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Updated 2024-04-30 09:32
Guy Who Got a C on Constitutional-Amendment Paper GETS CONSTITUTION AMENDED
They are considering changing that to an A, which seems appropriate. Related StoriesIs the President Immune From Civil Lawsuits?More on the Quest of King AllanLawyer Who Wrote Torture Memos Has “Grave Concerns” About Trump
The Oxford Comma: You Should Use It
If you need it, that is. And they needed it here. Related StoriesJudge Richard Posner: Cat PersonDesirable It Is That You Luxuriate in the Octopoid Embrace of These Legal PostulationsI'll Show You a Run-On Sentence
Judge Richard Posner: Cat Person
Cats do funny things. Sometimes in judicial opinions. Related StoriesThe Oxford Comma: Use ItDesirable It Is That You Luxuriate in the Octopoid Embrace of These Legal PostulationsI'll Show You a Run-On Sentence
Your Behaviour Is That of a Lunatic, Your Honor
"I am sorry to tell you that I am convinced you have lost your mind." Related StoriesDesirable It Is That You Luxuriate in the Octopoid Embrace of These Legal PostulationsFrozen Guru Update IIILord Hanuman Gets Another Court Summons
Lawyer’s Pants on Fire During Closing Argument
It's not clear exactly what he was saying when the fire broke out, but this probably didn't improve his credibility. Related StoriesFollow the Chicken, Dramatized
Cow-Threatener’s Conviction Affirmed
The Swiss federal tribunal rejected his argument that he acted in self-defense. Related StoriesIdaho May Legalize Dachshund RacingDefendants: “We Never Had a Pet Squirrel”Battle of the Joes Is Back On
Idaho May Legalize Dachshund Racing
It may or may not be illegal at the moment, but you can't be too careful. Related StoriesGovernors Veto Official-Bible BillsCow-Threatener's Conviction AffirmedBill Urges Texans to Use Correct Flag Emoji
More on the Quest of King Allan
None of which makes success look more likely. Related StoriesTree Not ArrestedWay Less Than You Need to Know About the Civil- and Common-Law SystemsGarland Claims Longest-Wait Record from Brandeis
TAKE HEED AND REJOICE: King Allan of Gondor Hath Returned
Or at least he's planning to. Is there a direct flight from Denver to Gondor? That'd be helpful. Related Stories“Drive” Litigation Still Running, SomehowSolicitor Sues Oxford for Negligent TeachingMan Who Shot Mother-in-Law Says He Was Aiming at an Armadillo
Official State Crap: Florida
The ninth in this occasional series. Related StoriesPond Ruins Yet Another GetawayIs It Illegal to Make Your Spouse Ride on the Roof of the Car?Is an Alligator a “Deadly Weapon”?
Good News: The “Motion to Spread Death” Was Denied
These motions are sometimes granted, but it's not as scary as you might think. Related StoriesWait—Which One of You Was Injured Again?Banks Sued Over “Craptacular” Loan PracticesSolicitor Sues Oxford for Negligent Teaching
Latest Airport-Security Exploit: Walking Through in a Group
Don't worry, though—they screened them after they landed at their destination. Related StoriesLawyer Who Wrote Torture Memos Has “Grave Concerns” About TrumpAdministration Fails to Secure Its Own Conference RoomNational Guard Deployed to Seize One Marijuana Plant
Suspect Steals Mortuary Van, Finds Body Inside, Returns Both
Always check the back seat. Related StoriesPolice: Burglars Not Hard to Track in Snow“Spelling Bee Bandit” Arrested for String of RoberiesDoody Convicts Rectal Smuggler
Bill Urges Texans to Use Correct Flag Emoji
There would be no criminal penalties for using the wrong one ... yet. Related StoriesBritish MP Demands Correct Pronoun for Royal YachtGovernors Veto Official-Bible BillsHR 1220: Urging Members to Stop Saying “Physical” Instead of “Fiscal”
Luxuriate in the Octopoid Embrace of These Legal Postulations
Invigilate your eyes on the quintessence of this dispute. Related StoriesI'll Show You a Run-On SentenceFrozen Guru Update IIIHow to Write an Introduction (or How Not to)
Police: Burglars Not Hard to Track in Snow
Or smart enough to wait for spring. Related StoriesDoody Convicts Rectal SmugglerSuspect Steals Mortuary Van, Finds Body Inside, Returns Both“Spelling Bee Bandit” Arrested for String of Roberies
Congratulations, Lady Who Shut Down Dance by Citing Obscure Law
Her heroic actions prevented ... fun. Related StoriesALERT: There Are No Lawyers in the Kansas SenateFrench Town That Banned UFOs Is Still Banning ThemHow Do I Get a Reincarnation Permit?
Woman Gets a Ticket for Parking Two Seconds Early
The ticket lasted about the same length of time in court, once the judge got a look at it. Related StoriesSome AnnouncementsZamboni in the Drive-Thru: “Most Canadian Thing Ever”?Pants in the News
Lawyer Who Wrote Torture Memos Has “Grave Concerns” About Trump
Proof that if you have enough opinions, sooner or later one of them will be right. Just statistically speaking. Related StoriesNational Guard Deployed to Seize One Marijuana PlantHow and Why to Delete Your Yahoo AccountWhat Is Treason?
Johnny Depp Allegedly Spent $3M to Blast Hunter S. Thompson Out of a Cannon
They say this like it's a bad thing. Related StoriesUpdate: Neil Armstrong's Hair Is Still for SaleWhat's Up With the “Trump University” Lawsuits?
Utah Supreme Court Affirms a Woman’s Right to Sue Herself
Did Bagley win Bagley v. Bagley? Yes!But also no.
Wait. Which One of You Was Injured Again?
Okay, so, you're Mary Jo, and you're Francine? Oh boy. Related StoriesBanks Sued Over “Craptacular” Loan PracticesSolicitor Sues Oxford for Negligent TeachingLord Hanuman Gets Another Court Summons
Administration Fails to Secure Its Own Conference Room
In the future an impenetrable wall will be erected around all such locations, although who will pay for that remains to be seen. Related StoriesNational Guard Deployed to Seize One Marijuana PlantHow and Why to Delete Your Yahoo AccountWhat Is Treason?
Assorted Stupidity #99.5
In this edition: be on the lookout for orange fingers; the difference between accidental and intentional; police piling on; and a victory for the rule of law (involving traffic cameras, but it's a start). Related StoriesAssorted Stupidity #99Assorted Stupidity #98Assorted Stupidity #97
“Spelling Bee Bandit” Arrested for String of Roberies
I hope you realize that's how HE spelled it. Related StoriesDoody Convicts Rectal SmugglerPond Ruins Yet Another GetawayMan Charged With Stealing 784,000 Quarters
Belgian Parliament Decides to Keep Serving Itself Free [?] Beer
To be honest I wouldn't give up that privilege either. Related Stories“Downton Abbey” Congressman's Indictment Is a HootAbout Those FoldersALERT: There Are No Lawyers in the Kansas Senate
I’ll Show You a Run-On Sentence
Not recommended for beginners, but this guy got away with it, and well done. Related StoriesHow to Write an Introduction (or How Not to)Brief Argues Klingon Language Can't Be Copyrighted
A Visual Study Guide for the New York Bar Exam
It also has many words, and might help you or someone you know who has, for whatever reason, decided to take the NY bar. Related StoriesThe Tri-State Monkey Smuggle, and Other Stories
Bill Would Provide Immunity for Accidentally Running Over Protesters
Let's apply the rational-basis test to this one. Related StoriesSeriously, Though: Nobody Has the Right to AppealCourt Says Police Need to Make Time for “This Constitutional Bullshit”National Guard Deployed to Seize One Marijuana Plant
“Downton Abbey” Congressman’s Indictment Is a Hoot
At least he didn't delete any emails. (He actually said that.) Related StoriesAbout Those FoldersALERT: There Are No Lawyers in the Kansas SenateCriminal's Modus Operandi Probably Just Means He Can't Spell “Modus Operandi”
About Those Folders
You know the ones. Related Stories“Downton Abbey” Congressman's Indictment Is a HootALERT: There Are No Lawyers in the Kansas SenateCongress Blames President for Law He Vetoed
ALERT: There Are No Lawyers in the Kansas Senate
I'm frankly not sure why I put "ALERT" in front of that, or why I'm leaving it there. In any event, for the first time ever, the Kansas Senate is lawyer-free. Related StoriesKansas Senator Says Temptresses Must Cover ThemselvesYou Know, Karl, There Have Also Been Criminals Named “Karl”“Downton Abbey” Congressman's Indictment Is a Hoot
Good Reason to Kill #66: Took a Bite of Your Grilled-Cheese Sandwich
So I’m working on some stuff about the Emoluments Clause, the anti-nepotism law, and property rights in space, and, I mean, all very interesting, of course, but sometimes you just want to quickly mention that a dude ended up in a... Related StoriesGood Reason to Kill #2: YahtzeeGood Reason to Kill #64: Threw Away Your Lego CollectionGood Reason to Kill #63: Golfing Too Slowly
“Drive” Litigation Still Running, Somehow
Plaintiff thought there'd be more driving in the movie, you see, and less "slow paced, interpersonal drama." Related StoriesSolicitor Sues Oxford for Negligent TeachingMuseum Sued for Art Depicting Jesus as White
Hot-Yoga Guy and His Cars Are Missing
Also a $3 million watch, and his soul. Related StoriesUpdate: Neil Armstrong's Hair Is Still for SaleWhat's Up With the “Trump University” Lawsuits?
Some Announcements
A blessedly short travel summary, a new book on the way, a presentation on January 30, and a few even more trivial things. Related StoriesZamboni in the Drive-Thru: “Most Canadian Thing Ever”?Pants in the NewsLowering the Bar Almost Makes Law360’s List of Top 5 Law Blogs
Defendants: “We Never Had a Pet Squirrel”
Or so they claim. But a jury may have to decide that. Related StoriesCat InsultedDachshund Racing Declared Illegal in IdahoIs an Alligator a “Deadly Weapon”?
Top Ten Posts of 2016
Wow, what a ridiculous year. Related StoriesZamboni in the Drive-Thru: “Most Canadian Thing Ever”?Pants in the NewsLowering the Bar Almost Makes Law360’s List of Top 5 Law Blogs
Assorted Stupidity #99
In this edition: how to get stuck in a hay bale and live, driving under the influence of caffeine, some stuff about robberies, and a teensy border conflict ends peacefully. Related StoriesAssorted Stupidity #98Assorted Stupidity #97Assorted Stupidity #96
Banks Sued Over “Craptacular” Loan Practices
Also craptacular: their email practices. Related StoriesSolicitor Sues Oxford for Negligent TeachingLord Hanuman Gets Another Court Summons
Zamboni in the Drive-Thru: “Most Canadian Thing Ever”?
With a brief digression into the story of Christmas. Sort of. Related StoriesTop Ten Posts of 2016Doody Convicts Rectal SmugglerJustice Done in Canada With Convictions in Maple-Syrup Heist
Pagan Allowed to Wear Horns in License Photo
This picture is probably enough here, but there are some additional words inside. Related StoriesFrench Town That Banned UFOs Is Still Banning ThemCat InsultedCourt Rules Donald Isn't a Fascist
Electoral College Update
Fourteen people got at least one vote for either president or vice-president. I think. Related StoriesLawyer Indicted for Impersonating a Judge Is Elected to Be Real JudgeThe Worst Presidential Race in American HistoryWhat's Up With the “Trump University” Lawsuits?
When Do We Graduate from the Electoral College?
The Constitution says one thing, but we do another. Seems odd. Related StoriesSeriously, Though: Nobody Has the Right to AppealCourt Says Police Need to Make Time for “This Constitutional Bullshit”National Guard Deployed to Seize One Marijuana Plant
Good Reason to Kill #2: Yahtzee
I'll tell you right up front: this post is completely ridiculous. Related StoriesGood Reason to Kill #65: Played Computer Games “Too Often”Good Reason to Kill #64: Threw Away Your Lego CollectionGood Reason to Kill #63: Golfing Too Slowly
Good Reason to Kill #65: Played Computer Games “Too Often”
The victim was assaulted with a Playstation controller. Related StoriesGood Reason to Kill #2: YahtzeeGood Reason to Kill #64: Threw Away Your Lego CollectionGood Reason to Kill #63: Golfing Too Slowly
Doody Convicts Rectal Smuggler
It took a while for the truth to come out. Related StoriesCriminal's Modus Operandi Probably Just Means He Can't Spell “Modus Operandi”Justice Done in Canada With Convictions in Maple-Syrup HeistBattle of the Joes Is Back On
Canadians Puzzled by Warning That Snow Globes May Cause Cancer
They may not be as used to dopey warnings as Americans are.
Assorted Stupidity #98
In this edition: law firm sues client, learns why that's a bad idea; asset-forfeiture programs are still heinous; an unlikely bathroom-cleaning lawsuit; and how to make a little extra cash in Ghana. Related StoriesAssorted Stupidity #97Assorted Stupidity #96Assorted Stupidity #95
Solicitor Sues Oxford for Negligent Teaching
Its failure to give him a top grade has harmed his legal career, you see. Related StoriesLord Hanuman Gets Another Court SummonsMuseum Sued for Art Depicting Jesus as White
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