Parents of Brantford girl Grace McSweeney who died by suicide still waiting for answers
Warning: This story is about suicide. Resources for those who need help are listed at the bottom of this story.
One year has passed since 12-year-old Grace McSweeney killed herself after being bullied at school.
Yet, the Grand Erie District School Board still hasn't made good on its promise to review the circumstances that led to her death.
Our internal review is ongoing," spokesperson Dave Smouter said in an email.
Nobody from the board has interviewed Grace's parents. Nor has the board told her parents who is leading the review, what the scope of the review is, when it began or when it is expected to conclude.
Nobody will talk to us," says Jeremy Krentz, Grace's stepfather.
They push us aside or give us some sort of excuse," says her mother, Lauren Smith.
Grace was a Grade 7 student at Bellview Public School in Brantford. She died on March 29, 2022 after overdosing on Tylenol. Her death was ruled a suicide.
Grace was smart and funny and creative and talented.
She was also tall and heavy and depressed and gay.
She was bullied all her life.
Staff at the school knew it. Grace's parents had reported problems many times.
Grace had too.
But in the weeks leading up to her death, she gave up. Angry and bitter, she vented to a friend over the instant messaging app Snapchat in a March 2 conversation that Lauren and Jeremy retrieved after Grace's death. Here's an excerpt:
Grace: I went to (the former school principal) almost everyday because i was getting bullied. She didn't do jack s--t
Friend: Like school is somewhere were you can feel save but you can't
Grace: Ik (I know) Like they say come talk to them if u have a problem, yet they don't actually give a s--t
Friend: Ikr (I know, right?) Like f--k I should just skip you and go to the police
Grace: Like they don't actually give a s--t til its too late Like if i got bullied into suicide, they then would actually do something
Friend: Ikr Like they will care if you kill yourself
Grace: I hate this school so god damn much. They dont do jack s--t until its too f--king late. They don't care if people are getting harassed, bullied, etc.
Near the end of the chat, Grace adds: I want to actually f--king say something to the principal, but why the f--k would he even care? Like who do i even go to at this point."
Jeremy and Lauren say they shared those messages with the school's administration soon after Grace's death.
Yet, they are still waiting for answers.
We continue to provide mental health supports for this school, staff and students as necessary," Smouter said in a statement sent to The Spectator last week in response to queries about the review. We share information and programs around healthy relationships, bullying prevention and intervention, all supported by staff, including social workers and child and youth workers and the resources of School Mental Health Ontario.
The school will be reaching out to the family at this time as well.
Our internal review is ongoing."
When asked why the review hasn't been completed, Smouter answered: There have been some unexpected delays, but reviews of this nature do take time to plan and complete. We expect it will be complete in the coming months."
Grace's parents also have unanswered questions about their daughter's last day at school.
She came home that Friday upset. Something happened during a badminton game, but the details are a mystery. School staff have never tried to fill in the gaps for Lauren and Jeremy.
That night, Grace texted classmates to say she had taken Tylenol, Advil and Gravol.
On Saturday and Sunday, she complained of abdominal pain and vomiting. Her parents thought she had the flu. Later it would be confirmed she did in fact have COVID.
By Monday morning Grace was confused." Then she trashed her bedroom and was found with an altered level of consciousness," according to the coroner's report.
She was taken to Brantford General Hospital, then airlifted to McMaster Children's Hospital.
Grace went into cardiac arrest twice.
Her parents made the decision not to escalate care," the report said.
Grace died at 1:42 a.m. on Tuesday.
Toxicology results showed she died of complications of acute acetaminophen toxicity due to acetaminophen overdose."
She had taken Tylenol she found in her house. Lauren believes she swallowed about 15 pills. Over the next three days they shut down her liver, her kidneys and finally her heart.
After she was gone, a note was found in her bedroom, drafted on the typewriter she used to write poetry.
Just kill yourself," it said.
Lauren and Jeremy have been on a mission to educate the public about the dangers of Tylenol and to call for change: keeping Tylenol behind the counter; smaller bottles of pills; only selling to those 16 and older.
Meanwhile, they say they are stuck in their own grieving process because they can't get answers from the school board about the bullying, what staff knew and did about it, and the final incident before Grace's suicide.
The school board has only once directly addressed Grace's death publicly. That was last April, when board chair Susan Gibson spoke of her briefly at a monthly board meeting. She acknowledged Grace was an amazing writer" who taught herself to play the guitar.
She was a great friend and used her sense of humour to keep classmates and staff in good spirits. She was a light to everyone she crossed paths with and will never be forgotten."
Susan Clairmont is a justice columnist at The Spectator. sclairmont@thespec.com
For help
Kids Help Line 1-800-668-6868 or kidshelpphone.ca.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255
COAST 905-972-8338
Barrett Centre 1-844-777-3571
Native Women's Centre 1-888-308-6559
Good2Talk 1-866-925-5454
Crisis Services Canada 1-833-456-4566