Think Apple’s Vision Pro headset makes you look like Neo in The Matrix? Sorry, you so don’t | Emma Brockes

Trying them out, I felt like a cyber hero but my kids doubled up with laughter. It's a $4,000 way to shred your dignity

The first thought I had, as I put on the Apple Vision Pro headset, was that I was somehow going to fail at virtual reality. For 20 minutes I'd watched as people with appointments ahead of me at the Apple store pinched the air, interacting with invisible stimuli. They looked ridiculous in the manner of mature adults trying to adopt new technology - all right, Grandma - which triggered my second, even more geriatric thought: what if there was a fire while you were in one of these things and you didn't notice and burned to death?

In fact, the most startling thing about the release of Apple's new virtual reality headset in the US last week was the nationwide scramble to book appointments for a demo, and with it, the opportunity to spend almost $4,000. The Vision Pro won't be available in the rest of the world for some time and, while Apple hasn't released sales figures, pre-orders were said to be somewhere between 160,000 and 180,000 during the first pre-order weekend.

Emma Brockes is a Guardian columnist