Values we teach our kids change – but good manners are timeless | Joanna Moorhead

We no longer expect blind obedience from our children, but if we teach them to be curious about the world and tolerant of each other, then good manners will follow

Do as you're told! As a child growing up in the 1960s and 70s, I seemed to hear that phrase all the time; these days, it's rare to hear parents or teachers utter it. So it was no surprise to read last week that the importance we put on our children being obedient has, according to the World Values Survey, plummeted in the past 30 years. The proportion of Britons who think children should be brought up to be obedient is now 12%, down from 42% in 1990.

What we value in our kids these days, is, apparently, hard work" which is up from 29% to 48% over the same period. Imagination", is up from 18% to 37%, and determination and perseverance", from 31% to 41%. But in some values, we remain roughly the same through the decades: about 85% of British adults see good manners in children as especially important - that's only slightly lower than 1990 - and as for being unselfish, 43% of us value it highly in children, second only to France where the figure is 45%.