To my friend who worries about becoming a parent: here are some things to hold on to | Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett

These are the things I wish I had said to you when you asked me if being a parent was as awful as it sounded

I decided to write this column in the format of a letter. I wanted to set myself the writing challenge of citing some of the many positive things about having a baby without being saccharine, resorting to cliche or generalising, and the only way I could find was this way. It's addressed to one person, but I hope that those who find themselves at a similar crossroads take succour from it.

To my friend A,

Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett is a Guardian columnist and author