Article 50AGD ‘We Have Coronavirus Under Control,’ Announces CDC Director As Nose Slowly Transforms Into Pangolin Snout

‘We Have Coronavirus Under Control,’ Announces CDC Director As Nose Slowly Transforms Into Pangolin Snout

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The Onion
from The Onion on (#50AGD)
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ATLANTA-As gasps of horror resonated throughout the crowd of reporters, CDC director Robert Redfield announced Thursday that the spread of coronavirus was under control while his nose slowly transformed into a pangolin snout. "I want to assure the public that we acted quickly and aggressively to halt the progress of"

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