Feminism taught me all I need to know about men like Trump and Putin | Rebecca Solnit

Like all abusive men, dictators seek to control who can speak and which narratives are believed. The only difference is scale

As the Russian invasion of Ukraine unfolded, I was reminded over and over again of the behaviour of abusive ex-husbands and boyfriends. At first he thinks that he can simply bully her into returning. When it turns out she has no desire to return, he shifts to vengeance.

Putin insisted that Ukraine was rightfully part of Russia and didn't have a separate existence. He expected his army to grab and subjugate with ease, even be welcomed. Now his regime seems bent on punitive destruction - of energy infrastructure, dwellings, historic sites, whole cities - and rape, torture and mass murder. This too is typical of abusers: domestic-violence homicides are often punishment for daring to leave.