Japanese Monk RacksBrain For Haiku That Will KnockThem On Their Asses

HIRAIZUMI-

CH, NISHIIWAI,

IWATE, JAPAN-

Struggling to decide

whether one on fall or spring

would rock their shit more,

Zen monk Ken Ito

strained for a haiku to knock

them on their asses.

I could mess them up

with that Bash one about

the full moon's splendor,"

the Buddhist monk said

Wednesday, seeing a tour group

on the temple grounds,

trawling through his mind

for the best contemplations

on life's fleetingness

in syllabic sets

of five-seven-five that could

blow their fucking minds.

Then again maybe

I hit them with Rykan

on the transient

dew on lotus leaves

in the darkened mountainside.

Bet that fucks them up."

At press time, after

the monk had found the perfect

haiku, he remarked,

Ah, summer grasses!

All that is still remaining

Of warriors' dreams,"

only to see that

the group had gone, leaving him

feeling like an ass.

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