gang-raped senseless" by 20 men. But, he didn't use the word men". He used a racist slur instead, finishing the message with five middle-finger emojis. I remember how my chest tightened and I grew hot with fear.

That day had marked my first appearance on a big, mainstream television channel. I was three months into a campaign I'd launched to raise awareness about non-consensual upskirt photographs, something that I'd fallen victim to that summer at a music festival. While I waited patiently for a band to come on stage, a man had stuck his hands between my legs, up my skirt and taken photos of my crotch, sharing it with his friends around him. I heard laughter and sensed that they were looking at me. One of the guys was standing in front of me, head down, laughing at something on his phone. I looked around his back and saw he was on WhatsApp, looking at a picture of my crotch. I was standing in the middle of a crowd of tens of thousands, but somehow I managed to snatch the phone from his hands and run through the throngs of people to security.

Gina Martin is a campaigner and writer. She will be part of a Guardian Live panel event to discuss tackling the online abuse of women on Wednesday 9 February, 8pm GMT. Book tickets here