Political Profile: Markwayne Mullin

Markwayne Mullin has been nominated to succeed Kristi Noem as the secretary of homeland security. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the senator from Oklahoma.

Ethnicity: Brother-in-Law

Raised By: Momwayne, Dadwayne

Known For: Being forcibly dragged off your flight

Humanizing Quality: Hates Rand Paul

Dream Job: special envoy for the Shield of the Americas

Fighting Style: Brazilian why-I-oughta

Could Pull Off An Earring: You know what? Yeah.

Difference From Noem: Would have killed the dog with bare hands

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