The Register

It's a storage cocktail and it tastes... well, have a sip Roundup Have we got a bit of storage news for you. Our expert mixologist has poured all the bits and pieces into his cocktail shaker, added some ice, and poured the resulting storage fluid into a tumbler because all our highball glasses were in the dishwasher.…

Q4OS. Oh, gesundheit. Oh, that's the distro, is it... Review The Linux distribution Q4OS sounds like textspeak from a teenager from 1997, but it has potential, and it's not a bad option for Linux newbies.…

Handy guide to best and worst amendments tabled for new law The House of Lords will today start poring over the UK’s Data Protection Bill, line by line, as it enters committee stage.…

Be afraid, very afraid Microsoft stands accused of forcing customers to migrate to cloud services by introducing new licensing terms and raising prices for hosted Windows Server 2016, which could see monthly costs more than doubling.…

Nasty but nice: gaseous comet innards included water ice! On July 3rd, 2016 something unusual happened on Comet 67P/Churyumov–Gerasimenko: a fountain of dust erupted out of a hole and spewed all sorts of stuff into space.…

What is it with (mostly) single party states and crimps on cryptocurrency? The State Bank of Vietman has issued “Information related to the use of virtual currency” that bans use of the cryptocurrency for payments.…

Sure, the ideas spurt out in a torrent, but they're no longer potent SECRET CIO I had a vasectomy on Tuesday. After the procedure, as I sat sulking on the couch, sipping a cup of tea and clutching an icepack to the affected area, I thought I would quickly check my emails to see if there was anything that would take my mind off the experience.…

Fooling an image classifier is surprisingly easy and suggests novel attacks It doesn't take much to confuse AI image classifiers: a group from Japan's Kyushu University reckon you can fool them by changing the value of a single pixel in an image.…

'Partnership' will see HCL run future development, starting with version 10 in 2018 IBM has struck a “strategic partnership” with HCL Technologies that will see the latter firm take over development of its Notes, Domino, Sametime and Verse collaboration tools.…

We don' want no STEENKIN' proxies, as will be possible under new local laws Concerns at the effect of The Netherlands' new security laws could result in the country's certificate authority being pulled from Mozilla's trust list.…

RC7 is out and Linus would like to avoid rc8 if possible Linux kernel overlord Linus Torvalds wants to avoid an eighth release candidate for the new version of Linux, to avoid delays to the next version.…

Dearth of documentation slows maintenance for Joint Strike Flopper More than a decade after the first F-35 took to the air, the US military doesn't have a complete set of maintenance instructions, and spare parts shortages are keeping 22 per cent of the fleet out of the sky.…

Founders' correspondence and documents weren't yet digitised One of Silicon Valley's most important historic archives, that of the Hewlett-Packard company, has been destroyed in the Santa Rosa wildfires.…

Vote sinks by a third but Pirati can still reach government with its skeleton crew Still in the hunt to form governing coalition, if it can be bothered Iceland's privacy-friendly Pirate Party has lost four seats at new national elections.…

Chandrayaan-2 will send a rover and an orbiter to Luna India's space agency ISRO has announced its intention to launch a mission to the moon in 2018.…

The Roku Ultra is great. But its limitations are showing Review If you are going to buying a streaming media box – and you really should if you want to watch TV shows or movies on a big screen – then you should buy a Roku. It really is as simple as that.…

Scary flaws in time for Halloween weekend Roundup While the security world has been in full Holy Grail mode with BadRabbit, plenty of other stuff has been going on this week. Here's a roundup of everything else you need to know on top of what we've already reported.…

Not a great way, but an interesting way, to teach bots Computers are getting pretty good at translating the world's languages. However, as they say, onwards and upwards. Eggheads are now trying to teach machines to do the job in a more human-like way.…

$279 for the screen? F*%&!* With its iPhone X about to figuratively hit the streets, Apple has today revealed what it will charge when the new handsets literally hit the streets.…

Funnily enough, Qt says the latter The Qt Company would like to remind developers that JavaScript and HTML suck, at least in the world of embedded devices.…

Answer: Yes, but it's hard to prove Special report Schools across the United States are sounding the alarm on what looks suspiciously like an effort by the federal telecoms regulator to undermine efforts to build new broadband networks.…

Former CEO, biz allegedly misled investors America's financial watchdog will extract $1m from controversial insurance reseller Zenefits and its former CEO to settle claims they lied to investors.…

Inshert Hunt for Red October jokesh here The Ministry of National Defense of the People's Republic of China this week reported the first successful test of a magnetohydrodynamic drive that could let ships and submarines sneak around almost totally silently.…

Threat to NAND supply if talks fail and court favours Tosh Updated Western Digital revenues and profits rose in its first fiscal 2016 quarter but worries surfaced about its access to 96-layer 3D NAND if the Toshiba talks fail and it loses at court.…

Becomes one massive managed service provider Backup supplier Datto, with its combined on-premises/public cloud offering, has been scooped up by private equity.…

The 900P might run Star Citizen smoother – emphasis on 'might' As spotted a couple of days ago, Intel has announced a smaller Optane drive – the 900P.…

What the fudge, Evaluator Group and IOmark? Analysis Diane Greene's server-powered storage startup Datrium says it has achieved the highest-ever IOmark benchmark at 8,000 VMs on a DVX cluster, five times higher than the previous record by IBM's FlashSystem V9000 (1,600) and ten times more than an Intel server/VMware/vSAN Optane system (800) (PDF).…

A tactic ailing companies might want to use? How do you increase the value of your business by 300 per cent overnight? Simple, add a buzzword to your name.…

I can’t go into the details of our intelligence, but... The UK government has joined Microsoft in blaming North Korea for the WannaCry ransomware attack.…

Creepy Sophia strikes again Saudi Arabia has granted citizenship to a robot in a move that appears to elevate its rights above those of women within the Middle Eastern country.…

Europe's buying tech kit 'n' services Computacenter – one of Europe’s largest resellers – today reported Q3 financials that are sure to warm the cockles of investors' hearts: sales jumped by a fifth as businesses splashed the cash on tech kit and services.…

But numbers aren't everything, are they, Dyn? The Reaper IoT botnet is nowhere near as threatening as previously suggested, according to new research.…

And push for a gender pay gap report while you’re at it Oracle investors have reportedly been told to vote against the company’s executive pay plan, which would give bosses pay packets worth more than $100m.…

'People are doing it for high-end properties – why not Grimsby?' A man in Grimsby wants to flog his house for 18 Bitcoin (£81,305) because he calcuates the currency is a better investment than cold hard British pounds in the bank.…

Gear has less than half range needed to defend Heathrow DJI, the Chinese drone manufacturer, has been trying to win the trust of regulators with its new Aeroscope product. Yet the product itself falls short of its stated aim.…

Nissan brings new meaning to 'open door policy' Something for the Weekend, Sir? Cheep-cheep-cheep. I'll try again. Cheep-cheep-cheep. Nope, that didn't work, how about this? Cheep-cheep-cheep. Or… this? Cheep-cheep-cheep. Come on, lock up, you bastard car. Cheep-cheep-cheep.…

Compulsory layoffs coming if VR targets not met DXC Technologies is seeking volunteers in customer support teams to strap themselves to the redundancy cannon as the process of shipping jobs out of higher wage locations and into cheaper ones continues.…

Service was warned of the risks a year before ransomware hit The NHS could have fended off WannaCry "if only it had taken simple steps to protect its computers", but failed to heed warnings about falling victim to a cyber attack a full year before that incident happened.…

Elliot Management finds US$1.6bn for network intelligence outfit Networking vendor Gigamon has agreed to sell itself to private equity concern Elliot Management, for around US$1.6bn.…

Office's only climate controller was in the server room, so everyone wanted in On-Call Far out, it's Friday! Which means it's time for another edition of On-Call, El Reg's week-ending reader-contributed tales of support gigs that went south.…

This is why Windows Server 1709 left it out. While you wait, have proper SCOM crypto Microsoft's offered an explanation, of sorts, for the unexpected disappearance of Storage Spaces Direct from Windows Server version 1709.…

Boffins think 'dendrites' are the inevitable result of re-charges, which is awkward Video For the first time a group of scientists has captured close-up images of mysterious finger-like growths known as dendrites that can lead to short circuits and fires in the lithium-ion batteries that power hordes of smartphones, laptops and other gadgetries.…

Astro-boffins have waited decades to see something with such an odd orbit Astronomers have spotted an object that they believe came from another star system.…

Flash arrays have singed SANs, so Cisco's turned on the data tap to help you burn bottlenecks Cisco's decided to save the world from all-flash arrays by giving it a new 32G Fabric Switch, an upgraded Nexus 93180 and data galore.…

Hey, there's always money in the cellular modems, huh? Intel reported better than expected results for the third quarter of the year, beating analysts' predictions.…

Carrier already this overseas, seeks Oz punters' opinions on 'NBN extras' plan, name Vodafone Australia is market testing a product called “nbn extras” that will see it offer voice-over-WiFi or a virtual landline that redirects to mobile phones.…

More cloud, more integration and more security is new CEO Henshall's plan Citrix's new CEO has revealed his plan for the company and it looks like more of the same.…

Google star of the show, again Google parent Alphabet announced on Thursday a better-than-expected quarter, driving up its share price.…

Azure up, Office going great, LinkedIn... not terrible Microsoft is crediting its Azure and Office cloud operations with helping to drive a better-than-expected start to its fiscal year.…

AWS revenue up 42 per cent, compared to 34 per cent overall Defying subdued predictions, Amazon on Thursday reported healthy third-quarter earnings of $0.52 per diluted share, based on net income of $256m, on par with $0.52 per diluted share and $252m a year ago.…