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by Simon Sharwood on (#3H55C)
N00bs also failed to spot flaming PC, blamed mouse instead On-Call Welcome again to On-Call, The Register's free therapy session for those who perform tech support chores and need to get the worst ones off their chest.…
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The Register
| Link | https://www.theregister.com/ |
| Feed | http://www.theregister.co.uk/headlines.atom |
| Copyright | Copyright © 2025, Situation Publishing |
| Updated | 2025-09-15 11:01 |
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by Katyanna Quach on (#3H527)
How the f*ck did you get that score on Q*bert? It turns out not all AIs are created equal Video An AI bot managed to exploit a hidden bug in popular 1980s arcade game Q*bert to rack up impossibly high scores after being programmed using evolution strategy algorithms.…
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by Simon Sharwood on (#3H4Y6)
Worried it's poisoning polity, Twitter seeks metrics to measure its health Twitter's decided the time is right to measure "our contribution to the overall health of the public conversation".…
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by Iain Thomson on (#3H4VS)
No no, you can't see them, unless you attack. Which you won't. So you can't see 'em Vids Russian Federation president Putin has used his annual state-of-the-nation address to show off the latest additions to Russia's weapon's catalog and to warn the Western powers that his country will not be trifled with.…
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by Kieren McCarthy on (#3H4SB)
We do virtual reality, not fake reality, alternate-reality biz claims in lawsuit Comment Virtual reality clown Magic Leap did not try to reverse engineer Microsoft's HoloLens technology, the upstart stated in its lawsuit against Todd Keil, its former head of security.…
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by Simon Sharwood on (#3H4PM)
Q4 and FY18 results beat expectations, with end-user compute starring VMware might just have found a way to stay relevant as containers threaten virtualization.…
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by Kieren McCarthy on (#3H4MX)
Put the letter on the pile next to the soiled #OneMoreVote petition More than 75 mayors and city officials across America this week signed a letter asking that the nation's net neutrality safeguards remain in place. Again.…
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by Shaun Nichols on (#3H4K4)
Canucks to pull plug on ill-fated mismanaged govt IT project Canada is about ready to pull the plug on its IBM-built error-plagued Phoenix payroll system that has cost the nation nearly CAN$1bn ($790m).…
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by Shaun Nichols on (#3H4G4)
Just go install Intel's patch while we hunt the next CPU-level security flaw in Intel's silicon Microsoft is pushing out another round of security updates to mitigate data-leaking Spectre side-channel vulnerabilities in modern Intel x64 chips.…
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by Iain Thomson on (#3H4DD)
Add remote-code execution hole to mass-revocation drama The websites for HTTPS certificate reseller Trustico, and one of its partners, SSL Direct, took a dive on Thursday – after a critical and trivial-to-exploit security flaw in Trustico.com was revealed on Twitter.…
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by Shaun Nichols on (#3H47Z)
Big Blue is all for rules cracking down on ads, social media Add IBM to the list of tech companies putting their support behind America's Stop Enabling Sex Traffickers Act (SESTA).…
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by Iain Thomson on (#3H45Z)
Memcache attacks are going to be this year's thing What's purported to be the world's largest distributed denial of service attack to date – measuring 1.35Tbps – knocked GitHub offline for a few minutes yesterday.…
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by Rebecca Hill on (#3H3PA)
Details of secretive direction have been under wraps for years The government has finally made public a secretive direction that requires snoop oversight bodies to monitor spies’ potential participation in criminality.…
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by Chris Mellor on (#3H3KF)
Integral part of VxRack FLEX hyperconverged kit henceforth Dell will only sell its hugely scalable ScaleIO virtual SAN software product inside its VxRAck FLEX hyperconverged system from now on – the software-only version has been canned.…
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by Rebecca Hill on (#3H3GK)
It's OK, it was only partial driving licence information Embattled credit-reporting company Equifax has done some data crunching and discovered another 2.4 million people that had their information slurped by hackers.…
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by Chris Mellor on (#3H3A5)
Tectonic shifts in CSPs and hyperscalar buying Server shipments boomed in 2017's fourth quarter, with total revenues bouncing 26.4 per cent on the prior year and unit sales stepping up 11 per cent. Hyperscalar and cloud service provider customer buying patterns are causing tectonic shifts in the market.…
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by Andrew Orlowski on (#3H3A7)
Break 'em up, nothing else works Google's vertical search tormentors in Europe have called for Alphabet's cash cow to be broken up, arguing that Google's solution hasn't improved competition.…
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by Chris Mellor on (#3H36T)
The China Syndrome Intel is discussing selling 3D NAND wafers to China's Tsinghua Unigroup, the same company US government barred from buying Intel's flash partner Micron in 2015.…
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by Gareth Corfield on (#3H314)
UK-made bird forms first of 5-strong planned constellation The RAF has acquired a satellite that can beam live video footage from space, the head of the air force told an industry gathering in Surrey today.…
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by Paul Kunert on (#3H2W1)
Or customers can... walk to a new provider without penalty Ofcom is tightening the screws – sort of – on broadband providers that play fast and loose with speed promises by imposing a deadline to meet service obligations or allow customers to walk away without a penalty.…
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by Rebecca Hill on (#3H2QK)
Thames Valley Police a hive of activity after the a-pollen crime The cops have been called in to investigate a major bee heist after 40 hives were reported stolen from an Oxfordshire farm.…
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by Andrew Orlowski on (#3H2ND)
It's a massacre on the wrist Analysis Did you notice anything else missing from Mobile World Congress this year? Apart from any interesting phones?…
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by Gareth Corfield on (#3H2KJ)
Considerable embiggenment at dust cleaner firm British sucker-tech biz Dyson’s pivot to electric cars continues as the company announced today that it is creating 300 new jobs in its ‘leccy vehicle division.…
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by Andrew Orlowski on (#3H2J1)
Duller than a Dull Thing Comment No, dear reader. You didn't forget to set the alarm, and you haven't just slept through Mobile World Congress. If 2018 feels different, it may be because the phone industry's biggest annual get-together failed to produce any interesting new phones.…
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by Chris Mellor on (#3H2E7)
Get the data out of memory faster Analysis Getting data into and out of memory is like getting books into and out of bookshelves. The more books you can hold at once, the faster you can do the job. Someone able to hold only one book at a time is going to be far slower than another person capable of holding a stack of eight at a time or, with high-bandwidth memory (HBM) in mind, 1,024.…
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by Anne Currie on (#3H2E9)
Software developers Kant duck their responsibilities any more This March I'll be co-running the first ethics track for the tech conference QCon London. We've had so much enthusiasm that QCon New York has added ethics too (Americans are notoriously behind the curve).…
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by Chris Mellor on (#3H2CV)
Rivalries intensify in what is now a two-horse race Analysis Both Scality and Cloudian have received fresh funding as they race towards an IPO, acquisition or startup trash can – the three outcomes of the object storage endgame.…
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by Marcus Gibson on (#3H2BC)
The number of successful UK spinouts is waning The number of university spinouts is falling since the glory days of the late 1990s onwards.…
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by Simon Sharwood on (#3H28Q)
And there's worse to come between now and 2022 for all client devices bar typoslabs Desktop PC shipments dipped below 100 million in 2017 and there's worse to come across the personal computing device market according to analyst firm IDC.…
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by Richard Chirgwin on (#3H28R)
And no, you're not supposed to be able to do that Vid The Spectre design flaws in modern CPUs can be exploited to punch holes through the walls of Intel's SGX secure environments, researchers claim.…
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by Simon Sharwood on (#3H26N)
CFO's biggest hassle is keeping up with sales commissions now that it's back in black Salesforce has reported a cracking quarter and financial year, but also revealed growth is slowing.…
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by Kieren McCarthy on (#3H26P)
Council of Europe and trade bosses have had enough of King Battistelli Pressure is continuing to build on the European Patent Office (EPO) over its treatment of staff and continued refusal to accept the results of an independent tribunal.…
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by Simon Sharwood on (#3H23M)
And loads up the migration cannon to aim at VMware Microsoft's revealed a plan to make Ubuntu 18.04 a "first-class" guest under Hyper-V.…
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by Iain Thomson on (#3H222)
Probably-Russian Fancy Bear team fingered for attack The German Interior ministry has confirmed that it has identified a serious attack against its servers, amidst reports that the culprits were the Russian APT28 – aka Fancy Bear – hacking group.…
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by Richard Chirgwin on (#3H20V)
Harvard bods warn: if you want to avoid a big outage, use more than one DNS provider The world's top eight DNS providers now control 59 per cent of name resolution for the biggest Websites - and that puts the Web at risk, according to a group of Harvard University researchers.…
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by Iain Thomson on (#3H1Y5)
World's largest aircraft goes for a very gentle trundle The world's largest aircraft, designed to one day fling rockets into space, has tested out its taxiing capabilities at the Mojave Air and Space Port in New Mexico.…
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by Shaun Nichols on (#3H1SM)
Allegations aren't just grim, they're Uber-bad A former Google engineer is suing the US advertising giant after undergoing what she says was years of sexual harassment and retaliation from coworkers.…
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by Richard Chirgwin on (#3H1RB)
And they're way too loud ... unless dark matter is involved A group of US researchers working at a remote site in north-west Australia have identified signals from the oldest stars ever observed, born roughly 180 million years after the Big Bang.…
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by Shaun Nichols on (#3H1PT)
Straight Path veered off promises of 5G coverage Verizon's $3.1bn Straight Path gobble got a little more expensive this week, thanks to a $614m fine dished out by America's broadband watchdog, the Federal Communications Commission.…
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by John Leyden on (#3H1N4)
Trustico, DigiCert come to blows as browsers prepare to snub Symantec-brand SSL Customers of HTTPS certificate reseller Trustico are reeling after being told their website security certs – as many as 23,000 – will be rendered useless within the next 24 hours.…
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by Shaun Nichols on (#3H1HY)
Chocolate fac crack a whack at Slack pack with yak yak stack Google has moved its Slack rival out of beta and into general availability.…
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by Kieren McCarthy on (#3H19D)
It's a dog's dinner that could cripple websites Analysis The US House of Representatives has overwhelmingly passed a bill aimed at tackling online sex traffickers, but which critics warn will have little effect on curbing the vile trade and could instead undermine free speech on the internet.…
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by Shaun Nichols on (#3H13R)
US tech hotbed steps up with strictest traffic protections yet The US state of Washington is on the verge of passing a sweeping new set of net neutrality safeguards that would apply to all carriers within its borders.…
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by Andrew Orlowski on (#3H110)
We report, you don't decide you can distribute, telly giant asserts in NY appeals court A US appeals court has backed Fox News in the broadcaster's copyright-infringement battle against online telly streamer TVEyes.…
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by Rebecca Hill on (#3H0NF)
NHS Digital boss suggests public concern has caused 'lack of balanced debate' The NHS has said it will continue sharing data with the Home Office for immigration enforcement, despite MPs calling for the government to put an immediate stop to the transfer.…
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by Chris Mellor on (#3H0F1)
But disk shipped 10X more exabytes than flash Customer spending on SSDs finally ruled the storage roost in 2017 but vendors still shipped more than ten times as much disk capacity as flash.…
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by Rebecca Hill on (#3H0BT)
Privacy International cross-examine GCHQ's star witness over section 94 directions Privacy International has slammed the UK's spy agencies for failing to keep a proper paper trail over what data telcos were asked to provide under snooping laws, following its first ever cross-examination of a GCHQ witness.…
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by Richard Speed on (#3H056)
The aliens are coming! Just add water... Maybe Demonstrating that scientists can extrapolate with the best of them, researchers have speculated that long dormant microbes on the Red Planet might reawaken with the introduction of liquid water.…
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by Rebecca Hill on (#3H001)
Annual report reveals boost in complaints, breach notifications The Irish Data Protection Commissioner received 79 per cent more complaints last year than in 2016, while data breach notifications rose 26 per cent.…
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by John Leyden on (#3GZX1)
Claw back your stuff without paying asshat for pricey cracker White hats have released a free decryption tool for GandCrab ransomware, preventing the nasty spreaders of the DIY malware from asking their victims for money.…
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