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Updated 2025-11-12 17:00
Oh Nothing, Just Another Mighty Walk-Off Dinger From Vladimir Guerrero Jr.
The New Hampshire Fisher Cats entered the bottom of the seventh* inning Sunday down 5-3 to the Binghamton Rumble Ponies. The very brink of a loss! Whatever would they do? Whosoever could save them from these dire circumstances?Read more...
José Bautista Shifts Into The "Too Crummy Even To Play Third Base For The Atlanta Braves" Stage Of His Career
José Bautista’s unexpected and endlessly depressing stint as a third-baseman for the Atlanta Braves, kicked-off ominously with a one-year minor league contract in mid-April, has not produced the way anyone involved might’ve hoped: Bautista is hitting a putrid .143 with an alarming .593 OPS in 40 plate appearances this…Read more...
The Preakness Was A Foggy, Muddy, Wonderful Mess
The Preakness, held Saturday at Maryland’s Pimlico Race Course, fucking ruled! The race itself was fine: the favorite won; the favorite was also the horse that won the Kentucky Derby; therefore the actual Preakness Stakes did the job of getting the broader non-gambling world through May with reason intact to pay…Read more...
The Rays Are Making History With Strange New Pitching Strategies
The Rays announced last week an extremely unusual, cosmic-brain plan for the immediate future of their pitching rotation: rather than the traditional approach of deploying a starting pitcher to work through the opposing lineup a few times before yielding to the bullpen, manager Kevin Cash decided to play matchup…Read more...
LeBron In Full Must-Win Mode Is An Unsolvable Problem
The Cavs opened Game 3 with a huge 22-6 run, and that was more or less that. This was not a case of the winning team grabbing an early lead behind a fluky start and nursing it cautiously until the final buzzer—the Cavs were forceful and decisive early, and did some cool and different things to challenge Boston’s…Read more...
Justify Wins Preakness Stakes, Allegedly
Prohibitive favorite Justify claimed the second leg of this year’s Triple Crown as the Kentucky Derby winner seized the Preakness Stakes in a time of 1:55.93, supposedly, we’ll have to take their word for it.Read more...
Benches Clear In Cubs-Reds After Bold Pitcher Stare-Down
Reds reliever Amir Garrett punctuated an inning-ending strikeout of Javier Baez in the seventh inning Saturday with a triumphant shout, loud enough to be audible over the television broadcast, followed by an aggressive stare-down of his vanquished foe. Unwritten rules and athlete egos being what they are, this did not…Read more...
Gianluigi Buffon Ends 17-Year Juventus Career With Win, Serie A Title
Legendary Juventus keeper Gianluigi Buffon was substituted out at about the hour mark of today’s match against Verona. The appearance will be the last in Buffon’s incredible 17-year run at Juventus. As you can imagine, it was an emotional moment:Read more...
Cowboys Receiver Terrance Williams Arrested After Crashing Lamborghini
Cowboys wide receiver Terrance Williams was reportedly arrested Saturday morning and charged with public intoxication following a crash involving his Lamborghini, according to ESPN:Read more...
Worthless Jedi Absolutely Humiliated By Cunning Novice
Astros mascot Orbit, who is also apparently a Jedi, was challenged to a lightsaber duel by Indians shortstop Francisco Lindor on Friday. Gotta say, I am starting to believe more and more in Luke Skywalker’s bitter “actually the Jedi are busters” preachings:Read more...
Petty-Ass Derek Jeter Yanks Credentials From Radio Host Who Tracked Down Marlins’ Overseas Corporate Office
Last month Miami radio host Andy Slater joined Marlins Man on an investigative trip to the British Virgin Islands, where they learned that the corporate address of the Miami Marlins was a post office box, listed in order to establish the Marlins as a foreign company, for the most cynical of reasons. This was an…Read more...
Concept For Las Vegas Sphere Sure Does Look Like A Blitzball Arena
The Madison Square Garden Company will break ground this summer in Las Vegas, according to officials (via AP), to build a massive sphere with projection and lights that sure does look like a damn blitzball arena from Final Fantasy X.Read more...
J.J. Watt Offers To Pay Funeral Costs For Santa Fe High School Shooting Victims
A gunman armed with a shotgun and a pistol murdered ten innocent people at Santa Fe High School, outside Houston, on Friday. A relatively minor concern for those victims’ families and friends will be how to foot funeral costs for their loved ones, but this news will nonetheless ease their terrible burden somewhat:…Read more...
Johnny Manziel Signs Contract To Play In Canadian Football League
Johnny Manziel, a prolific college quarterback whose career was put on hold for two years of mandatory service in the Cleveland Browns organization, will finally experience what it means to play for a professional football team:Read more...
Trim Your Pet's Nails With With $31 Cordless Dremel
Dremels are great for DIY projects, pumpkin carving, and apparently, pet nail trimming. This cordless Dremel includes a 45 degree angle guide designed just for pet nails, and it can be yours for just $31 today. You can also remove the guard and use this as a light-duty Dremel for any other tasks around the house.Read more...
Shortstop Pedro Florimon Pitches Perfect Inning, Then Socks Mighty Dinger
The dreaded Cardinals chased Phillies ace Jake Arrieta after just three innings in Friday night’s gloomy, rain-delayed tilt in St. Louis. The score was then 4-0; by the time reliever Drew Hutchison finished the sixth inning it was 9-2; the game finally became a laugher when Yacksel Rios allowed another three runs in…Read more...
This Deeply Discounted Cooler Can Keep Ice For Days
Just in time for beach season, this 20 can cooler is on sale today for $80, an all-time low, and about $20-$30 less than usual. Like a lot of these high density foam coolers you’ve been seeing, this one can keep ice frozen for days, so the drinks you pack in the morning will still be ice cold come the end of the day.
He Earned It
For exclusive videos, pictures, and more, like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter and Instagram. Send us your confidential tips at tips@deadspin.com, call our confidential tips hotline at (347) 746-8471, contact our writers directly, or use our anonymous SecureDrop system.Read more...
The WNBA Is Standing With Planned Parenthood
The New York Times reported today that the Trump administration plans to implement a rule banning reproductive healthcare providers, like Planned Parenthood, from getting certain federal funds if they provide abortion referrals. Hours later, WNBA President Lisa Borders put out this statement:
Astros Manager A.J. Hinch On Santa Fe Shooting: "Thoughts And Prayers Are Great, But They're Not Fixing The Problem"
This morning, a student at Houston-area Santa Fe High School murdered 10 people with a shotgun and a .38 caliber pistol. This is the 22nd time this year that someone with a gun has either killed or injured someone on a high school campus. Astros manager A.J. Hinch was asked about the deadly attack ahead of tonight’s…Read more...
A Frighteningly Accurate Analysis Of Mario Kart's Politics
Wario is a libertarian. Bowser is a fascist. We know this about them, in our hearts, but no one has ever sat down and categorized the political leanings of the Mushroom Kingdom’s best-known residents.Read more...
The 10 Best Deals of May 18, 2018
We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.
Smash Players Plead With Each Other To Please, For The Love Of God, Stop Smelling So Bad
At Jason “RustyTrombone” Husisian’s first Super Smash Bros. tournament at a hotel in Easton, Pennsylvania, he was focused on out-maneuvering his opponent when a nearby attendee’s smell filled his nostrils. “I get a whiff and I legit start coughing,” Husisian recalled. “It smelled like he worked in a crematorium.”Read more...
Tom Jurich Gets $7.2 Million, Lifetime Tickets In Louisville Settlement
If there’s one benefit to working in a leadership position at a major college sports program, and there are many, it’s that even if you end up disgraced and fired, you’re probably going to stay rich as hell.
WWE Is Poised To Hit The TV Rights Jackpot In Its Upcoming Domestic Contract
The Hollywood Reporter caused a stir on Wednesday when the publication’s Matthew Belloni tweeted that USA Network parent company NBC Universal is letting WWE’s SmackDown Live go to open bidding for a new contract. That was news, but Belloni noted that NBCU bowed out because it believed that the current offer for the…Read more...
Report: FAU Falsely Reported Title IX Numbers By Counting Dozens Of Non-Existent Athletes
FAU falsely reported the number of women playing for its athletic programs on its 2017 report to the Education Department, according to the Palm Beach Post.
Michigan State's Nassar Settlement Could Set A Troubling First Amendment Precedent
On Wednesday, Michigan State announced that it had settled with 332 survivors of Larry Nassar’s sexual abuse for $500 million. Of that enormous sum, $425 million will be divided among the women and girls, with $75 million set aside for any future Nassar survivors who come forward.
Former Pro Wrestler Tom Magee Severely Beaten By Six Men In Parking Spot Dispute
Former World’s Strongest Man contender, world powerlifting champion, and WWF veteran Tom Magee suffered serious injuries after he was beaten by six men in a dispute over a parking spot yesterday. CBS Los Angeles reports that the dispute broke out near Magee’s Mar Vista home, and neighbors described a grisly scene.…Read more...
Elfrid Payton's Hair Has Been Laid To Rest
Through all those tough years in Orlando to his current stint in Phoenix, the most notable feature of Elfrid Payton’s game has been his head. Not his “basketball IQ” or his “clutch mentality”—just that majestic drooping frond on top. Every season it protruded further past the point guard’s forehead. It looked like it…Read more...
A Ton Of Osprey Gear Is On Sale On Amazon Today
Osprey makes some of the most popular camping gear around, and nearly 200 of its products are on sale on Amazon for up to 25% off. These x% off sales on Amazon aren’t always actually good deals, but I spot checked a bunch of the gear in this sale, and every product I looked at was significantly cheaper than usual.
Pirates' Gregory Polanco Becomes The Subject Of A Weird PED Hoax
On Tuesday, just after Mariners second baseman Robinson Cano was suspended 80 games for failing a drug test, Pirates outfielder Gregory Polanco started to receive concerned texts from his friends and family in the Dominican Republic. A fake ESPN tweet began to circulate online, suggesting that Polanco would also be…Read more...
Cat Interrupts Tennis Match, Narrowly Escapes Overhead Smash
A doubles tennis match in Rome today was interrupted by a feline interloper. While Lukasz Kubot and Marcelo Melo played against Juan Sebastian Cabal and Robert Farah at the Foro Italico, a cute little cat ran across the court. Cat on the clay!Read more...
Georgia High School Tennis Players Punished After Posing With White Bags Over Their Heads
White tennis players from Telfair County High School in Georgia have been punished for posing for a photo in which they wore white bags over their heads with the eyes cut out. The photo, which was taken on Snapchat and then distributed on Facebook in the days after the tennis tournament, was taken after the Telfair…Read more...
Alex Ovechkin Has Been Eating This Carb Nightmare Before Every Home Game For 13 Years
Partly it’s superstition, and partly it’s because, as they say, he likes what he likes, Alex Ovechkin eats the exact same thing a few hours before every Capitals home game, and he’s been eating it since his rookie year. Athletes really are different from the rest of us.Read more...
Friday's Best Deals: REI's Anniversary Sale, Weighted Blankets, Brother Printer, and More
Celebrate the fact it’s Friday with a giant REI sale, a couple discounted weighted blankets, a Brother all-in-one laser printer, and more.
The Senior Vice President Of USA Gymnastics' Women's Program Has Been Asked To Resign
This week, USA Gymnastics is holding its training camp for the women’s national team at Flip Fest Camp in Tennessee. (Since ceasing to host camps at the Karolyi Ranch back in January, the camps have been held in different places.) And at this month’s camp, a bomb was dropped on national team members and their coaches:…Read more...
The Lightning Power Play Is A Thing To Behold
The numbers are intimidating. The Tampa Bay Lightning had the league’s third best power play during the regular season, at 23.9 percent. They have the best power play of any team left alive, at 30.8 percent. They are 6-of-14 on the power play against the Capitals. They have scored a power-play goal in nine straight…Read more...
JalopnikHere’s How Ford Used One Of The World’s Biggest Planes To Get F-150 Production Back Up Agai
Jalopnik Here’s How Ford Used One Of The World’s Biggest Planes To Get F-150 Production Back Up Again | Kotaku Hands On With Kingdom Hearts III, Finally | Gizmodo Space Rock Discovery Boosts Evidence for Planet Nine | Skillet ‘Brieing’ Is the New Bougie Way to Get High on MDMA |Read more...
Mookie Betts Played Kevin Gausman For A Fool
Mookie Betts, the best non–Mike Trout player in baseball who makes everything look impossibly easy, has a history of showing as little mercy as possible to the division rival Baltimore Orioles. He continued that trend during last night’s 6-2 victory over the O’s in Boston.
Under Oath, Reuben Foster's Ex-Girlfriend Recants Everything She Said
Reuben Foster’s ex-girlfriend said last month that she had lied when she told police that the San Francisco 49ers linebacker hit her, threw a dog across the room, and broke both her cell phones. On Thursday, 28-year-old Elissa Ennis said that again—this time under oath in a San Francisco courthouse at a preliminary…Read more...
Take a Breather Under This Pair of Weighted Blanket Deals
If you have trouble unwinding and turning off your brain at the end of the day, you’re gonna want to check out a weighted blanket. We’ve seen a lot of deals on 15 pound blankets lately, but today, ANJEE has not just a 15lb blanket, but a 20 pounder on sale as well. The 15lb is $110, but you can upgrade to five more…Read more...
The Lightning Scored Three Beautiful Goals And The Capitals Only Scored Two
It might seem a bit tedious to go through all the goals in the Lightning’s 4-2 Game 4 win over the Capitals on Thursday night, which evened the Eastern Conference Finals at two games apiece. But bear with me—in the tensest game of the series so far, every scoring play (minus the empty netter with two seconds to go)…Read more...
D-III Closer Gets Final Three Outs After Puking On The Infield
Rhodes College beat Franklin College 4-2 on the opening day of D-III regionals today, but it wasn’t without a ninth inning pitching performance that gave new meaning to the phrase “gutting it out.”Read more...
Buck Showalter Will Not Yield For Your Home Run Trot
A three-run dinger from Xander Bogaerts gave his Red Sox a 6-0 lead and chased Orioles pitcher Kevin Gausman in the fifth inning of tonight’s game. While Gausman himself couldn’t have been thrilled with his mistake, O’s manager Buck Showalter appeared even more disgusted, as he couldn’t even restrain himself until…Read more...
An NHL Prospect Is Reportedly Ruining His Career Over A Video Game Addiction
A recent first-round NHL draft pick might be spoiling his career prospects because of a video game addiction, according to some gossip passed along by hockey analyst Jeff Marek on the Sportsnet podcast 31 Thoughts. Marek, who declined to name the player, cited a conversation with his junior general manager, who said…Read more...
Heck Yeah, J.D. Martinez Is Smashing Dingers Like Clockwork Again
New Red Sox signing J.D. Martinez had a very, very good first month in a Boston uniform—an April OPS of .994 is nothing to sneeze at—but Just Dingers has truly been living up to his nickname since May began. And in his first at-bat tonight against the Orioles, J.D.’s fifth-gear hot streak got even more impressive.Read more...
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is The Idiot Racist Lawyer Sprinting Away From News Cameras
Aaron Schlossberg, the New York City lawyer who was caught on video dressing down restaurant employees for speaking Spanish and threatening to call U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement on them because he believed they were undocumented, is having a rough time since activist Shaun King released the clip Wednesday.…Read more...
JalopnikI’m A College Kid Looking For Something Quirky But Reliable!
Jalopnik I’m A College Kid Looking For Something Quirky But Reliable! What Car Should I Buy? | Two Cents How Much Money You Need to Save by the Time You’re 35 | Gizmodo Video Shows Florida Teacher Allegedly Drowning Two Raccoons in Science Class | Kotaku So, You’ve Seen The Captain America Twitter Joke |Read more...
Who on Earth Taught You People How to Eat?
Depending on where you’re eating and who you’re eating it with, the rules around food can be stunningly complex. The core concept, however, is that food is inserted into the mouth, and once it’s there, if you find it impossible to masticate with human teeth or discover the object to be a source of pain/bleeding, an…Read more...
Katie Ledecky Broke A World Record She's Already Broken Five Times Before
Nobody can be blamed for not paying too much attention to swimming in a when the Olympics aren’t going on, but whenever Katie Ledecky gets in the pool, I’ll make an exception.
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