Article 416JZ FAA Study Finds 64% Of Engine Failures Caused By Henchman Being Kicked Into Turbine

FAA Study Finds 64% Of Engine Failures Caused By Henchman Being Kicked Into Turbine

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The Onion
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WASHINGTON-Confirming the link between emergency landings and high-stakes brawls on an airplane's wing, the Federal Aviation Administration released a new study Friday claiming that 64 percent of all jetliner engine failures are caused by henchmen being kicked into the planes' turbines. "Our data revealed that nearly"

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