Worried about naming your baby? Don’t be | Zoe Williams

Whether you settle on Mathilda, Deke or Ebenezer, it's bound to be exactly the right name. My own son is living proof

People who are expecting a baby spend an incredible amount of time talking about what to call it. This is probably a diversion away from difficult questions, such as: What if I'm bad at being a parent, and society shuns me?" or: What if this ruins our relationship, which is currently very beautiful?" As such, the naming debate is a brilliant one. The rest is way too hard.

Newsflash, though: it doesn't actually matter what you call your child. The baby is bigger than the word. As soon as that is its name, that is its only possible name. For ages, you'll think your baby is the one true carrier of the name, and everyone else called Mathilda is faking it.

Zoe Williams is a Guardian columnist