Help, I’m obsessed with pressure-washing Lara Croft’s house | Ellie Gibson

I started playing a video game about cleaning for a laugh - now it's all gotten out of hand and I'm going for the Guinness World Record

Are video games better than sex? That's the sort of ludicrous question that is only posed by someone who has never had sex, or is searching for an attention-grabbing way to open an article about a cleaning simulator. However, I will say this: last week I had the opportunity to have it off but I played PowerWash Simulator instead, and honestly I'm not sure I had a worse time.

Maybe it's to do with age. Like every middle-aged female gamer I know, I love Lara Croft. Back in my younger days I lost entire evenings, weekends, and the best part of an English literature degree to Tomb Raider. But now I'm 45 and, for the most part, I have swapped late-night gaming sessions for going to bed after I've read the kids stories. I'll still be awake at 2am, but only because I've woken up in a cold sweat trying to remember where I put my Nectar card.