Article 65F6X Tucker Carlson Screaming In Agony That He Feels Crime Crawling All Over Him

Tucker Carlson Screaming In Agony That He Feels Crime Crawling All Over Him

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from The Onion on (#65F6X)
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BOCA GRANDE, FL-As he tore off his shirt and shouted that his body was covered in heinous transgressions of the law, Tucker Carlson screamed in agony Friday, claiming that he felt crime crawling all over him. Please, someone, get these crimes off me!" yelled the 53-year-old television host, who reportedly scratched...

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