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The Miami Marlins, an alleged major league club in the NL East, are carrying on with their plan to strip the franchise bare and trade off all their players worth a damn. Giancarlo Stanton is a Yankee, Dee Gordon is a Mariner, everyone else is available, and now Marcell Ozuna is a Cardinal. Jesse Sanchez first reported…Read more...

As a general rule, when the internet’s baking outer shitlands send aspiring creators of fake news, it isn’t sending us its best. It’s sending Destroy Belly Fat With One Weird Click fraudwads, it’s sending Macedonian click-hustlers and pinwheel-eyed domestic weirdos whose minds have been corroded by partisan politics…Read more...

Two years ago, former NBA All-Star Chris Gatling was charged with fraud, aggravated identity theft, and forgery. He was accused of running a network of online businesses that illegally charged people’s credit cards without them knowing about it. Yesterday, he was sentenced to 2.5 years in prison after pleading guilty…Read more...

Uniqlo’s hopping on the Daily Deals bandwagon, and today it’s $10 graphic tees. Snoopy, MOMA, Star Wars, and more designs are discounted for everyone. Plus, there’s free shipping on everything.Read more...

When standing over a late, potentially match-winning penalty against top-of-the-table opposition, as Zwolle captain Bram van Polen found himself in yesterday’s game against AZ Alkmaar, the last thing you want your resulting shot attempt to inspire in the crowd is an immediate wave of shocked horror. Just look at all…Read more...

A few days after several on-air NFL Network employees were suspended following a wrongful termination suit filed by a former employee, Lindsay McCormick, a reporter who’s worked for ESPN and Sunday Night Football, posted about sexism she encountered while interviewing for a job with the network. She said the head of…Read more...

For all the video game industry’s noisy hype about groundbreaking technology, it’s still rare that a device comes along and actually breaks new ground. In just nine months, the Nintendo Switch has done just that. The world of games feels different now than it did one year ago.

Three-time defending Tour de France champion Chris Froome failed a doping test at the Vuelta a España this September and is facing a potential year-long suspension from cycling, as the Guardian first reported today. Froome, the most dominant cyclist of the past decade and the winner of four Tours and one Vuelta,…Read more...

I went to Boston for a hurling tournament with plans to poke fun at the city’s heavy-handed claim to Irish heritage. Real Irishmen—tall ones, who are good at sports—would show up at the municipal manifestation of a St. Patrick’s Day parade and surely put to shame some drunken Massholes.Read more...

Even though Thanos has been trying his damnedest to get her attention for eons, Marvel’s abstract concept of Death’s been spending the bulk of her time lately hanging out with Ben Reilly, Spider-Man’s clone. In this week’s Scarlet Spider, Death visited Ben for a friendly chat about her involvement in the 2016 World…Read more...

A Saints fan named Lee Dragna, who appears to be a real dumbass, has filed a lawsuit against the team seeking a refund for his season tickets. He wants the refund because his ability to enjoy Saints games has been ruined by the NFL’s anthem protests.

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Here’s Vegas Golden Knights center Jonathan Marchessault trying desperately to exit the penalty box in the third period of last night’s game against Carolina, as boxmate David Perron tries to yank the door open and the officials seemingly argue about whether he should be freed or not. This seems like something they…Read more...

A versatile Dyson vacuum, sub-$20 Anker earbuds, and a big Zappos sale on Ugg boots lead off Wednesday’s best deals from around the web.Read more...

Dyson vacuums dominated the nominations in our Kinja Co-Op for best vacuum, but they can be prohibitively expensive. Today though, refurbs of the popular Dyson Ball Animal Complete are down to $260 on Amazon, one of the best prices we’ve seen.

Just go with it:Read more...

The words “elbow” and “damage” can easily be terrifying when used together in any headline about a pitcher, much less one who could potentially be among the greatest players of his generation and certainly among the most fascinating, but do not fret (that much). Jeff Passan of Yahoo Sports has reported that Shohei…Read more...

Joel Embiid is talented and charming and big, a combination of qualities which can reasonably be quite daunting in anyone, but especially so in a basketball player. Karl-Anthony Towns’s strategy for handling all that during the second quarter tonight was just to panic-jump, arms outstretched, at a random point along…Read more...

Eight weeks after he went down with a broken collarbone and seemingly took the Packers’ playoff hopes down with him, Aaron Rodgers has been medically cleared to return—with, of course, those playoff hopes still alive and now more fearsome than ever.

We talk about LeBron James and his team pretty often around here, but their 123-114 win over Atlanta tonight (not as close as it appears) was yet another reminder of how the King can take your breath away. The Cavs always dominate the Hawks—they’ve hit in NBA-record 25 threes against them twice—and this was just…Read more...

Madison Square Garden looks like an extremely fun place to be tonight, as two teams filled with intriguing young talents keep going back and forth with each other through three quarters. The game’s excitement peaked (so far) with this pulse-pounding two minutes of basketball, which kicked off with a Lonzo Ball slam…Read more...

Olympic runner and convicted murderer Oscar Pistorius was hurt in a fight with another inmate that began over the use of a public telephone, a South African prison official has confirmed to the Associated Press.

In an interview with the Washington Post, former NFL running back Larry Johnson says he can’t remember two of his seven seasons in the league. Johnson tells the paper’s Kent Babb he believes he’s living with chronic traumatic encephalopathy, a degenerative brain disease caused by repeated head trauma.Read more...

Former Auburn associate head softball coach Corey Myers—son of former head coach Clint Myers, who abruptly retired this summer—was banned from campus for having romantic relationships with multiple students whom he supervised or coached, according to a letter from the school’s Title IX office obtained by ESPN.Read more...

You will no doubt be shocked to learn that former baseball player Jose Canseco, who was charged with domestic violence twice in the 1990s and pleaded no contest once (to name just a couple of his many legal issues), made a bad tweet today:Read more...

Barring any individual or group ticket purchases, the United States soccer team will not be attending next summer’s World Cup. The general consensus places a good deal of the blame for on the nightmarishly incompetent coaching job done by MLS lifer Bruce Arena. Due to his conservatism, passionate desire for 1-0…Read more...

Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin is plenty fired up to play the Patriots on Sunday, and he’s not afraid to say so. From ESPN:Read more...

One of curling’s unusual features, other than everything else, has been its politeness and sportsmanship. The first page of the official rulebook discusses The Spirit of Curling for a reason, as it points out that players should be the first to admit if they broke a rule. (Imagine if NBA or NHL players called their…Read more...

Tom Brady, in his quest to become the NFL’s answer to Gwyneth Paltrow, has just launched the TB12 Method mobile app. The TB12 Method is the dubious lifestyle brand that Brady cooked up with Alex Guerrero, a truly dangerous and dishonest quack who is Brady’s personal trainer. For the low cost of $19.99 per month or…Read more...

There’s no shortage of stories about President Donald Trump being a gross, aggressive perv, and Stacia Robitaille shared another on Twitter last night:Read more...

If you’re a reasonable, decent, sentient person paying even half-assed attention to the credible and relentless news cycle regarding Roy Moore’s predilection for preying on underage girls, you will not be voting for him in Alabama’s special election for a senator today. The candidate arrived at the polls on horseback…Read more...

In 2009, L.A. Weekly wrote a story about jerkin’—a dance craze sweeping across the Los Angeles basin—that highlighted the work of then little-known rapper YG. “He was so fresh out of prison, he still had ‘FREE YG!’ on his MySpace page,” the story’s author Jeff Weiss told me. It was one of the first interviews YG ever…Read more...

The Nürburgring is heaven on earth for car nuts, attracting the world’s most interesting cars, including manufacturers’ latest models. You can even drive it yourself! Sometimes a dream trip to the ‘Ring doesn’t end up being quite so enviable, though, and here are this year’s fail compilations that prove it.

Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we’re talking Josh Homme, bathroom stall doors, meme addiction, and more.

Is the hot stove hot? Let’s see here, yes, it looks like the stove is simmering a bit.Read more...

At the Sturgeon Heights Pros vs. Joes event last week, former CFL player Jordan Reaves attempted to entertain attendees by dunking a basketball over Ismail Zaid. He certainly entertained everyone (except for maybe Zaid), though he did not come close to actually accomplishing the dunk.

The Patriots couldn’t convert a single third down (in 11 chances) in Monday night’s 27-20 loss to the Dolphins. Head coach Bill Belichick opened up about the defeat after the game by grumbling and staring and grumbling some more.

Blizzard’s Overwatch League is maybe the most ambitious American esports league ever, and its preseason wrapped up this weekend. The Compete staff, with an assist from our one blogparent that we’re still on speaking terms with, breaks down what went well last weekend and what can be improved for the regular season.…Read more...

Oh! It’s you! My dearest, most refined holiday compatriot! My apologies, I didn’t see you were at the door.

Days removed from seeing Star Wars: The Last Jedi, I still can’t believe it’s a real movie. I can’t believe what writer-director Rian Johnson did: He took all of our preconceived notions of what a Star Wars movie is and evolved them. The movie is genuinely shocking at times—multiple times—but it also feels fully…Read more...

ESPN has suspended analysts Donovan McNabb and Eric Davis after a lawsuit filed in Los Angeles named the former NFL Network personalities among those alleged to have committed sexual harassment against a network wardrobe stylist.Read more...

Lest you think Arsenal fans have a monopoly on incensed postgame rants helpfully broadcast on fan-driven Youtube channels, here is a completely apoplectic Manchester United supporter doing his best Troopz impression right after the derby loss. Could’ve used a few more “bloods” and “fams,” but very strong regardless.Read more...

Think fly fishing is a man’s world? Well, you’re dead wrong. Dead wrong! Because women are now the fastest growing demographic in fly fishing.

Remember how awful Dodgers starter Yu Darvish was in the World Series? He only made it through 10 outs in two starts. He allowed nine hits, eight earned runs, and two homers. He sucked big-time! Now, thanks to Sports Illustrated’s Tom Verducci, we know why.

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Discounts on laptops, monitors, and modems in Amazon’s tech Gold Box, $5 off any $15+ book, and a SONOS speaker sale kick off today’s best deals.Read more...

Longtime MLB umpire Dale Scott has decided to retire, citing a string of concussions in recent years and his fear that any more could lead to long-term health effects.

Greg Schiano’s contract with the University of Tennessee was to be for six years and more than $27 million, according to the terms of the deal laid out in the Memorandum of Understanding signed by Schiano and then-UT athletic director John Currie. The MOU, which can be read below, was released in response to a public…Read more...

If you thought Amazon’s $5 off $20 book sale during Black Friday was great, here’s a nice surprise - $5 off any $15 book order with promo code BOOKGIFT17.