Sara loved her baby. So why was she caught up in guilt, anxiety and resentment? | Barbara Rysenbry

Like countless other new parents, Sara had sailed straight into the iceberg' of unrealistically high expectations

• The modern mind is a column where experts discuss mental health issues they are seeing in their work

When I saw Sara* had booked to see me again I was wondering how things had been going with her new baby, who I expected would have been about six months old at this point. It was now August and I had initially seen Sara for a few sessions a year earlier when she had been struggling with the death of a close friend who lived in the UK.

At that time, apart from the grief she was experiencing, all appeared otherwise to be going well in Sara's life. She was in a loving and supportive relationship with Matt, her husband of four years, and was enjoying a successful, though sometimes stressful, career as a recruitment consultant.