‘Lol, No’ Is The Perfect Response To LAPD’s Nonsense ‘IP’ Threat Letter Over ‘Fuck The LAPD’ Shirt

We've had plenty of posts discussing all manner of behavior from the Los Angeles Police Dept. and/or the LAPD union here at Techdirt. As you might imagine if you're a regular reader here, the majority of those posts haven't exactly involved fawning praise for these supposed crimefighters. In fact, if you went on a reading blitz of those posts, you might even come away thinking, You know what? Fuck the LAPD!"

Well, if you wanted to display your sentiments while you went about your day, you might go over to the Cola Corporation's website to buy one particular shirt it had on offer there before they completely sold out.

Now, it's not uncommon for misguided entities to issue intellectual property threat letters over t-shirts and apparel, even when it is of the sort that is obviously fair use. Given that, you might have thought it would be the Los Angeles Lakers that sent a nastygram to Cola Corp. After all, the logo in question is clearly a parody of the LA Lakers logo.

Nope!

It was the Los Angeles Police Foundation via its IMG representatives. The LAPF is something of a shadow financier of the LAPD for equipment, including all manner of tech and gear. We have no idea how an entertainment agency like IMG got in bed with these assbags, but it was IMG sending the threat letter you can see below, chock full of all kinds of claims to rights that the LAPF absolutely does not and could not have.

If you can't see that, it's a letter sent by Andrew Schmidt, who represents himself as the Senior Counsel to IMG Worldwide, saying:

RE: Request to Remove Infringing Material From www.thecolacorporation.com
Dear Sir/Madam:

I am writing on behalf of IMG Worldwide, LLC (IMG"), IMG is the authorized representative of Los Angeles Police Foundation CLAPF) LAPF is one of two exclusive holders of intellectual property rights pertaining to trademarks, copyrights and other licensed indicia for (a) the Los Angeles Police Department Badge; (b) the Los Angeles Police Department Uniform; (c) the LAPD motto To Protect and Serve"; and (d) the word LAPD" as an acronym/abbreviation for the Los Angeles Police Department (collectively, the LAPD IP"). Through extensive advertising, promotion and the substantial sale of a full range of licensed products embodying and pertaining to the LAPD IP, the LAPD IP has become famous throughout the world; and as such, carries immeasurable value to LAPF.

We are writing to you regarding an unauthorized use of the LAPD IP on products being sold on your website, www.thecolacorporation.com (the Infringing Product"). The website URL and description for the Infringing Product is as follows:
https://www.thecolacorporation.com/products fack-the- lupd pos-1&sid=435934961&&variant=48461787234611 FUCK THE LAPD
For the avoidance of doubt, the aforementioned Infringing Product and the image associated therewith are in no way authorized or approved by LAPF or any of its duly authorized representatives.

This letter hereby serves as a statement that:

1. The aforementioned Infringing Product and the image associated therewith violate LAPF's rights in the LAPD IP
2. These exclusive rights in and to the LAPD IP are being violated by the sale of the Infringing Product on your website at the URL mentioned above;
3. [Contact info omitted]
4. On information and belief, the use of the LAPD IP on the Infringing Products is not authorized by LAPF, LAPF's authorized agents or representatives or the law.
5. Under penalty of perjury, I hereby state that the above information is accurate and I am duly authorized to act on on behalf of the rights holder of the intellectual. property at issue I hereby request that you remove or disable access the above-mentioned materials and their corresponding URL's as they appear on your services in as expedient a manner as possible.

So, where to begin? For starters, note how the letter breezily asserts copyright, trademark, and other licensed indicia" without ever going into detail as to what it thinks it actually holds the rights to? That's an indicia" of a legal threat that is bloviating, with nothing to back it up. If you know what rights you have, you clearly state them. This letter does not.

If it's a copyright play that the LAPF is trying to make, it's going to go absolutely nowhere. The use is made for the purposes of parody and political commentary. It's clearly fair use, and there are plenty of precedents to back that up. Second, what exactly is the copyright claim here? It's not the logo. Again, if anything, that would be the Lakers' claim to make. The only thing possibly related to the LAPD would be those letters: LAPD. And, no, the LAPD does not get to copyright the letters LAPD.

If it's a trademark play instead, well, that might actually work even less for the LAPF, for any number of reasons. Again, this is parody and political commentary: both First Amendment rights that trump trademarks. More importantly, in trademark you have the question of the likelihood of confusion. We're fairly sure the LAPF doesn't want to make the case that the public would be confused into thinking that the Los Angeles Police Foundation was an organization that is putting out a Fuck the LAPD" t-shirt. Finally, for there to be a trademark, there has to be a use in commerce. Is the LAPF selling Fuck the LAPD" t-shirts? Doubtful.

But that's all sort of besides the point, because the LAPF doesn't have the rights IMG asserted in its letter. Again, the only possible claim that the LAPF can make here is that it has ownership to the letters LAPD. And it does not. Beyond the fact that it had no creative" input into LAPD, the LAPD is a city's law enforcement agency and you cannot copyright or trademark such a thing. And, as we've discussed multiple times in the past, government agencies don't get to claim IP on their agency names. The only restrictions they can present are on deceptive uses of logos/seals/etc.

But that is clearly not the case here. And we already have some examples from a decade ago of government agencies demanding the removal of parody logos and... it not ending very well for the government.

So, what is actually happening here is that the LAPF/LAPD (via IMG) is pretending it has the right to screw with private citizens in ways it absolutely does not, and is using those false rights to harass those private persons with threatening behavior to intimidate them into doing what the LAPF wants. Which, if I'm being totally honest here, is certainly on brand as roughly the most police-y thing it could do in response to a simple t-shirt that is no longer even for sale.

Now, you might imagine that the Cola Corporation's own legal team would reply to the silly threat letter outlining all of the above, crafting a careful and articulate narrative responding to all the points raised by the LAPF, and ensuring that their full legal skills were on display.

Instead, the company brought on former Techdirt podcast guest, lawyer Mike Dunford, who crafted something that is ultimately even better.

If you can't read that, you're not missing much. It says:

Andrew,

Lol, no.

Sincerely,
Mike Dunford

Perfect. No notes. May it go down in history alongside Arkell v. Pressdam, or the infamous Cleveland Browns response to a fan complaining about paper airplanes, as the perfect way to respond to absolutely ridiculous legal threat letters.

For what it's worth, Dunford's boss, Akiva Cohen, noted that this letter was a fun one to edit." We can only imagine.

This was a fun one to edit

[image or embed]

- AkivaMCohen (@akivamcohen.bsky.social) Apr 18, 2024 at 2:47 PM