The Register

Borg thinks own Spark voice assistant knows how to behave in the office, but we've seen it and … meh VID Cisco will shortly give the world a voice assistant it believes has a shot at making life uncomfortable for Siri, Cortana and Alexa in the office.…

Except you there in the UK: you've got no chance of catching Tiangong-1 debris If you read the New Zealand Herald, you're (a) probably a Kiwi, and (b) building a bunker because you expect a Chinese space station to drop on your head.…

200 Gbps per wavelength on sub cables, 400 on metro networks, 600 in data centres Two years after it first demonstrated its highest-capacity modulation scheme, Nokia has announced its release as a product.…

Users will be permitted to run them in parallel with NBN connections, but they've been marked for extinction Horror stories about poor installation experiences for Australia's National Broadband Network (NBN) are everywhere, which might be making businesses reluctant to give up old but reliable services. To get those customers over the line, nbn™, the company building and operating the NBN, has announced it will let business customers keep their ISDN services in parallel with an NBN connection until they're ready to migrate.…

Rival OURSA conf found 14 in five days after only Monica Lewinsky made RSA's agenda Day one of the annual RSA conference in San Francisco on April 17 will have some competition after a group of female infosec professionals decided to hold their own shindig - titled Our Security Advocates or OURSA - to showcase the work of women in the field.…

TensorFlow APIs are being used for object detection Google is working with the US Department of Defense to develop AI algorithms to identify objects in videos taken by drones.…

A swarm is an fleet of 40 drones or more, apparently US warplanners are going to have to deal with an increasing drone threat, both from off-the-shelf hardware today to possibly more intelligent dangers.…

For example: South Carolina, Virginia, North Dakota and Kentucky Legislators in Rhode Island have come up with a novel way to deal with online pornography: require ISPs to block sexual content and then require consumers to pay a $20 "digital access fee" if they want to see smut.…

Hundreds of workers said to be on the chopping block HPE has confirmed plans to outsource its field support business to Unisys.…

Cult of personality meet shameful response The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) has finally decided to address the months-long lack of telecoms service in Puerto Rico, one day before its chair visits the storm-ravaged island.…

Can't we just get along? At a sunny California inn with hors d'oeuvres, most definitely At the Open Source Leadership Summit in Sonoma, California, on Tuesday, members of the open source community gathered under a big tent.…

Democracy being what it is, some folks are opposed More than one hundred organizations called on US congress to fast-lane legislation on self-driving cars.…

Old RIM job on Zuck's bucks, WhatsApp, Instagram named Updated Smartphone market wraith BlackBerry has launched a legal offensive accusing Facebook, WhatsApp, and Instagram of patent infringement.…

So much for the supercycle "The iPhone X cost twice [as much as my old smartphone] but isn't twice as good. It's for the Rolex wearers," concluded Alistair Dabbs after a fortnight with Apple's flagship.…

Law review kicked off to write new statutes The Law Commission is to conduct a study into British driving laws with the aim of making sure humans can still be blamed for road accidents caused by driverless cars – and criminalising hackers who target autonomous vehicles.…

Miner prying by minor spying A sophisticated mystery hacker group is using tactics more familiar to the world of cyber espionage to earn millions through mining malware.…

Latest trials will expose capital to delights of robot chauffeuring World+dog will be let loose with Level 4 driverless cars in London, the Greenwich Gateway consortium has declared.…

Electoral Reform Society says UK.gov proposal is 'dangerous' Mandatory voter ID trials are "dangerous" and won't stop the main cause of election fraud, UK government has been told.…

USS Lexington discovered 500 miles off Australia Pics Billionaire Microsoftie Paul Allen has found yet another sunken warship – an amazingly well-preserved Second World War US aircraft carrier.…

So much for keeping up with the cutting edge, eh? Staying up to date with the latest tech seems to be proving challenging for the UK's data protection watchdog.…

911 transcripts tell of staff lying on ground, heads bleeding Apple's $5bn Norman Foster-designed "spaceship" HQ isn't finished yet, but it's already taking out puny humans.…

Former chairman banned from holding another financial role An inquiry into The Co-operative Bank's financial collapse is to open four years after it was first announced by former UK chancellor George Osborne.…

Wait. Don't you do those already? Bose's noise-jamming headphones are ubiquitous with business travellers and also popular among commuters, but the 11,000-strong company will face designer competition from Apple in a battle that pits two of the industry's most-respected engineering teams against each other.…

It was your plan all along! 'Oh no it wasn't.' Oh yes it was. 'CFIUS is BEHIND you!' Qualcomm took a deep breath, counted to three and responded to Broadcom's weekend broadside before postponing its stockholder meeting by a month.…

Daily backups? We've heard of them The UK's self-proclaimed number one website provider, 123 Reg, is having yet another very bad day, although arguably not as bad as those of its long-suffering customers.…

Let's go to all-flash arrays' house instead Despite the storage market growing 13.7 per cent annually in the fourth 2017 quarter, the external array section grew less than 2 per cent and is forecast to decline, according to IDC's worldwide enterprise storage systems tracker.…

Architecting for change In large organisations, the question is rarely “what are these newfangled practices and technologies,” but more “how could we actually do them here?”…

Over 40? You've used one of these. Of course you have The ZX81 was launched 37 years ago this week as a £49.95 kit (£69.95 assembled) and introduced an entire generation to the joys of computing, fights over the family television and prodigious use of sticky tape.…

CEO bullish as biz pushes Cypher QL and new DBaaS Emil Eifrem, chief exec of Neo4j, has said that graph databases are at a turning point for so long that you'd imagine he's bored of the line by now. But 2018 might just be the year his predictions come true.…

Don't panic: 'supremacy' is the point at which quantum kit trumps classical computers Google reckons it's on the cusp of demonstrating “quantum supremacy” with the development of a 72-qubit processor.…

This is why the IETF's SUITs squad wants to make IoT firmware updates fast and easy The IETF has noticed how badly Internet of Things firmware is managed, and wants it fixed.…

New HPs can survive 'repeated germicide wipes', but disclaimer says they can't cure anything HP Inc has announced a trio of slightly-odd products intended for use in hospitals.…

CEO says propaganda's a worry, but the deeper problem is Americans' credulity Searchers for Russian influence on the United States 2016 presidential election have of late swung their searchlights towards Reddit, which has tried to explain its role in the affair.…

First XCP-ng release, based on Xen Server 7.4's new GPU goodness, due March 31st XCP-ng, the effort to revive an open source version of XenServer, will go ahead after crushing its crowdfunding campaign.…

There is no honour among CPU thieves Cryptocurrency-mining malware-scum have started to write code that evicts rivals from compromised computers.…

Cisco's ambition for subscription adoption advances Cisco's updated its Tetration network monitoring software to tackle application security and multi-vendor policy enforcement.…

Not a typo. This stuff will make top-of-rack switches sizzle in 2019 Marvell Semiconductor is off and running with 802.3cd-compliant chips, and reckons it's the first sand-baker to ship to the standard.…

Veteran Jeff Jennings to get the band back together with VMware founder Diane Greene Jeff Jennings, VMware's senior veep and general manager for security and networking has left the company to join Google.…

If they are going v-e-r-y slowly A team of engineers have developed algorithms that reconstruct images of objects hiding around corners or behind walls, and believe it could be used to help make self-driving cars safer one day - albeit very slow ones at present.…

"It was a mistake," says exec. Facebook has apologized for sending out a survey to find out how the social network should respond when adult men ask teenaged girls for sexually explicit images.…

Memcached attacks are going to be this year's thing Last week, the code repository GitHub was taken off air in a 1.3Tbps denial of service attack. We predicted then that there would be more such attacks and it seems we were right.…

McIntyre going to Redmond as non-compete case wraps up Microsoft and IBM have settled a lawsuit over the former hiring away the latter's chief diversity officer.…

Not much brotherly love in this Philly court case Uber has been hit with a lawsuit over its failure to disclose the 2016 theft of its customer and driver records.…

My god, it's full of hydrocarbons A team of researchers carried out a series of experiments to study how complex hydrocarbons, an important class of molecules needed to create the building blocks for life, formed in space.…

Fly the insecure skies International airline Emirates leaks customers' sensitive personal information to third-party marketing partners and network adversaries, according to Konark Modi, a data security engineer for Cliqz, a privacy-focused browser based on Firefox.…

Redmond unveils custom US government versions of clouds Courting the lucrative government contract market, Microsoft has unveiled custom versions of Azure Stack and Microsoft 365 for the US government.…

Oak Ridge, Lawrence Livermore labs slated for beastmode kit in 2021-2023 The two new mystery exascale computing systems known only as Frontier and El Capitan popped up on a budget request last week. They are being developed by the US government and have been slated for deployment in 2022 and 2023.…

Inventor dies in poverty after patents didn’t protect Obit Trevor Baylis, one of Britain's most well-loved inventors and the creator of the clockwork radio that was designed to save lives in the developing world, has died at the age of 80 after battling Crohn's disease.…

ICO strategy outlines plans to slurp up academic expertise The Information Commissioner's Office has promised organisations a regulatory sandbox to test out the data protection implications of new tech as part of its first technology strategy.…

We're lost without you, Zuck. Save us! Comment Stand by for more clickbait. Facebook has abandoned its "fix" for news after publishers complained about a drop in traffic.…