‘One and done’ parents are some of the most thoughtful and compassionate I have met | Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett

It's time to retire the offensive, outdated idea that having only one child is somehow selfish or unfair

Aren't you worried they'll be lonely?" This is the question that the parents of only children are probably asked the most, and the one that is mentioned again and again when I asked for one and done" parents to get in touch. Although one and done" parenting is on the rise, and in some countries only children are becoming the norm, the stigma against single-child families is real. Stereotypes about only children being spoilt, obnoxious or lonely persist.

What my callout on social media revealed is that there are many persuasive economic and social reasons for deciding to only have only one child, and though they can be as diverse and complex as families themselves, there are some common threads.

Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett is a Guardian columnist and author