Article 4DX7G Tesla Posts Massive First Quarter Loss After Self-Driving Car Absconds With $702 Million in Cash

Tesla Posts Massive First Quarter Loss After Self-Driving Car Absconds With $702 Million in Cash

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The Onion
from The Onion on (#4DX7G)
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PALO ALTO, CA-Assuring investors that the rogue vehicle would be found and reprogrammed as soon as possible, Tesla announced Thursday that the company had posted a massive first-quarter loss after a self-driving car absconded with $702 million in cash. "Financially speaking, we could have never foreseen that one of"

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