We need rituals to help ease the pain of unwanted periods | Nell Frizzell

When you're hoping to be pregnant, the arrival of your period calls for a condolence card, a sunrise walk - or a good scream

I am currently having my 10th unwanted period in a row. There are all sorts of reasons a period might be unwanted: you are on a long train journey; you had a period two weeks ago; you are camping; it's your wedding day, you are wearing white and Don't Stop Me Now has just come on across the dancefloor. In this case, however, I had hoped to be pregnant.

When it comes to unwanted periods - particularly the ones that remind you that your womb is made like an outbuilding or a shed - I would like to see some better rituals. Better cards. Better parties. A friend could arrive at your house with a box of eggs and take you to the nearest wood or car park, where you could spend a cathartic 10 minutes throwing the eggs at a wall, or a tree trunk, or the ground, while screaming.