Tim Dowling: the middle child’s back from the US. Must. Act. Normal

I want to show that we haven't gone insane in his absence. It doesn't help that he arrived so close to pickling day

I am in my office shed, rushing to get some work done in order to clear my morning. An hour will do it, I think. Plenty of time.

I send my wife a message that says, Text me when you've got him." A few seconds later she replies with the words: Nearly home."