What $90 and 90 minutes can buy you at the CNE: rides, games, weird food and fun
The last two years plus have been rough. Real rough.
So, on Friday, as the Canadian National Exhibition opened its gates for the first time since 2019, the Star gave three staff members $90 and 90 minutes. Their mission: just have fun.
Here's what they did, how they spent their money and where they landed on the fun meter.
Demar Grant
My fun mission: My goal at the CNE was twofold. It was my first time attending in my adult life, so I wanted stuff - and lots of it - to make up for lost time. Also, my niece's birthday party is this weekend and what better way to secure a gift than crushing strangers in the great game that is Whack-A-Mole? I could have easily bought stuff outright to ensure I walked away with some plush, but then there'd be no thrill, no risk.
The CNE is also home to weird foods and it wouldn't be a complete day without a taste test of something off the wall.
My 90 minutes: The first thing I did after stepping through the Princes' Gates was get a caricature drawing of myself. (The goal, again, stuff.)
It was at least 20 minutes sitting in the chair waiting for artist Natalie Hume to do her work, but it came out brilliantly.
Next, a trip on Sky Ride, which moves from one end of the grounds to the other. It's an excellent way to get a scenic view of the festivities, which can seem endless from ground level. As we disembarked it was merely steps away from ice cream in a fruit. Luckily, there wasn't a line and I got pineapple and raspberry ice cream with coconut shavings inside of a pineapple.
Then it was game time. First, Whack-A-Mole, where I was able to beat a series of strangers, but also my Star colleague Ben Cohen, securing my first prize of the day, a unicorn with a pink horn.
Next we played a game where we used airsoft guns to shoot pop cans. I was given seven shots to knock as many cans from wooden planks as possible.
For this I stepped back to think. These are carny games. Even though the cans were beat up and bent, surely they were tougher to knock over than a typical can. I took my time to look at all the cans and grabbed a gun all the way at the end of the table. I aimed at a can that was a little further back than the others.
One shot, one can.
I still had six more shots and hit with some of them, but my assumptions were right: they barely moved. Still, I got my second prize: a red and yellow dog with blue eyes.
To finish my fun mission, it was time for food. I grabbed a pulled pork grilled cheese and a blue raspberry slushy.
My $90:
$30 Caricature
$12 Ice cream in a fruit
$8 Whack-A-Mole
$20 Airsoft shooting game
$7 Ride tickets
$11 Pulled pork grilled cheese
$5 Blue raspberry slushy
What I enjoyed most: Winning. Few things feel better. Winning Whack-A-Mole without missing a single mole was like entering the zone and seeing things in slow motion.
What I could have done without: The ketchup ice cream. It was absolutely dreadful. Imagine a ketchup bottle without shaking it and just drinking the liquid that pools at the top.
Fun meter rating: A lot of fun
Ben Cohen
My fun mission: I've never been to the CNE, so I felt I ought to try a bit of everything. A ride, some of the unique food offerings, a game or two.
But then I noticed much of the food seemed deliberately disgusting. The ketchup ice cream I was goaded into trying now festers in the trash, where it belongs.
And the rides seemed exciting, but with Exhibition safety inspectors striking, now didn't seem like the best time to try them all. (The CNE says it ensured the rides are safe despite the ongoing strike.) I tried a couple, but opted to focus my attention elsewhere.
My 90 minutes: I spent a lot of time with the games littering the Exhibition grounds. I like a challenge and the games offered a chance to win cute prizes I knew would make a nice surprise for my partner.
First, I played Whack-A-Mole for $8. I lost to Demar. He walked off with a unicorn, I walked off dejected.
I saw a terrific looking giant stuffed frog hanging off a dart game stall and made a beeline for it. I asked a man behind the counter how I could win it. He was frank with me; it would take about $60 to earn the frog. I walked off.
Turns out, while some of the games accept debit, most are cash only, which whittled down my options considerably. But lineups were non-existent at the games. Once I'd found a spot, I had all the time I needed to score a prize.
I next tried a $21 airgun game that had me firing corks into beat-up beer and soda cans. The corks spat out of the guns with such little force that the cans would not fall, despite my consistently hitting my targets.
Still, I won a floppy eared little bear or rabbit type creature. It's spring green and adorable. My girlfriend will love it.
Finally, after being rejected from cash-only free throw shooting and cash-only Skee-Ball, my colleague Madison Wong and I found a nerf gun target shooting table that took plastic.
I paid $20 for seven shots out of a nerf crossbow. I think I only missed two. My prize was a lime green monkey with a long, poseable tale and a frightening smirk.
My $90:
$7 Sky Ride and Star Dancer tickets
$7 Strawberry lemonade
$8 Whack-A-Mole
$12.65 Blue slushie and cotton candy
$21 Cork shooting
$15.26 Lick's HomeBurger and Nestea
$20 Nerf shooting
What I enjoyed most: Winning that floppy rabbit-bear toy. Even though I could have probably bought more stuffed animals for the price I paid for this one, a story like the one it will have is invaluable. I won it by testing my mettle in an accuracy competition and am bringing it home to my partner like a hunting trophy. Some primal itch has been scratched. Satisfying.
What I could have done without: Seeing Lick's HomeBurgers in the Food Building was startling. I thought the chain was long dead. I thought it was a very entertaining, tasty joint as a kid. Zombie Lick's at the CNE is fine, but the burger and bun were a bit burnt. Didn't match up with my memory.
Fun meter rating: Fun
Madison Wong
My mission: To get the most food with $90, from new, innovative eats to classic Midway snacks. Why? Because it's not often you get handed $90 to eat whatever you choose.
My 90 minutes: Before eating my way into CNE happiness, I decided to hop on some rides to avoid any potential of upsetting my stomach after one too many deep-fried Mars chocolate bars.
Demar, Ben and I went on the Sky Ride and then, shortly after, Ben and I decided to take on the Star Dancer ride, which we waited about 10 minutes to get on. This surprisingly thrilling ride swings you back and forth on claw-machine-like seats that rotate as the ride brings you up and down.
After feeling the adrenalin from rides, I was ready to eat.
My first stop was to try the ice cream in fruit and mini Nutella and strawberry pancakes. Luckily, the two booths were beside each other so, after placing my orders at the same time, sweets craving satisfied.
To give my stomach a break to digest, I decided to hit a few booth games down the Midway. After winning a purple flamingo prize competing against Ben in the shooting game, I felt confident.
I tried for a skeeball prize and, while I hit a couple of 40-slots, I walked away empty-handed.
Leaving the Midway, the ketchup and mustard-flavoured ice cream booth caught my eye. After all, it has been the talk of this year's CNE treats. I waited about 10 minutes for my ketchup ice cream cone, served in a waffle cone with a fry for esthetic presentation. In no time, I was running to the lemonade stand to wash the disgusting taste off my tongue.
Last stop: the Food Building, where I was overwhelmed with vendors and the smells of everything sweet and deep fried. After being indecisive and making my way down the crowded aisles, I decided to get two dozen Tiny Tom doughnuts - because who goes to the CNE without grabbing some of those delightful mini pastries?
I also decided to try the very colourful and sweet rainbow slime candy that has been all over Instagram and I couldn't leave without my go-to CNE treat: a deep-fried Mars bar.
How did you spend your money?
$10 Ketchup ice cream cone
$12 Ice cream in fruit
$12 Nutella and strawberry mini pancakes
$5 Skee-Ball booth game
$10 Shoot the targets booth game
$5 Rainbow slime candy
$5 Regular sized lemonade
$7 Ride tickets
$14 Tiny Tom doughnuts
$10 Deep-fried Mars bar
What I enjoyed most: Aside from the nostalgia of the Sky Ride, it was the ice cream in a fruit. I had the watermelon bowl with a raspberry and pineapple twist soft-serve, topped off with mini chocolate chips. The ice cream was absolutely delicious and refreshing under the beaming sun. Eating and drinking right from a fruit gives off the perfect summer energy and the flavours boost your serotonin.
What I could have done without: The ketchup-flavoured ice cream cone. For $10, even if it had been tasty, the presentation did not make it look appetizing. I do like ketchup-flavoured chips and the condiment overall with fries and burgers, but I know now there is no reason to mix it with dairy and serve it in a cone.
Fun meter rating: A lot of fun
Demar Grant is a Toronto-based staff reporter for the Star. Reach Demar via email: dgrant@torstar.ca
Ben Cohen is a Toronto-based staff reporter for the Star. Follow him on Twitter: @bcohenn
Madison Wong is a Toronto-based digital producer for the Star. Reach her via email: madisonwong@thestar.ca