Tips For Getting Involved At Your Child’s School

Serving as a parent volunteer is a great way to bolster your child's education as well as give back. The Onion shares tips for getting involved at your child's school.

Donate unwanted frogs and other dissectable specimens.

Establish open communication with your child's teacher by emailing them to complain about how math is different now.

Read The Art Of War and run the school dance bake sale accordingly.

Buy a pair of binoculars and serve as an unofficial recess monitor from your car.

Prepare your child's class a nutritious snack of turnips, cabbage, and jellied eel to sustain them for their after-school shift at the mill.

Get involved in drama club by beating out Jessica Porter for the lead in Bye Bye Birdie.

Donate a teacher.

Drop acid with the other cool parents before the kids' hand-bell recital. What are you, scared? No way we get caught.

Go beyond doing all of your child's homework by doing every other student's too.

The post Tips For Getting Involved At Your Child's School appeared first on The Onion.