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1) Getting hit by a car

To celebrate the launch of Apple TV+, AT&T is currently offering the Apple TV 4K streaming box for $90, the best cash discount we’ve ever seen on the thing.

It’s a strange and sad fact of how sports works in this moment that the number of people who cared about poor Andy Dalton being benched by the ultra-moribund Cincinnati Bengals and the Washington Nationals winning the World Series in thrilling and satisfying fashion is pretty close. But when we recorded this Deadcast,…Read more...

The Washington Nationals won the World Series, which feels like an insane thing to write. (Be happy for them at your own discretion.) But let’s talk about Gerrit Cole. The Astros pitcher, one of the best in baseball, was nowhere to be found as Houston lost Game 7, 6-2. Manager A.J. Hinch revealed that it was part of a…Read more...

With the aid of his caddy, Sue Carpenter, blind golfer Graham Coulton is able to play.Read more...

I may not know much about baseball, but I do know one thing: if I were presented with, say, the World Series Champion Washington Nationals baseball team on a silver platter wearing nothing but the little cups they use to protect their dicks, I would work my way through that team like a bulldozer clearing old-growth…Read more...

Social media has Hoovered the best years out of my life. The last thing I remember, I was a college freshman whose cosplay enthusiast girlfriend signed us both up for a website called “The Face Book.” Now, I’m middle-aged and drive an electric car. As if this wasn’t already evident, at no point between these events…Read more...

On December 8, 2018, David Arquette was standing in front of a table in the 2300 Arena, formerly the ECW Arena. He was wrestling later that night but was at that moment signing autographs and taking pictures. A fan approached the table to tell Arquette that he was his favorite World Championship Wrestling champion.…Read more...

It is incredibly rare for WWE talent to be vocal about their treatment at the hands of the company, and doubly rare when that mistreatment pertains to issues that are broader and more sensitive than things like booking. This is a big part of what makes the ongoing and very public dust-up between WWE and Albert Hardie…Read more...

The Jordanian professional soccer team Al Wihdat plays at the heart of a refugee camp, both literally and figuratively, and is both a literal and figurative product and reminder of dispossession. Palestinian refugees and their descendants are the backbone of the club’s fanbase; their jerseys are red, green, and black,…Read more...

This World Series is depressing as hell, just like many other things that are happening right now and which we have no control over. Neither the Houston Astros nor the Washington Nationals (my team) have managed to win a home game. At Game 3, people were literally crying as we left the stadium, which was mainly…Read more...

After a season of fighting MLS’s draconian Code of Conduct, Seattle Sounders fans can celebrate a berth in the MLS Cup. Following Seattle’s 3-1 victory over LAFC, the Iron Front flag will surely find its way into the league’s final match of the year, much to the chagrin of those who desired profits over protests.

Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we’re talking about mercy rules, Jason Statham, baseball, cereal, bad roommates, and more.

Every now and then, Boris Johnson stumbles stammering down a street in England looking like a toilet brush that has somehow been granted admission to a fancy private school. Cameras are trained on him because he’s the prime minister of the United Kingdom, but they were on him before. He has been, for some years now,…Read more...

I spent the last three months living in Mexico City. While I was there, I met three good dogs.

Yesterday, I was having a nice coffee outside with a friend who was telling me about an upcoming trip. He and his girlfriend were going to a wedding in Austin. I, a famous lover a good wedding, wanted details. There’s a moment when you ask people who wear dresses about weddings that never comes up with people who wear…Read more...

Yesterday, D.C. writer Topher Mathews posted about the pumpkin on his doorstep. Specifically, he posted about how someone had stolen his pumpkin. It happens all the time! However, I have to say that I am pretty sure most pumpkin thefts are not this funny.

A Kyoku knife exclusive, Yamaha soundbar, sweater stone, and a powerful juicer lead off Tuesday’s best deals from around the web.Read more...

You know how every so often, we’ll get a story about Bill Belichick exploiting some obscure loophole in order to give the Patriots a better opportunity in a certain scenario? What Browns head coach Freddie Kitchens did in Sunday’s 27-13 loss to New England is the opposite of that.Read more...

Well, that went well, didn’t it? Donald Trump went to a baseball game, he got booed, the home team got hammered again, and the ratings are still, well, the ratings.

This is all pretty suspicious, no? After last week’s Denver Broncos loss, wide receiver Emmanuel Sanders said, among other criticisms, “We need to call better plays.” He then quickly disappeared off the team in a trade with San Francisco. Now, after the Broncos lost again on Sunday in a heartbreaker to the Colts, and…Read more...

What should’ve been, and what almost was, a desperately needed victory instead became more reason for acrimony and turmoil. A floundering Arsenal hosted Crystal Palace on Sunday, and after jumping out to a 2–0 lead early on, the Gunners threw away their advantage and wound up settling for a draw. From the result…Read more...

Fall is hands-down my favorite time of the year. Everything great happens during this season: crunchy leaves, apple cider doughnuts, cuffing season, Thanksgiving, Halloween, and Black Friday (oh god, oh god, oh god please help me.)Read more...

We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.Read more...

It’s not clear what this unidentified player did to earn a red card in a German amateur soccer match between FSV Münster and TV Smend, but he definitely deserved a red and even more for his reaction to the card, which was to punch the referee’s lights out:

Big fat dunks, pinpoint dimes, and the gumption to go at Kyrie Irving in a scoring duel and win? Ja Morant delivered on all those fronts Sunday as the Memphis Grizzlies took out the Brooklyn Nets, 134-133. Based on Morant’s 30-point, nine-assist explosion, the No. 2 pick out of Murray State intends to remain one of…Read more...

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SOCORRO, New Mexico — Ten traffic cones dotted a large dirt pitch, each threaded with a helium balloon: five yellow, five pink. The balloons were the kind you’d find at any dollar store or birthday party, perfectly innocuous. At the far end of the arena, a mounted rider paced a small track in the earth, and then…Read more...

There are three races left in the NASCAR Cup Series season, which is around the time drivers still going for the title start to get testy. It was Denny Hamlin and Joey Logano’s turn at Martinsville Speedway this weekend, in a fight that led to Hamlin being thrown to the ground in a move NASCAR will “probably” penalize.Read more...

The USMNT is currently looking like wet slop, Gregg Berhalter seems like a bad coach, and, until last weekend, Christian Pulisic was not earning as much playing time as he wanted over at Chelsea. It has been a bad month all told, especially with the future of the program’s best dual national suddenly up for grabs.…Read more...

Matt Nagy spent most of the offseason openly tormenting himself and his team about the double-doink kick that knocked the Bears out of last year’s playoffs. The stakes behind Sunday’s game-losing miss weren’t nearly as high—nobody is going to remember the Bears losing a game 17–16 in October, because the Bears…Read more...

A Menlo Club offer, Indochino exclusive, Hamilton Beach mixer, and a cat brush lead off Monday’s best deals from around the web.Read more...

Even with Patrick Mahomes stuck on the sideline, Sunday night’s game between the Chiefs and the Packers played out as an entertaining battle of offenses that kept matching each other blow for blow. But in a fight between the recently un-retired Matt Moore and the god Aaron Rodgers, it was only a matter of time before…Read more...

The Falcons are a bad football team. As such, head coach Dan Quinn is expected to not be the head coach for very much longer. But when will Quinn be fired? Now, with a depressing 1-7 record and entering the bye? After the near-inevitable loss to the rival Saints in two weeks? Painlessly and in his sleep on the morning…Read more...

Instant Pot Ultra 10-in-1 Pressure Cooker (8-quart) | $100 | AmazonRead more...

The last baseball game of 2019 played in D.C. ended with a thud.Read more...

For once, Donald Trump got booed by a bunch of people in red hats.

Texans QB Deshaun Watson can get you out of your seat at a moment’s notice, but he might have outdone himself while throwing a go-ahead fourth quarter touchdown in his team’s game against the Raiders on Sunday.

After the Clippers beat the brakes off the Warriors on Friday, coach Steve Kerr offered the following foreboding quote to reporters about what his team should expect for the remainder of the season:Read more...

Jacoby Brissett once again proved himself to be a trustworthy starter on Sunday, leading his Colts to a 5-2 record with a 15-13 late comeback win against the Broncos. Adam Vinatieri got the points that notched the victory, but it was Brissett who made one of the weekend’s best plays anywhere on a football field this…Read more...

The Cleveland Browns came into their game against New England this week with a lot of optimism. Jarvis Landry even guaranteed victory over the defending Super Bowl champs, before recanting a bit.

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers were given a lifeline late in their game against the Tennessee Titans on Sunday. On a fourth-and-2, it certainly appeared as though the Titans were lining up to kick the field goal and extend their lead to 30-23. However, when the ball was snapped to Brett Kern he picked it up and tried to run…Read more...

What was going to be a marquee Game 5 pitching rematch on Sunday night between the Astros’ Gerrit Cole and the Nationals’ Max Scherzer has taken a bizarre left turn, as Scherzer won’t be healthy enough to get on the mound for Washington. In a shock announcement this afternoon, manager Davey Martinez said his best…Read more...

The Chicago Bears have some *ahem* history with missed field goals, and the failure of Cody Parkey in last season’s playoffs clearly haunted the psyche of coach Matt Nagy all summer. But while this miss—by replacement kicker Eddy Pineiro to lose 17-16 against the Chargers—may not be as significant as a Wild Card loss…Read more...

Tampa Bay’s offense is at its worst whenever Mike Evans doesn’t have the ball. Case in point is this third-and-goal play with the offense just four yards from the end zone. What should have been a simple hand off to running back Dare Ogunbowale turned into a comedy of errors as Breshad Perriman jacked up his teammate…Read more...

Is this football? I think it’s supposed to be football, but what I’m seeing is an especially glitchy game of Madden I need to turn off and turn back on again. And the fans in Chicago seem to agree with me. Heading into halftime against the Chargers, down 7-6 with 45 seconds remaining in the quarter, the Chicago Bears…Read more...

Yeah, sure, it’s possible for a team to score a touchdown on a boring old flea flicker, but if you could jazz things up by scoring on an Ultra Spectacular Jet Sweep Double Flea Flicker Reverse™️ instead, why wouldn’t you? That’s what the Rams were clearly thinking today in England against the Bengals, as they took a…Read more...

The Houston Astros have finally retracted their statement which claimed that Sports Illustrated’s Stephanie Apstein was “fabricating” her story about former assistant GM Brandon Taubman yelling “Thank God we got Osuna! I’m so fucking glad we got Osuna!” at a group of female reporters after the team’s Game 6 ALCS win…Read more...

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I don’t want to alarm you, but you should begin to prepare for a world where the Phoenix Suns are NBA champions. It’s the only logical conclusion one could come to after one of the league’s sorriest franchises beat the Clippers on Saturday, 130-122, without their starting center (Deandre Ayton) or point guard (Ricky…Read more...