Deadspin > Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

When you’re a kid, it’s perfectly fine to partake in an array of bizarre or grotesque behaviors. Whether you’ve decided to chop your own hair off, get married to a stuffed animal, or just to scribble nonsense all over the walls, you are set—this is the only time in your life when adults might even mistake those…Read more...

Here we have yet another South American soccer player who apparently can’t differentiate between the kinds of kicks you use to score goals as Messi when playing FIFA and those you use to punt opponents’ heads off their bodies as Sub-Zero in Mortal Kombat:Read more...

An independent review panel tasked with evaluating corruption and match fixing in professional tennis, mostly in the lower levels of the sport, has finally released a report that essentially says there is a whole lot of corruption and match-fixing in professionl tennis, mostly in the lower levels of the sport. But…Read more...

The Boston Celtics fended off a tough Bucks squad last night at home to take a commanding 3-2 lead, thanks to a big night from Al Horford, solid defense from their bench, and a critical missed call late in the fourth quarter. With 1:14 left, Al Horford hoisted a three-pointer that clearly left his hand after the shot…Read more...

Every baseball rookie has his “Welcome to the bigs” moment. Padres pitcher Eric Lauer’s would be better characterized as a “You’re playing real baseball now, motherfucker” experience.Read more...

The NFL draft will be taking place inside the Dallas Cowboys’ stadium this weekend, and ESPN’s broadcast team is currently holed up in a nearby hotel preparing for the big day. Based on images provided by a source, that preparation involves writing a lot of stuff on whiteboards.Read more...

Baseball prince Shohei Ohtani got knocked around in his last start against the Red Sox and had to leave the game after two innings due to a blister on his pitching hand. That was a bummer, mostly because blisters have a way of being incurable nuisances capable of undermining entire seasons. So when Ohtani took the…Read more...

Varsity Blues works as long as you don’t think about it too hard. Which, I readily admit, probably means it works exactly as well as intended.Read more...

Condoleezza Rice and her fellow members of the Commission on College Basketball stood on stage in Indianapolis Wednesday morning and announced to the world their plan to fix college basketball—aside from a few bright spots, it was a largely disappointing, half-hearted attempt at pushing back the inevitable decay of…Read more...

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Bonsai trees have been a Japanese tradition for thousands of years, and maybe you can add a bit more zen to your life in a more natural way with this Gold Box. Choose from a 15 different kinds of trees like jade, maple, juniper, and more.

Chinatrust Brothers, one of the most popular pro teams in Taiwan, will don Dragon Ball Z themed uniforms when playing the Uni-President 7-Eleven Lions on May 5 and 6.

The impressive wingspan of Texas Rangers rookie Ronald Guzmán has earned him the nickname The Condor, which doesn’t exactly conjure up an image of flexibility or litheness, but the first baseman embodied just those qualities during tonight’s sixth inning with a picture-perfect split:Read more...

The Mets jumped out to a hot start to the year, but they didn’t have much help there from Yoenis Céspedes, who entered today hitting .195/.258/.354 after striking out in more than 40 percent of his plate appearances. But forget all that for now, and just enjoy this towering dinger that he delivered in the fifth inning…Read more...

An idiot on the field at Yankee Stadium got dropped by security like he was a running back in the Meadowlands during the seventh inning of tonight’s Twins-Yankees game. The broadcast cameras refused to show him (ugh), but two fan videos—and the brilliant photo seen above—captured most of the event.Read more...

It wasn’t quite as iconic as the absolutely perfect time he moved the on-deck circle last year. But Adrián Beltré continues to be the best in the world at turning otherwise mundane baseball plays into bursts of fun. In this case, it didn’t amount to anything tangible for his team, but you have to admire the…Read more...

Midway through the process of finding the precise Hannibal reference to throw into a headline about how thoroughly Mohamed Salah had obliterated the Roman forces sent to Liverpool in today’s fantastic Champions League semifinal, Roma stormed back from what was a 5-0 deficit to seal for themselves a 5-2 result and made…Read more...

Meet Boujee, the six-month-old French bulldog puppy of Steelers receiver JuJu Smith-Schuster. Say hello to Boujee. Despite having the standard breathing issues of his breed, he’s a decent athlete with a real nose for the ball. Check out his vertical leap.Read more...

We see a lot of deals around the web over on Kinja Deals, but these were our ten favorites today.

Eagles center Jason Kelce had a wild and memorable time at the team’s Super Bowl parade in February, but it seems that one of the more outlandish things that happened to him escaped the view of the cameras.

Privé Revaux turned the sunglass industry on its head last year with a wide variety of attractive frames for just $30 each, but you can get them for even less today with 20% promo code PRSPRING.

After the madness of the post-apocalyptic scenes from Liverpool’s Champions League quarterfinal home leg against Manchester City, it’s hard to act surprised when a European night at Anfield results in some dangerously intense fan behavior. Liverpool’s festivities ahead of their semifinal against Roma weren’t any…Read more...

Stringy Bucks big man Thon Maker has come up huge for the Bucks in their surprisingly competitive and entertaining first-round series against the Celtics. Maker averaged just 4.8 points, 3.0 boards, and 0.7 blocks a game in the regular season, and he basically didn’t play through the series’ first two games in Boston.…Read more...

So much of your life is impossible to give order to. A mango is not one of those things. It may seem like one, big gooey lump that it is, but it is not. It can be given perfect geometric clarity with just a few tactical blade strokes. I can’t recommend solving many of your other problems this way, but it does work for…Read more...

Last month, former Saints cheerleader Bailey Davis filed a discrimination complaint against the NFL after she was fired for posting an Instagram photo of herself in a bathing suit. The photo violated a Saints rule forbidding cheerleaders from “appearing nude, seminude or in lingerie,” which is an equally regressive…Read more...

Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we’re talking about cooking, tongue removal, Texas, and more.

A few years ago, when I was a naive writer at a very different publication, I decided to do a story about an energy drink that also happened to be a respected patron of the arts.

Pro MMA veteran Leslie Smith was supposed to fight on last weekend’s UFC Fight Night card, but her bout with Aspen Ladd was scrapped under strange circumstances. Ladd weighed in 1.8 pounds over the limit, claiming that “certain female circumstances” kept her from being able to cut weight. Smith initially okayed the…Read more...

Giancarlo Stanton’s had a rough go of it so far in the Bronx, recording a pair of platinum sombreros and striking out 32 times in 92 plate appearances, enough to turn Yankee Stadium into hostile territory. But during the fifth inning of the Yankees’ 14-1 victory over the Twins Monday, Stanton showed how he can make…Read more...

A new report states that just one out of every four athletic directors are in favor of giving athletes the ability to make money off their name based off their athletic abilities.

The Houston Rockets led by one point, 50-49, at the end of the first half last night in Minnesota. So it’s not like they were in a crisis situation. But if a lead can be said to be an ugly and bad one, this qualified.

That was quick.Read more...

With their 4-2 series win over Columbus, the Capitals are going to play in their seventh second-round playoff series in the last 11 years. That’s incredible! Don’t ask how they did in those second-round series.

If there’s any justice in the world, Mohamed Salah will be rewarded for his jaw-dropping, record-making, goal-packed, unforgettably great season with the highest individual award in the land, the Ballon d’Or.Read more...

Rack up savings on Pop Chart Lab’s sitewide sale, a curved Samsung monitor, Waste King garbage disposals, and more.Read more...

io9 New Venom Trailer Finally Shows Tom Hardy Turning into the Marvel Comics Anti-Hero | Jalopnik Engineering Firm That Panned Tesla Model 3's Build Quality Lauds Its Electronics And Handling | Kotaku Another Black Panther Statue Destroyed In South Korea | Lifehacker How to Use Google’s New Podcast Player |Read more...

If you want a tangible explanation for why the Oklahoma City Thunder are down 3-1 in their playoff series against the Jazz and seem destined for a first-round exit, take your pick: Rudy Gobert has effectively canceled out Russell Westbrook’s ability to drive to the hoop; Russell Westbrook has no jumper; it’s been six…Read more...

If you’ve got the space for it, this Gold’s Gym Olympic Bench includes a six roll leg developer, a preacher pad, and a full rack. Basically, everything you need for a good workout, except the weights. Today’s $139 price is within $10 for an all-time low, and comes with free shipping despite weighing more than 100…Read more...

Ten people were killed and 15 others hospitalized on Monday when a man drove a rented van onto the sidewalk and plowed through pedestrians for more than half a mile on one of Toronto’s busiest streets. It feels almost rote by this point to transition from tragedy to sporting event, but it makes sense. Where else but…Read more...

Every so often, we see deals on individual Waste King garbage disposal models, and our readers always buy a ton of them. Today though, you’ve got two different choices in Amazon’s Gold Box.

It doesn’t take long at all for any debate about a balk to feel extremely stupid, or, at least, extremely tiring; this is due, in large part, to the fact that there’s no great shared understanding of what a balk is. Not among fans or broadcasters or even umpires, sure, but not quite among the league’s own documents,…Read more...

A Pennsylvania golf club called police on five members this weekend after the club’s co-owner felt that the group was playing too slowly and claimed that they did not leave the course when asked. The members—all five of whom are black women—say that they were discriminated against.Read more...

Today’s edition of the Engelb Vielma Tracker must open with an apology: We recognize that this update is tardy, and for that, we are deeply sorry.Read more...

Buried near the end of this New York Times article about the Super Bowl champion Philadelphia Eagles talking to the White House about planning a visit is a tidbit about team owner Jeffrey Lurie “using a vulgarity” to call Donald Trump’s presidency “disastrous.” That quote seems like it’d be more important than two…Read more...

The day after Dateline aired an hour long investigation in USA Gymnastics’ handling of sex abuse allegations and Larry Nassar—with interviews with McKayla Maroney and Martha and Bela Karolyi—USA Gymnastics released a feel-good seven-minute video about Simone Biles’s comeback.Read more...

io9 How the Marvel Cinematic Universe Left Its TV Side Behind | Jalopnik Why Ford Isn’t Using GM’s Nine-Speed Automatic Transmission | Kotaku 13 Cool Things People Have Built With The Nintendo Labo | Lifehacker How to Create Your Own Cryptocurrency |Read more...

Keeping his promise from two weeks ago, Dominique “SonicFox” McLean showed up to the Clutch 2018 fighting game tournament last weekend in a custom-made fursuit. Naturally, he continued to kick everyone’s asses.

If he hadn’t out-pitched Justin Verlander and completely baffled the defending world champions for seven innings on Sunday Night Baseball last week, there is a decent chance that Bartolo Colon might not have started another game for the Texas Rangers. The pitcher whose spot Colon filled last Sunday is now healthy,…Read more...

Congratulations to the young Afghanistan veteran who is the first recipient of a successful penis and scrotal transplant—and congratulations to Devon Medical Art for making this brief video that makes the process absolutely mesmerizing to watch.Read more...

Bay Area ABC7 sports anchor Mike Shumann was sent home from San Antonio and kept off the air for Sunday’s Warriors-Spurs game after he was caught stealing the jacket of the Golden State Warriors’ director of team security, according to The Athletic.Read more...

At long last, ESPN NFL insider Adam Schefter has determined that Tom Brady, who everyone on Earth assumed was going to be playing football for the Patriots next season, is going to be playing football for the Patriots next season.