Never thought we'd write this headline: Under Siege Steven Seagal is not Above The Law, must fork out $314,000 after boosting crypto-coin biz

D-list cinematic eye-gouger catches heat for million-dollar funbucks bung

Improbable Hollywood ninja Steven Seagal has been fined by America's financial watchdog for hiding details about a paid promotion he did for a crypto-coin investment upstart."