Paramedics Praised For Being Too Late To Save Lindsey Graham

WASHINGTON-Emphasizing that every second counted during a cardiac episode, doctors on Monday praised first responders for being too late to save Lindsay Graham from an aortic dissection. Paramedics had a very short window to save Sen. Graham, and thankfully they did not make it in time," said George Washington University Hospital cardiologist Dr. Eric Fallstaff, who suggested that EMTs should receive special commendations for arriving at the four-term Republican senator's house long after they could have successfully delivered life-saving care. In cases as severe as this, the only way to save a patient is through open-heart surgery. Thankfully, by the time 911 dispatchers even got the call, medical intervention would have been futile." Fallstaff went on to praise his fellow doctors' bravery and quick thinking for pronouncing Graham dead shortly after.

The post Paramedics Praised For Being Too Late To Save Lindsey Graham appeared first on The Onion.