Thanks for coming to help. No, we can't say why we called – it's classified

Working under a cone of silence isn't easy if you get smart

On Call Register readers know the secret of tech support is that it's often made harder than necessary by the very customers who require it. Which is why each Friday we offer a fresh episode of On Call, our reader-contributed tales of icky incidents and hidden horrors that we hope create a chance to share misery in company....