Skull and Bones review – yo ho ho and some pockets of fun

PlayStation 5, Xbox Series S/X, PC; Ubisoft
This swashbuckling multiplayer game lacks swagger, but if you're seeking a trade and naval battle simulator then hop on

The frustrating thing about this swashbuckling multiplayer game from Ubisoft, which has reportedly been in development hell for about a decade, is that it's almost good. Some things about it are good, such as the ship battles, which are intriguingly customisable, more flexible than you'd expect, even thrilling when you're up against a well-matched opponent. And when you're sailing from the African coast to the East Indies, or through river channels with tropical wilderness on all sides, you cannot help but admire how beautiful this game can be. And some things about it may become good; right now, the menus are confusing, and it's slow and turgid for hours before your piratical expeditions become more exciting, but a few tweaks could really pick up the pace. This is a live-service game, so it has room to evolve.

But some things about Skull and Bones will never be good, at least not without tearing them down and starting again, which after years of expensive delays seems unlikely to happen. All of the characters in this game have dead eyes, and only their lips move when they speak to you. The story is so boring that after more than 20 hours on the seas, I can tell you the relative worth of uncut gems and where to sell your tobacco for the best price, but not the name of a single character or faction. And when you are on land, there's nothing to do - no sword fighting, no treasure-hunting, no meaningful exploration. Immense effort has been expended on creating small oases of land, and then nothing ever exists there except a couple of quest-givers and a bonfire. Only two more populous pirate-hub settlements exist on the whole map, where you can at least find a blacksmith or a tavern, but finding other interesting places to dock is a bust.

Skull and Bones is out now; 49.99