The Register

And Marvell and Cavium also hopping into bed, allegedly Broadcom is channeling Dr Evil of Austin Powers fame, and considering blowing more than $100bn to buy Qualcomm, it was claimed on Friday.…

In America, at least No, funnily enough, US tech monster Google doesn't have to obey a Canadian court order in America, a judge in the ad giant's home turf of California ruled this week.…

Rap for whack WhatsApp chat app chaps in ad crap flap Once again Google's Play Store has proved less than excellent at tackling malicious apps, after netizens found a fake version of WhatsApp that was good enough to fool over a million people into downloading it.…

Nothing to see here, move along. Go back to your homes Senior Equifax executives sold their shares in the credit agency just before its stock price plunged when the world was told it had been thoroughly hacked.…

FeatureHub could help arduous process of feature engineering Boffins at MIT have proposed a GitHub-style collaborative platform to speed up one of the first, most challenging stages of data analysis.…

Chinese fantasy star fell for fake A Swiss Hotel bar has apologised to a Chinese fantasy novelist who paid $10,000 (£7,649) for a shot of rare whisky – only to discover the single malt was a fake.…

More say it's a bad idea than a good idea As Apple bloggers anxiously try to be positive about Apple's Face ID, a poll suggests potential customers may actually be repelled by the face-scanning technology.…

Update or fin for the Finnic people's cards The Estonian government is suspending the use of the Baltic country’s identity smartcards in response to a recently discovered and wide-ranging security flaw.…

Plus: IP leak bug fixed in Tor Browser on macOS, Linux Tor developers have taken the wraps off the next generation of onion services.…

Virtue-signalling virility symbols don't come cheap Stocks sleuth Toni Sacconaghi Jr. has shed some light on why the market reacted badly to Tesla Inc's financials this week.…

FAS ONTAP storage + Fujitsu servers + Extreme switches EMC introduced its converged infrastructure Vblock concept, integrating Cisco servers and networking, and EMC storage, in a rack system, in November 2009. Now, eight years later, Fujitsu and NetApp are getting into the idea with NFLEX.…

Tinkerers reveal first Stacked SLP in a mainstream mobe The iPhone X's face recognition may be experiencing teething problems but the thousand-quid handset is a masterpiece of engineering.…

But Tableau, Teradata grapple with transition to subscriptions It's results time again, and Hadoop-flinger Hortonworks has reported a positive quarter, with revenues up and a slight shrinkage in its operating losses.…

Biz balked at wobbly markets, allegedly British mast outfit Arqiva has pulled out of plans for a £6bn IPO, citing "market uncertainty" as the reason for a lack of investors.…

It's almost 2018 and the lack of HSTS makes no sense Analysis High street banks should be exemplars of good security but many are letting the side down when it comes to following cryptographic best practice.…

Save big with blind bird tickets this month Events The call for papers for Continuous Lifecycle London 18 is closed and we’re putting the finishing touches to the draft agenda before informing the lucky speakers.…

PowerEdge software deal 'purely fulfilment'. U ok hun? Isilon-owning Dell has sealed a deal with Isilon competitor Elastifile to supply the Israeli startup's software, meaning its server agents, Cloud File System and CloudConnect data moving software come bundled with Dell PowerEdge servers.…

We show raw event log blizzards as usable correlated patterns, they croon Analysis Where the heck am I going? Being a sysadmin in a containerised environment can be like driving a car in fog with no lights and no instruments.…

The Storage Performance Council Benchmarks SPONSORED With the accelerations in cloud computing and server virtualizations and changes in layouts, IT devices are required to handle multiple integrations instead of just a single application. Enterprise demand shorter wait times and higher availability. This in turn means enterprise IT systems must be able to reduce transactional response times and job query times while enhancing concurrent processing capabilities.…

Cyber Monday is coming but I still feel so green Something for the Weekend, Sir? An eerie green glow is radiating from my 1960s sideboard.…

Aruba's new digs in Santa Clara are the right fit for 'smaller, nimbler company' HPE's many rounds of redundancies and sell-offs have seen it decide the time is right to downsize its headquarters and move it away from its birthplace in Palo Alto.…

Diplomatic sysadmin shares stories from the field, like the monkey that ate a USB drive containing classified files ON-CALL Welcome to yet another instalment of On-Call, The Register's week-ending column in which we share readers' stories of extreme sysadminnery performed under extreme duress.…

Peak Apple? With 37 per cent margins and $268bn cash, let us all have such peaks! Apple's coined it for another quarter.…

Celebrity cryptocurrency endorsements labelled 'potentially unlawful promotion' The United States' Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) has warned investors that celebrities may not understand that their endorsements of initial coin offerings are in breach of the law.…

Everything in Australia wants to kill you and if they can't find flesh, telco cabling will do Australia's national broadband network (NBN) is being pecked apart by birds.…

Software-defined WANs give Virtzilla more SaaS to sell and a better pitch to telcos VMware's acquired VeloCloud and will use its wares to extend its NSX software-defined networking platform to the wide area network.…

Talk about a mic drop Updated For a few minutes on Thursday afternoon, Pacific Time, the Twitter account of US President Donald J. Trump ceased to exist – sensationally deleted by a Twitter staffer on their last day of work, we're told.…

Well, that's one way to announce 'I quit', we guess For a few minutes on Thursday afternoon, Pacific Time, the Twitter account of US President Donald J. Trump ceased to exist.…

Plus: iGiant announces bumper quarter of sales In its 10-K financial filing on Monday, a day before Apple's fiscal Q4 earnings, chipmaker Qualcomm revealed it has sued Apple yet again, this time for breach of contract.…

Also known as the We Haven't Got a Clue defense Internet overlord ICANN has hit on an ingenious solution to the impending collision of the domain name system's Whois service and incoming European privacy legislation: let everyone else figure it out.…

Also known as the We Haven't Got a Clue defense Internet overlord ICANN has hit on an ingenious solution to the impending collision of the domain name system's Whois service and incoming European privacy legislation: let everyone else figure it out.…

Pharaoh-nominal science breakthrough Scientists have uncovered a hidden void in the largest pyramid in Giza, Egypt, using muons – a particle typically produced by cosmic rays, according to new research published today.…

Didn't help that the automaker's financial results also sucked Tesla's share price took a dive Thursday morning as Republicans in Congress revealed they were planning to kill off a US federal tax credit for electric vehicles.…

No humans were reading your stuff, just to be clear Eager to avoid the perception that it has been leafing through netizens' files – a fear it has contended with at least since it began scanning Gmail messages to inform its ad biz – Google on Thursday issued a second statement to explain why it erroneously flagged files for a small percentage of Docs and Drive users as violating its Terms of Service two days ago.…

So sorry <kerching> about the Russians <kerching> and ISIS Facebook is one of the most ruthlessly efficient money-making machines in history, and has exceeded $10bn revenue in a quarter for the first time. Gross revenue of $10.3bn means the company earns some $4.67m every hour, $77,794 per minute, or $1,296 every second.…

Prosecutors 'could bring a case next year' The US government has identified "more than six members of the Russian government" involved in hacking the Democratic National Committee's computers and leaking information during last year's presidential election.…

InfiniBand, NVMe or Fibre Channel access? All three actually Analysis The latest FlashSystem from IBM uses InfiniBand to hook up the 900 flash box to the SA9000 and A9000R servers running the SVC software. Where does that leave NVMe over Fabrics?…

First casualty in ICO's data-broking investigation Data-broker Verso has been ordered to cough up £80,000 after failing to tell people exactly what their info would be used for.…

Arrays in a manger? Mmm. Who knows what EXTEN Tech'll get up to... NVMe over Fabrics storage pioneer Mangstor seems to be vanishing before our eyes and being replaced by EXTEN Technologies.…

Now we can all toss in the Colonel's secret herbs and spices A campaign launched in Japan has meant anyone partial to diving into a tub of finger lickin' good chicken now has the chance to literally do just that, thanks to the arrival of the KFC Bath Bomb.…

They're exploiting already infected bodies, say researchers Cybercrooks are directly attacking banks in multiple countries using a trojan dubbed Silence.…

Ahoy there, m'ducky. Chart a course t'Doncaster One landlocked council's battle with fly-tipping has taken a nautical twist this week after it had to deal with a speedboat... left in a road.…

Yet more problems for the firm's long-suffering customers Beleaguered TalkTalk customers are complaining that their landline and mobile phones ring at the same time, an issue that appears to be due to a glitch in the telco's Talk2Go app.…

That's 376,000 down, 424,000 to go before the year is out Virgin Media will fall significantly short of connecting 800,000 new customers to its ultrafast Project Lightning broadband this year – a target set prior to the firm's mis-selling scandal – according to its third-quarter preliminary results.…

Sales fall, losses grow, but watch looks OK Fitbit's year-on-year losses grew fivefold to $113.4m compared to a year ago, with sales of 3.6 million devices in the quarter, 7 per cent up from the previous quarter. The firm admitted it had been a "difficult year" as the fitness band craze diminished, with sales down considerably compared to the same period of 2016.…

Lloyds lost, Halif*xed, and Bank of Scotland scotched Lloyds Bank, Halifax and Bank of Scotland’s online and mobile banking services have all gone down this morning, leaving a trail of angry customers in their wake.…

Google's new best buddy will revive Android One Hands On HTC will have two new devices in the stores this month, and insists it has held onto a sizeable phone division, even after the reassignment of 2,000 HTC staff to the Chocolate Factory.…

Safety regulator gives head office the whole nine yards British military helicopters are at risk of crashing while wheels are literally falling off Army Land Rovers thanks to poor maintenance and funding cuts, according to a damning report by the Defence Safety Authority.…

Consumer-facing bit good, enterprise... not so much BT reported a 4 per cent drop in net income to £1.8bn for its second quarter as sports TV rights costs and its underperforming outsourcing biz hit the bottom line.…

Not so super-committed to computers now then... Japanese tech pusher Fujitsu has finally - as expected - found a solution for its ailing PC business: it will sell a majority stake to Lenovo for up to JPY28bn (£187m) that will be used to form a joint venture.…