Article 5208C ‘I Can Still Cook This, Right,’ Asks Woman Holding Up Writhing, Screaming Potato With 8-Foot-Long Roots

‘I Can Still Cook This, Right,’ Asks Woman Holding Up Writhing, Screaming Potato With 8-Foot-Long Roots

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OnionNews on Local, shared by OnionNews to The Oni
from The Onion on (#5208C)
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JERSEY CITY, NJ-Shrugging while pulling the several-months-old vegetable out of a bag on her counter, local woman Janice Freidman reportedly inspected a writhing, screaming potato with 8-foot-long roots Friday before deeming it "probably still good." "I bet it's fine-if I just cut off the spiked, muscular tendrils and"

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