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The Baltimore Ravens announced today that they have agreed to a one-year deal with a quarterback who is not Colin Kaepernick.Read more...

Johnny Manziel’s odd redemption tour continued today when he appeared on The Dan Patrick Show. During the segment he was asked what he would go back and change about his rookie season if he had the chance, and his response was further proof that absolutely no one is incapable of clowning the Browns:

Lacrosse was played by Native American nations across North America long before it was colonized by Europeans. But despite Native people’s historical and cultural connection to the game, they were periodically banned from playing before the 1973 American Indian Religious Freedom Act restored Native peoples’ right to…Read more...

Among the many reasons you’d be galactically screwed if you lined up on the perimeter to defend an NBA player, speed is the scariest. Before you stand some of the tallest, longest, twitchiest, most volatile athletes in the world, with good options available at every juncture: stop dead and pop a jumper over you, put…Read more...

The Sixers do not have Joel Embiid for the foreseeable future. He’s out after surgery for a fractured orbital bone. So far, that has not mattered.Read more...

Upgrade to a 5K LG monitor, gear up with a Bosch tool combo kit, finally file your taxes, and find the rest of today’s best deals.Read more...

Over the weekend, Andre Agassi, who joined forces with 12-time grand slam winner Novak Djokovic last May in order to help the Serb get out of a deep slump, announced the two had parted ways.Read more...

In a game loaded with playoff and seeding implications, Predators-Panthers had an ending that should terrify everyone that a rough goaltender interference call could fuck over any team at any time. Isn’t hockey great?!Read more...

If you haven’t replaced your metal spring mattress with a giant block of foam that you bought on the internet, what are you even doing with your life? Amazon’s currently marking Sweetnight 10' gel memory foam mattresses to under $430. Featuring a dual-sided system (one side is a pillow top, the other is firm), a queen…Read more...

The Mavericks are currently treading toilet water, with no real motivation to win, but tonight featured a few cool things: a victory over the Trail Blazers, and, more importantly, this nifty Dennis Smith Jr. dunk, assisted by none other than Dennis Smith Jr. himself.

Club América coach Miguel Herrera claimed that Toronto police assaulted his players—goalkeeper Agustín Marchesín and defender Bruno Valdez, along with assistant coach Giber Becerra—during halftime of the team’s 3-1 CONCACAF Champions League semifinal loss to Toronto FC tonight. Toronto coach Greg Vanney disputed his…Read more...

In his first at-bat since earning a win in his first major-league start two days ago, two-way rookie phenom Shohei Ohtani smacked one back to center field for his first major-league home run:Read more...

Would you like to see the empty eyes of a man who’s almost positive that he’s just fucked up, with nothing left for him to do about it? From the second inning of tonight’s Red Sox-Marlins game, here’s Chris Sale after leaving one right over the plate for Justin Bour:

Reigning National League MVP Giancarlo Stanton is already a persona non grata in the Bronx as Yankees fans reacted to the slugger’s five-strikeout day against the Rays with a chorus of boos.Read more...

Nobody will say for certain what Max Holloway weighed when he agreed to fight Khabib Nurmagomedov at UFC 223, but he has until Friday afternoon to get down to 155 pounds if he wants a shot at the UFC lightweight title. That’s 10 pounds heavier than his typical fighting weight, though he’s a big featherweight and it…Read more...

The NBA announced today that they’ve suspended Mavericks forward Nerlens Noel for five games, reportedly following a third positive test for marijuana, a drug that is legal or decriminalized in much of the country. That alone is not a big deal, but Noel’s suspension—which will see him out for the conclusion of the…Read more...

The New England Patriots spent a first- and third-round pick to get Brandin Cooks from the Saints last offseason, and now they’ve dealt the receiver (along with a fourth-round pick) to the Rams in exchange for a first- and sixth-rounder. That was fast!Read more...

Here are the facts: Sri Lanka recently became one of the latest countries to launch a show in Simon Cowell’s Got Talent! series, which is aptly called Sri Lanka’s Got Talent!; Sudarshana Deshappriya is someone who has Got Talent, martial arts talent to be specific; Deshappriya ran into some painful-looking trouble…Read more...

Chris Cillizza’s job isn’t as easy as it seems, although it also isn’t nearly difficult enough to justify the salary he receives for doing it. What that job is even supposed to be is kind of a moving target, to be honest, but much of what Cillizza does in his current position as a political reporter and…Read more...

The judge in the Bill Cosby criminal case ruled today that jurors can hear about the settlement the comedian paid the woman who told police that he drugged and assaulted her. Judge Steven O’Neill also ruled that jurors can hear testimony from a woman, Marguerite “Margo” Jackson; she is expected to say that Andrea…Read more...

The St. Louis Cardinals’ Tommy Pham, who recently turned 30, had his breakout season in 2017 when he hit 23 homers, stole 25 bases, achieved a .411 on-base percentage. And yet, he began the year by being optioned to Triple A. Pham hasn’t forgotten.Read more...

At Overwatch League team New York Excelsior’s first-ever New York fan meet-and-greet, a preteen girl in braces broke out sobbing after coming face-to-face with player Joong-hwa “Janus” Song, a sub. Janus doesn’t play much. When he’s called in, he almost exclusively plays the ape hero Winston, and only on specific…Read more...

In his long and illustrious career, Cristiano Ronaldo has won a billion trophies and scored a zillion goals. Today, just now, at the ripe old age of 33, he has scored one of his most sensational, athletic, instantly iconic goals in Real Madrid’s Champions League match against Juventus:

After a positive drug test for a performance-enhancing substance, Canelo Álvarez has officially withdrawn from his May 5 rematch with unified middleweight champion Gennady Golovkin, whom he fought to a controversial draw last September.

This golf ball’s trajectory will make your emotions soar, only to very quickly leave them afloat in mid-air, wondering where and how to land.Read more...

Last February, the families of Eduardo Rivero and Emilio Jesus Macias, the two men who died in a boat crash alongside Marlins ace José Fernández, filed suit against the Fernández estate, each seeking $2 million in damages. Autopsy results showed that Fernández had a BAC of .147 as well as cocaine in his system at the…Read more...

Despite the parade of nor’easters that have recently struck the East Coast, spring has officially arrived, and with it comes the promise of camping and backpacking trips. But before you set out on your first backpacking trip of the season, let’s review the gear you should be packing and what condition that gear should…Read more...

Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we’re talking about the Masters, walking, goth girlfriends, steak, and more.

Do you care about a slight uniform change for the NFL’s most anonymous team? I bet you do.Read more...

Rick Pitino’s been out of the coaching game not even a full year, but that itch is already starting to come back. Whether anybody’s willing to scratch it is another question entirely.Read more...

Here at Gizmodo Media Group, we have a functional and powerful union, one that protects us from, say, reading scripts that look like hostage statements or really doing anything debasing and against our will. So while our participation in the video at the top of this post wasn’t exactly involuntary, we did not expect…Read more...

I’ve always thought Easter was a bullshit holiday. Unlike most proper holidays, you don’t get a day off of work or school. The Easter Egg hunt holds neither the candy quality nor the door-to-door salesman charm of trick-or-treating. Peeps are a culinary atrocity. And I don’t look good in pastels. Easter is the…Read more...

Donte DiVincenzo was not a sophomore bench player on Monday night. He was when the game started, but by the final horn he was the man who had saved a national championship for Villanova.Read more...

There’s a buzz around this year’s Masters. Tiger Woods is back. “This might be the wildest year in Masters history,” CBS Sports reports. But the biggest news out of Augusta National this week is this: A popular, stupid beer catchphrase has been banned.Read more...

If you’ve been following the ongoing developments in the Larry Nassar scandal and Michigan State University’s sexual-assault crisis, you’ve recently become familiar with the phrase “#SpartansWill.” If you’ve spent any time around East Lansing, you already knew about it, because it’s all over town. You see it on…Read more...

Over the weekend, The Sandlot turned 25 years old. Major League Baseball is celebrating the anniversary of its release throughout the season with theme nights at nearly all of the stadiums. (The Brewers went above and beyond with their homage.) Despite growing up a devoted baseball fan—with aspirations beyond my…Read more...

io9 Zachary Quinto Hints at the Future of the Star Trek Movieverse | Jalopnik This Track Day Crash Lawsuit Could Be Bad News For Track Events Everywhere | Kotaku Well, This Was A Pretty Ridiculous Far Cry 5 Bug | Lifehacker Watch YouTube Videos Without Ads for Free With This Android App |Read more...

ESPN’s Kevin Seifert has a fun story today about NFL coaches’ continued and collective refusal to allow themselves the ability to consult live game footage on the sidelines. Why don’t they want what would seem to be a very helpful bit of technology at their disposal? Because it would make their jobs too easy.

Positive thinking is a powerful thing. Or at least regression to the mean is.

You’ll see Andre Burakovsky’s goal being referred to as a goal of the year candidate, because A) it was very pretty, and B) hockey writers have a distinct lack of pithy descriptors for really good goals. It’s sort of silly, because there’s no actual official “goal of the year” award! But at least it makes more sense…Read more...

Replace those socks that got eaten by a dog or lost under the bed during this one-day sale from Amazon. Pick up dress socks, crew socks, no-shows, and more styles in a ton of different colors and patterns for 40% off. But these prices will disappear quicker than your new favorite pair of socks to the dryer.

For the bulk of the first half, tonight’s NCAA men’s basketball championship was Michigan’s game—not by more than a few points, not convincingly, but it was. With six minutes remaining, though, Donte DiVincenzo hit a three to deliver Villanova its first lead since the opening seconds, and then he sewed up the rest of…Read more...

This isn’t as iconic an entry into the genre of unexpected inside-the-park home runs as, say, this Prince Fielder gem or this Jhonny Peralta one, but it’s still pretty dang good: Edwin Encarnacion tonight, with his first inside-the-parker in more than a decade, thanks to a little defensive fuck-up by left fielder…Read more...

Not everything about the Houston Astros’ pregame celebration today went exactly as planned—they probably would have preferred a little less wind for the unveiling of their World Series banner—but the first pitch was legitimately touching. Former first base coach Rich Dauer did the honors, five months after he was…Read more...

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The Overwatch League’s stage playoffs are expanding again, this time adding another team to the mix and removing the first-round bye for the top-seeded team in the league.

COLUMBUS, Ohio — Muffet McGraw’s husband Matt clearly knows the drill by now. He beamed as he watched his wife of 40 years hold court with reporters after the greatest coaching win of her career. She wore a black dress that she’d bought especially for what turned out to be her second national championship, her…Read more...

The Detroit Tigers had an Opening Day walk-off win taken away from them Friday when what looked to be a safe, 10th-inning slide into home from Nicholas Castellanos was overturned on review. If you believe Tigers manager Ron Gardenhire, MLB admitted the call was botched.Read more...

Dele Alli scored twice in Tottenham’s 3-1 victory over Chelsea this weekend. His first goal was a beaut, but as Chris Applegate noted on Twitter, even more gorgeous than the goal itself were the photos, featuring the home Chelsea crowd’s reaction. So many scowls. So many impolite hand gestures. Truly art at its finest.Read more...

Grizzly bears, dogs, and even cockroaches fart. Do sea anemones? Nope. As for spiders, no one knows.