This is not, repeat, not an April Fools' Day joke: 5 UK broadband vendors agree to pay YOU daily rate for fscked internet

Engineer didn't show? Service later than planned? Providers need to cough up from today

Relax, alopecia sufferers or those unfortunate enough to be genetically pre-disposed to baldness. You'll never again - or at least not nearly as much - need to pull your hair out in frustration over crap broadband services."