Article 5FZ4F Finance Whiz Predicts The Dow Will Open At 9:30 A.M. Tomorrow

Finance Whiz Predicts The Dow Will Open At 9:30 A.M. Tomorrow

by
from The Onion on (#5FZ4F)
cf3ddrdln2fsf0jqp2rt.jpg

AVON, CT-Making the proclamation with 99% certainty," finance whiz Seth McTurner predicted Tuesday that the Dow would open at 9:30 a.m. tomorrow. I'm calling it now: The Dow will open tomorrow morning at half past nine," said McTurner, whose words were heeded by thousands of investors across the country who...

Read more...

External Content
Source RSS or Atom Feed
Feed Location https://www.theonion.com/rss
Feed Title The Onion
Feed Link https://theonion.com/
Reply 0 comments