Article 4WPH5 Luddite In 2070 Refuses To Merge Consciousness With Self-Driving Hyundai Elantra

Luddite In 2070 Refuses To Merge Consciousness With Self-Driving Hyundai Elantra

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The Onion on Local, shared by The Onion to The Oni
from The Onion on (#4WPH5)
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ULTRA-TOPEKA, KS-Holding his hand over the USB port implanted below his left ear, local Luddite Thomas Berkshire reportedly refused to merge consciousness Tuesday with his new self-driving 2070 Hyundai Elantra. "Uh oh, big scary technology is gonna steal Thomas's very essence if he plugs in his brain stem to the car's"

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