Inconsolable Jeff Sessions Tries To Commit Suicide By Smoking Joint
by The Onion from on (#3RCHE)
WASHINGTON-Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. "I swore I'd never take the coward's way out, but what choice do I have?" said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed"