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Updated 2025-11-10 00:32
Deadspin Up All Night: People Should See How We're Livin'
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. We’ll be around.Read more...
The 10 Best Deals of August 21, 2019
We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.Read more...
How Early Is Too Early To Be Nervous About Mitch Marner?
Everything is fine in Toronto, because training camp doesn’t even start for another few weeks. But ... is it really? The negotiations between the Maple Leafs and their wunderkind RFA winger Mitch Marner have, perhaps unsurprisingly, plodded through the offseason with minimal progress, or at least with minimal progress…Read more...
Dog Racing Died Without A Funeral
SARASOTA, FLORIDA — The sun hadn’t yet risen over the Sarasota Kennel Club, and Deb Linn was wrist deep in 100 pounds of bloody meat. She had been been up since 4:30 a.m., when she made the 45-minute commute south from Ellenton, a small town where the rent is more affordable than in the wealthy beach city of Sarasota.…Read more...
CNN Wonders If Smartphones Are Why The Tennis Youth Can't Beat Roger Federer
An article over at CNN today formally advances a claim dropped casually by commentators, coaches, fans, and any crank with a taste for caricaturing a whole generation. Here goes: Smartphones are hampering tennis’s young players, which is why they can’t stop the Big Three in the men’s game, who enjoyed the advantage…Read more...
MLB To Horny Players: Please Use The Good Dick Pills, Not The Bad Ones
Baseball players are too damn horny. So says MLB, which had to send out a memo to its players on Monday telling them to stop using over-the-counter “sexual-enhancement pills.” The risk, beyond engorged wooden bats, is that these pills have substances in them that might get flagged on a drug test.
The New XFL Team Names And Logos Are Something Worse Than Bad
The second, flaghumpinger incarnation of the XFL is, it appears, truly actually happening next spring. Landry Jones is in and the league has real teams and everything! Unfortunately, these are those teams.Read more...
Big Blanket Co. Now Makes a Comically Large Weighted Blanket
Big Blanket Co. specializes in—wait for it—big blankets. And now, they’re finally coming out with a really big weighted blanket.Read more...
Larry Bird Complains After Artist’s Mural Makes Him Seem Too Interesting
Artist Jules Muck recently painted a mural of Larry Bird in the Fountain Square section of Indianapolis, which features the image of Bird in his Indiana State jersey doing the “Shh!” gesture, similar to the Nov. 28, 1977 cover of Sports Illustrated. This time, though, Bird is doing the shushing instead of the Indiana…Read more...
Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Houston Texans
Some people are fans of the Houston Texans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Houston Texans. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here.
Manager Ascends To New Level Of Consciousness, Makes Completely Logical Connection Between The Handball Rule And Brexit
The modern discourse is a never-ending cascade of Expanding Brain memes. Everyone plays their part, and when Deadspin is doing its job well, we provide takes that belong to one of the latter panels, ones hopefully more sophisticated than this but less out-there than this. Proving that our angle on the handball call…Read more...
Baseball Maniac Hunter Strickland Broke His Nose With A Barbell To The Face
Last time we checked in on Nationals pitcher Hunter Strickland, he was sending himself to the injured list for two months after punching a wall. While not as self-evidently stupid, his most recent injury is just as bizarre: in the run-up to Tuesday’s game against the Pirates, Strickland got hit in the face with a…Read more...
Are The Cleveland Browns The Model NFL Franchise Of The Future? A Very Short Debate
No.
What Do We Think Happened In Right Field On This Bunt Home Run?
Okay, yes, I know the answer to the question posed in this headline, but I’m not going to tell you what it is until you watch this clip from a minor-league baseball game and formulate your own theory:
Old Joe Biden Goes to a Farm
URBANDALE, Iowa—Really, what Joe Biden looks like is a game show host. The tan, the blindingly white dentures, the “Hey folks.” Give him a long, skinny mic and a little more bouffant up top and he’s Bob Barker. But if Joe was a TV guy, he’d be getting eased off to the golf course right about now. All the zingers have…Read more...
Little Leaguer On Pirates Game: “Not A Lot Of People Here”
Poor Pittsburgh. They have this gorgeous stadium, maybe the best in baseball, and yet the team is next-to-last in the National League after going 7-28 since the All-Star Break. They rank 24th in attendance with 19,692 fans a game. And now children are ragging on that fact!Read more...
I Could Watch Bernie Sanders Play Competent Softball on a Loop Until I Die
Bernie Sanders put his Brooklyn stickball training to good use on Tuesday by playing a fairly competent game of softball at Iowa’s Field of Dreams. Generally, these kinds of events feel forced, but please tell me if you don’t see a soupçon of fun and whimsy in Uncle Bernard’s astonishingly capable softball skills.Read more...
Bo Bichette Vs. Clayton Kershaw Was A Rad Time
Last night’s game between the Dodgers and Blue Jays turned into a blowout win for Los Angeles, and a late-August game between one team with a 19-game division lead and another that’s 14 games under .500 wouldn’t normally be worth our attention. But this game had something special, which mattered far more than the…Read more...
The Antonio Brown Helmet Saga Ends With A Wet Thud
I suppose the only way the Antonio Brown Body Issue could wrap up was with him turning into a penitent and eager company man. He fought the law, the law yawned, took its feet off the desk, mixed itself a drink and hammered him flat, and he went “all-in” on being an Oakland Raider by playing Jon Gruden’s best friend on …Read more...
Save On Amazon's New Blink XT 2 Security Cameras For the First Time
All-new Blink XT2 Outdoor/Indoor Smart Security Camera Starter Kit | $80 | Amazon | Additional camera kits also on saleRead more...
Idiot Squirrel On The Field Successfully Invades Consecutive Twins Games
For the second night in a row, a daring squirrel has invaded the field at the Twins’ stadium. Monday night the furry fellow invaded the home dugout and sent several players fleeing in terror. Tuesday night our intrepid rodent pal bolted down the first baseline, nutmegged a baserunner, briefly leapt into the crowd, and…Read more...
Brian Flores Loads Practice Playlist With Jay-Z Tracks One Day After Kenny Stills Criticizes NFL's Roc Nation Partnership
Dolphins head coach Brian Flores and wide receiver Kenny Stills have not been on the same page when it comes to Stills speaking out about systemic racism. A couple weeks back, Flores delivered a weak-sauce admonishment when Stills criticized owner Stephen Ross’s hefty support of Donald Trump’s reelection campaign. N…Read more...
The Lakers Already Have A Center
Hey, remember back in mid-July, when the Lakers traded the moon and stars for one of the most talented young players in the NBA? Remember that? Remember when the team and the player did their big introductory press conference? Remember during that press conference, when that player—who is listed by the NBA as standing…Read more...
Jerry Jones Asserts His Right To Be A Dickweed About Ezekiel Elliott
Jerry and Stephen Jones held a press conference Tuesday with Cowboys linebacker Jaylon Smith, who just signed a hefty five-year extension with the team. Smith’s successful negotiations stand in stark contrast to those of wide receiver Amari Cooper, quarterback Dak Prescott, and running back Ezekiel Elliott, all of…Read more...
By Banning Protest Signs, MLS Is Trying To Lobotomize The Fandom It Asked For
MLS and its clubs are currently embroiled in a fight against their own supporters over what the league claims are violations of its anti-politics rules. Over the last two weeks, multiple fans in multiple stadiums have been ejected for banners that run afoul of the league’s Fan Code of Conduct. There has also been a…Read more...
Ronda Rousey Fucked Up Her Finger While She Filmed A TV Show
Let’s issue the warning up front: You’re going to see a pretty gross finger if you keep reading. It looks like a bloody lowercase “Z,” if that helps you sharpen your imagination. Okay, you’ve been warned.
HelmetWatch: Jon Gruden Says Antonio Brown Practiced In An NFL-Certified Helmet Today
Antonio Brown’s long struggle with the NFL and the Raiders for the right to wear whatever old helmet he most desires may have reached a ceasefire on Tuesday. The brand-new Oakland wideout practiced with the team in an NFL-approved helmet for the first time since he went AWOL a couple of days ago, according to head…Read more...
Baseball's Cranks Agree: The Sport Was Better When They Were Part Of It
Hall of Fame reliever Goose Gossage has been complaining about the state of baseball for so long that his complaints have spanned multiple decades of the sport. It feels like just yesterday, he was lecturing Joba Chamberlain on “the Yankee way.” (Joba Chamberlain is now retired.) Eleven years later, Gossage is still…Read more...
Shut Up With "LETTT’SSSS GOOOOOOO" Already
Today, we’re talking about ex-girlfriends, pens, secession, King Kong at the plate, and more.
Report: Octavio Dotel And Luis Castillo Arrested In Narcotics Sting In Dominican Republic
Who is ready for a particularly grim session of Let’s Remember Some Guys? Because according to reports coming out of the Dominican Republic, former MLB players Octavio Dotel and Luis Castillo have been arrested in what authorities have described as “the largest operation against organized crime” in the country:
Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Baltimore Ravens
Some people are fans of the Baltimore Ravens. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Baltimore Ravens. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here.
The Football Team In Euphoria Is Complete Trash
It has been two weeks since the finale of HBO’s R-rated Riverdale knock-off, Euphoria, aired to glowing reviews. Everyone wants to talk about how the show found its earnest heart, and whether Jules will come back, and how all the teens may be doomed by sexting and drugs, but no one wants to talk about how East…Read more...
Add Baker Mayfield To The List Of People Who Think It Was Dumb To Draft Daniel Jones
At this point you are not exactly going out on a limb when you say it was stupid for the New York Giants to draft Daniel Jones. Everybody is already saying this, and will likely continue to say it up until the point Jones throws a bunch of touchdowns and leads the Giants to the playoffs. With that in mind, we can give…Read more...
Report: Inter Miami's Proposed Stadium Site Is An Arsenic-Filled Poison Pit
The long wait to watch David Beckham’s Miami MLS franchise play in all the promised glitziness has hit yet another unfortunate snag: the ground where Inter Miami’s ritzy new stadium is to be built is literally poisoned.Read more...
Tuesday's Best Deals: Edifier Speakers, Super Mario Odyssey, Backcountry Gear, and More
A couple of Edifier bookshelf speakers, Super Mario Odyssey, and up to 40% off Climb Gear at Backcountry lead of Tuesday’s best deals from around the web.Read more...
Please Enjoy This Brief Video Of Devin Booker Being A Pickup Weenie
In general, it’s fine to have informal house rules in a pickup basketball game. “Guard your man” is a good one, for example: Few things are more annoying or more ruinous to the flow of play than the lazy sack of crap who sags 20 feet off his man, substituting the aggregate strategic soundness of letting an amateur…Read more...
Paul DeJong Pulled A "The Natural" On The Big Mac Sign In St. Louis
You know the big, climactic ending to The Natural, where Robert Redford booms a huge, pennant-winning bomb that knocks out a lighting fixture in the stadium? Okay, so maybe Paul DeJong’s sixth-inning homer in the Cardinals’ 3-0 win against the Brewers in mid-August isn’t quite that dramatic, even if the ball did break…Read more...
Jimmy Garoppolo's Return Was Pretty Miserable
The important thing is that Jimmy Garoppolo is healthy. It has to be, because to focus on the 49ers quarterback’s performance in his first game action since tearing his ACL in Week 3 last season is to invite some serious collar-tugging.
Antonio Brown's Helmet Saga Continues With A New Grievance Against The NFL
Antonio Brown was a no-show at Raiders practice Sunday, after recent developments offered tentative hope that his helmet saga was nearing a satisfying conclusion. Raiders general manager Mike Mayock expressed the team’s frustrations and eagerness to move on in a statement Sunday afternoon, but unless or until the team…Read more...
After Retrial, T.J. Simers Wins $15.45 Million Judgment Against The Los Angeles Times
Both sides eventually appealed a 2015 verdict that granted former Los Angeles Times hack sports columnist T.J. Simers $7.1 million in an age and disability discrimination suit against the paper. The Times appealed because holy shit, $7.1 million! Simers appealed because the amount was less than the $12 million he’d…Read more...
Report: Oh God Yes, There Is "Mutual Interest" Between Dwight Howard And The Lakers
The Lakers are casting about for replacements for DeMarcus Cousins after the big man shredded his ACL in a pickup game in Las Vegas last week. The pickings are slim. Joakim Noah is available! Only slightly better than that experiment in re-animation is this: the Lakers have requested permission from the Memphis…Read more...
Estadio Azteca Vows To Take Action Against Vendors Caught Watering Down Beers
The owners of Mexico City’s Estadio Azteca—the most famous and intimidating soccer venue in North America—announced that they have removed offending vendors, and has promised to take legal action, after beer-sellers in the stadium were caught watering down their product during a Club America win on Saturday.Read more...
Banger King Rúben Neves Scores The First Great Goal Of The Premier League Season
One of the best ongoing statistical oddities in English soccer is that Wolverhampton Wanderers youngster Rúben Neves has never scored for the club from inside the penalty box in open play. Heading into Monday’s game against Manchester United, the 22-year-old Portuguese midfielder had 12 goals for Wolves. Nine of those…Read more...
The 10 Best Deals of August 19, 2019
We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.Read more...
Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Seattle Seahawks
Some people are fans of the Seattle Seahawks. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Seattle Seahawks. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here.
That Is Not Markelle Fultz Or His Mom
During the third quarter of Sunday’s Indiana Fever-Washington Mystics game, the broadcast thought it had spotted a celebrity in the front row: Orlando Magic guard Markelle Fultz, who was identified alongside his mom. Great! Only it wasn’t Markelle Fultz.Read more...
BauBax's Lightweight Travel Shoes Come In a Bunch of Different Styles
BauBax has been turning out Kickstarter hits in the travel apparel space for a few years now, and while their jackets and pants put the focus on utility and versatility, their new travel shoes keep things simpler.Read more...
The New Handball Rule Is The Cold, VAR Is Cancer
For the second time in as many weeks of the new Premier League season, the biggest story from the weekend was another ruinously stupid imposition of VAR. The only thing more tiring than having to write the umpteenth anti-VAR post is having to witness video replay poison this wonderful sport from week to week.Read more...
Minor League Stadium Ravaged By The Dreaded Mumford & Sons
The Pioneer League’s Missoula Osprey had to postpone all of its games this weekend when the aftermath of a Mumford & Sons concert combined with bad weather to make the baseball field mushy and unplayable.Read more...
Old Man Wayne Rooney Is Sick Of These Damn Refs And All This Damn Traveling
Old Man Wayne Rooney’s MLS stint is just about done. At the conclusion of this season he’ll leave DC United to become a player-manager for Derby County back in England. Perhaps this is a good time for him to make an exit from American soccer, because he seems pretty fed up with the whole enterprise lately.
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