Article 6T65X Mysterious Illness In Congo Kills Dozens

Mysterious Illness In Congo Kills Dozens

by
The Onion Staff
from The Onion on (#6T65X)

An unidentified disease with flu-like symptoms has killed dozens of people in the Democratic Republic of Congo, with unknown illness having led to the death of at least 79 people and sickened 376. What do you think?

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Big deal, I've had flu-like symptoms since 2007."

Oscar Lewis, Memorabilia Appraiser
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Why can't a mysterious illness do something good for once."

Selma Briseno, Sponge Wringer
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Can't epidemiologists just learn to accept death without always asking how' and why?'"

Alejandro Corona, File Corrupter

The post Mysterious Illness In Congo Kills Dozens appeared first on The Onion.

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